Time for an un-private entry
My last few entries have been private. But I am ready to do an un-private one.
I think I'll talk about the people who have been consistent and irreplaceable in my life.
First:
My mom, of course. I honestly thank God every day for my mom. I would be envious beyond belief if anyone else had my mom, but I was the one lucky enough to get her. I have such a good, open, honest, fun relationship with her... but at the same time, she knows when to be a parent and when to take a stand. I love her more than anything in this world and I couldn't imagine life without her. I hope she is happy and I hope she is not blind in love, I hope her husband is really everything she's always wanted and deserved... but I honestly think she jumped into a relationship too soon and i honestly doubt her happiness. She deserves so much more.
Second:
Sarah Howard. She is the only best friend I've ever had that I've never fought with, never doubted, and never lost contact with. Sure, it has been a while since I have seen her or actually spoken to her, but I know she is always there for me. She would always be there for me no matter what, and I will always be there for her too. Since day 1 of Fourth grade we've been best friends and I couldn't ask for a better best friend. She is me in a smaller, bigger-boobed form :) I love her so much and I hope she is so happy with her life right now. She also deserves the world and I wish I was a better best friend to her. I hope I get to see her soon because I miss her so much and I just want us to have more good times like the million memories we have together.
Third:
Paul Tucker. My very best guy friend. Although sometimes other emotions get in the way of our friendship, he too will always be there for me. I wouldn't have ever gotten through some of the times in my life without him. I hate when we go weeks without talking. I need him in my life as much as I need air and water. What did I do before I had him? I get excited thinking about calling him and talking to him, and I day dream about coming to Charlotte, well... now Miami, to see him and just running and jumping in his arms to hug him and not wanting to let go. I've given him every reason to hate me and to let me go, but he hasn't. He's strong and loyal and truly a genuine person. Some people never face in a lifetime what he faces in a week... but every time I talk to him he is still Paul Tucker; sarcastic, intelligent, and optimistic. I can't wait to see him again... I can't even wait to just talk to him again. The dream I had was like a wake up call, reminding me of how much I love and need him. Now i just want to wear my blue dress every day and pretend I'm waiting in his house for him to get home.
Fourth:
My sister Rebecca. She would be much higher up, had we always had the relationship we now have. I remember the years when we absolutely hated each other. But starting from that one Thanksgiving break my sophomore year, we've been so close and I could not ask for more in a person. She gets me more than anyone ever has. And we laugh more than i do with anyone. And we have the best times doing NOTHING, and so you can only imagine the times when we actually do SOMETHING. The best part about moving to Florida is being closer to her, that's probably the main reason i am moving. I love her and i love being around her and i can't wait to be with her again.
To pay respect to all those others who have definitely made impacts on my life:
My dad, who was not always the person he is now. Who i love so so so much and who i believe in sometimes more than myself. He is the first face that comes to mind when i pray for my loved ones, and i know he is strong and will pull himself out of this. I know he is confused and lost, but i also know that he is strong and determined and I'll stand beside any choice he makes.
Michael Floyd, Brittany Momah, Cortney, Vincent, Ashley Gross, Kierra Murphy, Undoland Hunter, and anyone else i missed.
I'm so ready for college. I'm ready to be studios. I'm ready to live with Mike and start over with him in a new place. I'm ready to work hard and feel accomplished. I'm ready to drop into bed exhausted, only to wake up and do it all again. I'm ready to crave boredom and to truly enjoy my vacation time. I'm ready to take weekend trips to Miami and Crestview. I'm ready to be closer to Charlotte, my home. I'm ready to see what the future has for me, and I'm ready to give the future what i have for it.
I think I'll talk about the people who have been consistent and irreplaceable in my life.
First:
My mom, of course. I honestly thank God every day for my mom. I would be envious beyond belief if anyone else had my mom, but I was the one lucky enough to get her. I have such a good, open, honest, fun relationship with her... but at the same time, she knows when to be a parent and when to take a stand. I love her more than anything in this world and I couldn't imagine life without her. I hope she is happy and I hope she is not blind in love, I hope her husband is really everything she's always wanted and deserved... but I honestly think she jumped into a relationship too soon and i honestly doubt her happiness. She deserves so much more.
Second:
Sarah Howard. She is the only best friend I've ever had that I've never fought with, never doubted, and never lost contact with. Sure, it has been a while since I have seen her or actually spoken to her, but I know she is always there for me. She would always be there for me no matter what, and I will always be there for her too. Since day 1 of Fourth grade we've been best friends and I couldn't ask for a better best friend. She is me in a smaller, bigger-boobed form :) I love her so much and I hope she is so happy with her life right now. She also deserves the world and I wish I was a better best friend to her. I hope I get to see her soon because I miss her so much and I just want us to have more good times like the million memories we have together.
Third:
Paul Tucker. My very best guy friend. Although sometimes other emotions get in the way of our friendship, he too will always be there for me. I wouldn't have ever gotten through some of the times in my life without him. I hate when we go weeks without talking. I need him in my life as much as I need air and water. What did I do before I had him? I get excited thinking about calling him and talking to him, and I day dream about coming to Charlotte, well... now Miami, to see him and just running and jumping in his arms to hug him and not wanting to let go. I've given him every reason to hate me and to let me go, but he hasn't. He's strong and loyal and truly a genuine person. Some people never face in a lifetime what he faces in a week... but every time I talk to him he is still Paul Tucker; sarcastic, intelligent, and optimistic. I can't wait to see him again... I can't even wait to just talk to him again. The dream I had was like a wake up call, reminding me of how much I love and need him. Now i just want to wear my blue dress every day and pretend I'm waiting in his house for him to get home.
Fourth:
My sister Rebecca. She would be much higher up, had we always had the relationship we now have. I remember the years when we absolutely hated each other. But starting from that one Thanksgiving break my sophomore year, we've been so close and I could not ask for more in a person. She gets me more than anyone ever has. And we laugh more than i do with anyone. And we have the best times doing NOTHING, and so you can only imagine the times when we actually do SOMETHING. The best part about moving to Florida is being closer to her, that's probably the main reason i am moving. I love her and i love being around her and i can't wait to be with her again.
To pay respect to all those others who have definitely made impacts on my life:
My dad, who was not always the person he is now. Who i love so so so much and who i believe in sometimes more than myself. He is the first face that comes to mind when i pray for my loved ones, and i know he is strong and will pull himself out of this. I know he is confused and lost, but i also know that he is strong and determined and I'll stand beside any choice he makes.
Michael Floyd, Brittany Momah, Cortney, Vincent, Ashley Gross, Kierra Murphy, Undoland Hunter, and anyone else i missed.
I'm so ready for college. I'm ready to be studios. I'm ready to live with Mike and start over with him in a new place. I'm ready to work hard and feel accomplished. I'm ready to drop into bed exhausted, only to wake up and do it all again. I'm ready to crave boredom and to truly enjoy my vacation time. I'm ready to take weekend trips to Miami and Crestview. I'm ready to be closer to Charlotte, my home. I'm ready to see what the future has for me, and I'm ready to give the future what i have for it.