lost in the crowd
do you ever feel lonley? Do you ever feel like people that you call friends are just behind your back, not really saying anything , but behind you...distant. I feel alone out here, and I dont want to talk to anyone. Ive brought this on myself really. Its boring, I have no friends here, and the people that I call friends make me feel more distant than any I know here. Here I am, back to the old lj, alone...Im just tired. Im tired of not being supported on anything I do. There is alwyas something someone has to say about it, or in my case, people dont say enough about it. Im going into the navy because I want to, because it is the best move that I can think about. Im working for gamestop because ive put enough of my life and blood into doing what I do. I work hard, I goof around here and there, but whats the point of working if your not happy....DAmmit, Im just pissed. Im pissed that everytime I try to talk to a friend, its like a hassle for them. Its not, how ya been, things goin ok, its...what you want, or need, or is there something I can help you with. I wish I could be someone else for a day, not the guy that did and said stupid ignorant shit, just to get noticed. Im never able to be myself, Im never able to be happy, why am I the stupid fucker in the group...Oh yeah, I remmeber why...that was what I chose, That was what I picked to get noticed for. We already had the smart guy, we already had the funny guy, the real guy, the one thats been everywhere, so it only seemed fit that we have someone we can make fun of and feel better about myself...but I love to watch people laugh, smile, even if it means pointing and laughing...who am i kidding, if it made someone laugh, id probably do anything moral for it.Ive got some of the best friends in the world...even if they do make me feel like an outcast...ehh, im going to go swimming and work out, mabey then i will feel better before work.