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Dec 14, 2004 19:28

i give up .. i found out from kat that john duznt lik me nemore n he duznt eva wna go back outt .. lik i realli just wna fkin diee .. i read the convo n ran upstairs cryingg .. lik y do guys hafta do this ? they just break a girl's heart n dont even caree .. i guess i wasnt fkin good enuff .. cuz i mean i didnt even do nething, hes the one who fkin cheated on me, he's the one who wanted to break up, i didnt do shyt to him ! i mean y me .. i love this kid soooo much no1 even gets it he's lik the first guy i eva realli loved n he's gonee .. i miss him soo much n i want him back but he fkin duznt want me n now i kno tht for suree .. i kno i sed b4 that i wanted to know for sure if he wanted to get back together or not cuz then i cud get overr him but i neva knew it was gonna hurt this bad .. now its gonna even be harder to get over him cuz he's all im gonna be thinking of .. ya kno i hope he falls in love with a girl, she cheats on him n breaks up with him n just completely breaks his heart cuz he realli needs to fkin kno how it feels .. n wut sux even moree is tht we're not even realli friends nemore .. lik we talk sometimes online but thts it .. i mean isnt that the least he can do, just be friends ? is tht realli to much to fkin askk .. u kno i have otha stuff going on otha than him but duz he caree or bother asking nooo .. i just wish everything was diff. or i neva went out with john or nething so i wudnt be going thru this .. i hate this soo much im fkin done with guys, im fkin done with john, im done with fkin everyone, im done wit falling in love or even liking guys im just fkin done ..
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