Aug 30, 2006 08:29
The last few weeks I have been going through some weird stuff. I feel like people are fighting for a peice of candy and competeing to see who is best then in the end when the battle is done it wont even matter any more.. I get the same story from all of them.. I just dont know what to believe. I dont know where to stand or lay for that matter.. Everyone wants answers to questions and I cant give them right now.. I just want to go out and have fun.. I feel like I have not lived my life to the fullest yet. I mean dont get me wrong I love him with all my heart and I have for a long long time but right now I just dont know when it will all end.. I feel sometimes like I have not laughed enough in my time.. I feel like more then half of my life is shedding tears and the only way for me to justifye it is makeing everyone around me smile.. I am so nice to people and I dont stand up for myself.. I sit back and just let people say what they want about me and I take it with a grain of salt. I am at the point where I dont want that to be the case anymore, I want to tell people what they can and cant say to me to make me feel the way I do.. I want to have a voice and I want to stop being afraid of other people and what they may think or do...
to be continued...