Life goes on and the best thing is to look forward.
I pretty much debated whether or not return to blogging and writing and such after yesterday’s post. I exceptionally thank everyone, who commented on my locked entry and showed their support to me and my family. It was a shaking experience and I guess everyone is reverting to their inner selves and mourn quietly. I haven’t contacted my friend yet to hear her, mainly because I don’t want to press her and deepen the wound. As far as I go, I did a rather unlikely thing in such a time and clung to life.
The night was planned as a party night in a bar and everything but after the depressing afternoon I doubted I would go. Yet I did to help numb the ill feelings and in a sense mark his passing with a style. He was always a lively person, who liked to be around friends and have fun, so it felt natural to do so. I was out at 4 am and had an enjoyable night with the support of my friends, tequila and live rock music. In a sense I still fear that going out that night might have been a mistake or a disrespectful act, but it helped me not go in a dark limbo.
We met the musicians, the guitarist was actually a family friend of my friend and it was quite cool to shake his hand, considering the magic it creates with strings. Then we met and swapped personal information with another dude we met the same night, who is a web designer slash singer-songwriter. I love meeting people of art in all mediums and singing has been my passion all this life. If I had the talent, I would have been on MTV by now, but alas I am as tone deaf as a goat.
I couldn’t concentrate on anything else today apart from reading and I caught up on an exciting serialized novel and read some comics and now will read some books and basically clear my mind with something. Tomorrow is a new week and I will try to organize myself and just push through.
The best thing I can do is live and get the most of it.