"I've been searching for a place of my own."

[dawnward]

Name: Riku
Fandom: Kingdom Hearts, Alternate Universe
Age: 25
Gender: Male
Appearance:

With glasses. Without glasses. These pictures are a little out of date; Riku has since gone up his last couple of inches.

Muscular and confident, he gives the impression of a warrior-scholar, which is not far off from the truth. Athletic, efficient, and precise, he has an economy of movement, carriage, and dress that belies a militaristic upbringing. This harshness is tempered by a much kinder, gentler approach to things unrelated to combat or conflict, with light handling and long stretches of comfortable silence, especially around close friends. He does like to talk, however, and can become extremely animated when discussing subjects of interest to him.

He hides his broad shoulders and strength underneath unassuming clothing and wears his long silver hair loose on most occasions, putting it up in hot weather. He's been considering cutting it, but has yet to bring himself to do it. He wears silver-rimmed glasses with small oval lenses at all times to compensate for extreme nearsightedness. The lenses are enchanted not to break and, at long last, he has come into possession of sturdy metal frames enchanted not to bend.

His body has its fair share of scars, primarily on his hands and arms, with very old, crisscrossing scars on his back, up near his shoulders. The freshest mark is just over his heart, a large, circular mass of stained skin roughly the size of his palm. There is also a tattoo on the back of his neck in the shape of a black Nobody symbol.

Personality:

Of the things that Riku shares with his canon counterpart, his stubbornness and his willingness to sacrifice his own well-being for others are perhaps the most unchanged. Determined, focused, and with a reoccurring tendency toward martyrdom, he can fit the "tormented loner" type pretty damn well most of the time. Or, more accurately, the stubborn big brother that takes too much weight on his shoulders because he thinks he has to do it all on his own, for their sakes.

But he's not all black cloaks and quick exits and idiot tendencies. Like most Rikus, he has an ego lurking behind his altruism, hidden envy for the people he admires, and that damn bad habit of trying to do too much himself both to spare people hardship and because he believes he's the only one who can take care of things (or, if his ego is stepping in, that he's the only one with the ability to do so). This can make most Rikus hard to get along with now and then, depending on who you are, and this one has the bonus superpower of being extra snooty due to extensive training and study. He doesn't necessarily mean to snob it up and will be genuinely surprised when it's pointed out to him, implying that for all his intelligence he's got his own set of personal blinders from time to time.

Although, it is in his experience and scholarly qualities that Riku begins to differentiate from his canon self. He is, essentially, a trained soldier and acts in a way as befitting a former high-class member of the Keyblader forces employed by the Organization prior to its defeat. He knows how to follow orders, analyze situations, and act in order to accomplish a goal as quickly as possible and as efficiently as possible. He has put these skills into practice, not only against Heartless and Nobodies, but against people and worlds as well. What he has done and the world he has lived in has given him a very harsh, realistic outlook on life and combat and the necessity of killing: he knows that it must be done, that sacrifices have to be made, and that the real hurdles come afterward, when the battle is over and there is no one left to fight and all you have for company is your memories.

That last understanding has only come to him recently, after years - or what felt like years - spent away from home have led, inevitably, to his return. Riku has learned to reflect and to try to understand, instead of simply absorbing facts and forcing them to fit into his plans and processes. He's growing up now, finally, and is gradually learning to look back at all that is happened without flinching and without denying any part of it, the good and the bad.

It's tough, but he's been able to remain very much himself, a kind, gentle, bookish, and polite young man, shy and sometimes easily flustered (sometimes more than sometimes), who is loyal to a fault and is willing and able to trust and open himself up to friends. He still enjoys cooking, reading, and can now indulge in a cup of warm tea just because, instead of as an outlet for his loneliness. What doubt and uncertainty remains is balanced by a firm, unwavering belief in possibilities, in the idea that even when things are darkest, there must be a way back to the light. He will fight for this, his faith in possibility, standing tall and strong against the most monstrous of enemies, not just in front of his friends but beside them, with them.

A realistic optimist, a nerd with dry humor and quick sarcasm hidden behind his not inconsiderable personal composure, a friend, an ally, a scholar and a fighter who works himself too hard and worries a little too much and who still doesn't quite know what to do with himself around pretty girls - that's Riku. Perhaps a bit more domestic than he used to be, if that is even possible; but there's something to be said of what it feels like to have a home and to care for it, to wake each day and know that your journey is over.

Riku can, at long last, rest easy, and so he's happy and personable and alright with himself.

Not a bad way to be, if you ask him.

History:

Original alternate universe history.

In the interim, sometime before returning home, Riku visited a curious pocket dimension of red corridors and questionable events. Though the place itself was not to his taste, some of his experiences there awakened in him desires he had denied or been entirely unaware of until that point. Slowly, primarily through encounters with a particular individual, Riku began to experience a very personal kind of awakening, one that he had been long denied due to self-imposed repression and the drive to serve the greater good while ignoring his own needs and growth.

Updated history, post-Crucible.

Very briefly, Riku returned to the universe that he had visited, but was torn away again soon after. He did not return home and so has no knowledge of what became of "himself" following the removal of his heart - in fact, he feared, deep in the secret parts of hismelf, that he had no heart at all. With no way to prove it to himself and with his Nobody making his presence known in the strange world that he now inhabited, Riku floundered and lived day-to-day, wondering when or if he would ever go home. The Sphere, as he came to understand it, was pleasant enough, filled with new friends and new experiences and, for a time, a new kind of freedom.

But no journey can end in the middle and there came a day when Riku left the Sphere for his own world, where only emptiness awaited him. But instead of coming home to his death, he found himself in a World of Darkness, where time had no meaning and his memories slipped in and out of his heart like the tides.

It was there, on that dark shore, that Sora came to him.

The battle was over, Sora said. They had won.

They had won.

Axel and Roxas had joined the resistance; Riku's terrifying Nobody had been defeated, then converted through Kairi's effort alone; Xurik had led them into the depths of Organization space; they had found Xemnas and Ansem the Wise and fought them both in the depths of the Nobody's home castle; the fabled Kingdom Hearts had emerged from mere legend to true threat, poised to unleash darkness and chaos upon the worlds; and Sora, who loved his friends and his island, had given his freedom so that he could lock the door from the other side.

And now he was there and they were together.

Riku had supposed, later, that he should have felt sorrow and despair in that moment, not just for himself but for the both of them, trapped as they were. But he felt only joy. For so long he had been afraid. For so long he had hidden from the future and from his darkness and locked his heart away so that no one around him could see his terror. For so long, he'd thought that all would be lost.

But it wasn't. It wasn't lost and there was joy in his heart, and in Sora's, and that joy opened the doorway home.

The Door to the Light opened for them and he had told Sora to go first. It wasn't his time yet, he knew. It would come, he promised, and it did, not long after. Riku wouldn't know of Sora's exhausted coma and Kairi's silent vigil until later, nor of Xurik's rock-steady guardianship of his princess and his ultimate decision regarding both their fates. Because the Nobody still existed after the final battle, he held Riku's own life in his hands, perhaps for the very first time.

When Riku woke on the beach of his home at long last, with Kairi beside him and her tears on his cheek, he knew at once what that decision had been.

He still thinks of Xurik from time to time. He's not sure, but he likes to imagine that he can feel him, sleeping deep in his heart.