(no subject)

[dawnshine]

Things are always changing. People change. Perspectives, seasons, time, fashion. Change is everywhere. Sometimes it's easy and little. Something you didn't really notice happening. Little lines around your eyes. Hair getting lighter after spending summer days outside. Sometimes it's change is a conscious decision. Diet after a break up. No more cigarettes. Whether change is for the better or not, it happens. And without quite knowing how to put what I feel into words, I want to remember my decision to change today. I want to surround myself with positive people by becoming a more positive person. I want positive people to gravitate toward me because we're similar, not because they want to fix me. I want to focus on all the things that are right in my life. And I want to feel free to celebrate those people who make my life better than it would be without them. Having decided that I want to feel free, I realized that I am free. That only my bowing to the perceived expectations of others will stop me from doing what makes me feel best. So why do it? Why not feel good and make others feel good, too? Because of someone's judgment? Because of someone else's sensibilities? I think I have finally matured enough to realize that this is it. This is my life. That I have so many wonderful people who make my life full and fantastic and amazing, but ultimately, it's all up to me to decide how things go for me. And that it's okay if my decisions don't make everyone else happy. Because making everyone else happy is not my job. My job is to be the best me I can. I think that in being the best me, it will follow that I will also become the best everything else I can. The best friend, sister, mother, daughter. Which isn't to say the perfect anything. Just as good as I can be. And I think the first step in all of that is to feel happy. So unhappy things? They need to go away. Stress? Not my friend. So the habits and decisions that cause stress are out of here. I think I have taken so much for granted even as I thought I was truly appreciative. I think maybe you can always have a greater appreciation. So here are ten things that I truly appreciate right now.

1. My family
2. My comfy bed. Hello sweet dreams.
3. Running water
4. The people who care about me
5. The people who appreciate my caring about them
6. Infectious laughter
7. Sunshine
8. Hugs
9. Nice neighbors
10. My life