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RobDude's "A Nerd's Guide to Getting Laid"
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If you are a nerd in junior high - it's okay, you are still young. Think like an investor, go for the long term. If you are fat, work out, if you are skinny work out. You'll find that girls are very shallow - especally the ones you'll want to get with. Join a sport, learn to play guitar (join a band if you can), and become obsessed with cars. Stay away from your computer!
If you are a nerd in high school - Okay, for starters; stop reading fark. Computer time is like a -5 to your coolness. Nothing makes high school kids cooler than drugs. Start hanging out with people that drink and smoke weed. Stop answering questions in class, never talk about your grades, and never do your homework. Join the football team, you'll have a 100 drinking buddies and about 99 of them will be way cooler than you. Eventually one of them will reject a chick and you can pick her up. If football doesn't work out - go hardcore emo. Emo chicks are easy and are demons in the sack.
If you are a nerd in college - Time is running out...here's what you do. Go to the bank, get out like $500 dollars. Then, go rush a frat. Yeah, that $500 dollars is going to buy you a solid semester or two of friendship. Sure, the first year or so you'll be somebody's biatch - they'll make you drink 'til you puke and you'll be carrying drinks around and working the door at the parties. But after that, you'll be golden. Over the next 5 or 6 years (trust me, you won't be passing many classes) you'll have plenty of time to hook up with drunk, incoming freshman girls. Just don't do anything stupid like join the 'Math Frat' or the 'Engineering Frat'. Find the frat whose members look most like the guys that beat you up in high school....then start acting like they do. Chicks love that sorta thing - don't buy into that whole 'respect' crap.
If you are a nerd after college - well, things might just start looking up for you. Hopefully, since you are a nerd and all, you've landed some decent job 50-60k or something to start. Of course you'll be working 45-50 hours a week so you won't have much time to chase the ladies. I'd recommend going after the economically challenged...to do this you'll need to appear to be a lot more well off than you are. Go buy a fancy car, and take down all of your nerd-related crap from your apartment. Go find one of the gay guys you work with (Attended one of those Respecting Diversity meetings - you'll find plenty of 'em). He can help you decorate and help you learn to dress yourself. Go to bars and stike up converstaions with lots of different girls. Aim for a 10% return rate. Yeah - for every 10 girls you talk to, if just *one* actually seems interested in you - that's a HUGE success. YOu should have no trouble hitting on 20 girls each weekend. It's all about the math..
-Z!(not mine)
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If you are a nerd in junior high - it's okay, you are still young. Think like an investor, go for the long term. If you are fat, work out, if you are skinny work out. You'll find that girls are very shallow - especally the ones you'll want to get with. Join a sport, learn to play guitar (join a band if you can), and become obsessed with cars. Stay away from your computer!
If you are a nerd in high school - Okay, for starters; stop reading fark. Computer time is like a -5 to your coolness. Nothing makes high school kids cooler than drugs. Start hanging out with people that drink and smoke weed. Stop answering questions in class, never talk about your grades, and never do your homework. Join the football team, you'll have a 100 drinking buddies and about 99 of them will be way cooler than you. Eventually one of them will reject a chick and you can pick her up. If football doesn't work out - go hardcore emo. Emo chicks are easy and are demons in the sack.
If you are a nerd in college - Time is running out...here's what you do. Go to the bank, get out like $500 dollars. Then, go rush a frat. Yeah, that $500 dollars is going to buy you a solid semester or two of friendship. Sure, the first year or so you'll be somebody's biatch - they'll make you drink 'til you puke and you'll be carrying drinks around and working the door at the parties. But after that, you'll be golden. Over the next 5 or 6 years (trust me, you won't be passing many classes) you'll have plenty of time to hook up with drunk, incoming freshman girls. Just don't do anything stupid like join the 'Math Frat' or the 'Engineering Frat'. Find the frat whose members look most like the guys that beat you up in high school....then start acting like they do. Chicks love that sorta thing - don't buy into that whole 'respect' crap.
If you are a nerd after college - well, things might just start looking up for you. Hopefully, since you are a nerd and all, you've landed some decent job 50-60k or something to start. Of course you'll be working 45-50 hours a week so you won't have much time to chase the ladies. I'd recommend going after the economically challenged...to do this you'll need to appear to be a lot more well off than you are. Go buy a fancy car, and take down all of your nerd-related crap from your apartment. Go find one of the gay guys you work with (Attended one of those Respecting Diversity meetings - you'll find plenty of 'em). He can help you decorate and help you learn to dress yourself. Go to bars and stike up converstaions with lots of different girls. Aim for a 10% return rate. Yeah - for every 10 girls you talk to, if just *one* actually seems interested in you - that's a HUGE success. YOu should have no trouble hitting on 20 girls each weekend. It's all about the math..
-Z!(not mine)