(no subject)
you know i stayed up most of the night trying to explain to raul that he has a mental problem. he asked why he has a hard time distinguishing the difference between fantasy and reality and i told him, a person without a mental issue wouldn't ask that question. there really isn't a "technique" it just happens. and i have known for a long time that he has that problem. every time he gets into a show or a movie he actually truelly believes that it is real. then when it finally does sink in that it isn't real, he gets all depressed. i still dont think that he fully comprehends everything that i told him. it, in my oppinion, was a waste of time to have this conversation with him. i just lost alot of sleep cuz we are still where we were like yesterday morning and that is no where.
so, my mom is in a bad situation right now. her light is about to be disconnected, she doesn't have money for rent, she is overdrawn in her accounts, and guess what here is some news; my brother isn't doing a god damn thing to help her!!! big surprize. so she asked to borrow some money yesterday. and i know that was a big deal for her. she wants to pawn off my dad's jewlery. yes my dad's jewlery!!! his pride possesion. i can't believe that she actually thought about it much less wants to do it. she has so much other crap that she could pawn. no only that but she has a son that could actually work for a living. there is a thought. it doesn't sound like a far fetched idea to me. i mean given that he can't maintain a job, but he could work at lots of different places and at least he would still be getting paid which is better then what is going on now. i just can't believe it. i want to cry and punch him at the same time. my mom has worked her ass off for us since we were kids. she shouldn't have to go through this. there is no reason for it. then again i see the fact that she is bringing it on herself by encouraging his laziness. i see that. but i can't let her live like this. so there goes cindy's bank open for buissiness. i feel like shit.
so, my mom is in a bad situation right now. her light is about to be disconnected, she doesn't have money for rent, she is overdrawn in her accounts, and guess what here is some news; my brother isn't doing a god damn thing to help her!!! big surprize. so she asked to borrow some money yesterday. and i know that was a big deal for her. she wants to pawn off my dad's jewlery. yes my dad's jewlery!!! his pride possesion. i can't believe that she actually thought about it much less wants to do it. she has so much other crap that she could pawn. no only that but she has a son that could actually work for a living. there is a thought. it doesn't sound like a far fetched idea to me. i mean given that he can't maintain a job, but he could work at lots of different places and at least he would still be getting paid which is better then what is going on now. i just can't believe it. i want to cry and punch him at the same time. my mom has worked her ass off for us since we were kids. she shouldn't have to go through this. there is no reason for it. then again i see the fact that she is bringing it on herself by encouraging his laziness. i see that. but i can't let her live like this. so there goes cindy's bank open for buissiness. i feel like shit.