Really?
12:49:36 AM Dave: Are you ever going to open up to me?
12:49:54 AM Meghan: .... no more than i have. ive told you that too
12:50:10 AM Dave: Then do you think I just put way more stock into this friendship than you did?
12:50:34 AM Meghan: i dont know what you mean by stock
12:51:08 AM Dave: I just feel like I cared the world about you, I worried about you all the time because as far as I thought we were like best friends
12:51:22 AM Meghan: then yes.
12:51:28 AM Meghan: i do think you did.
What the FUCK does that mean? Is that really the story of my life? That I just care about people more than they care about me. Because that would explain a lot about how people have treated me.
Seriously, should I just stop caring about people if they aren't going to care back? Or should I just stop expecting people to care about me the way I care about them?
This is just like Julie back in High School. I looked up to her, she was my idol and she meant the world to me. But I swear to god if I asked her the time of fucking day she wouldn't give it to me.
*sigh*
Meghan, if you ever read this, I am very upset because I loved you a lot, but you never seemed to love me and I just feel like that's the story of my life. You were the girl who taught me that "Don't waste your time on people who won't care about you" was a motto to live by. I guess it's true.
I have come to the conclusion that the hardest thing in life is finding people who actually care about you.
I'm finding out that number seems to dwindle more than it increases.
and I have officially listened to the song "lullabye" on repeat constantly for the past 24+ hours and it still hurts
I wish I could believe everything will be all right, but I am just going to do the same thing I always do when I get upset, and put on a fake smile and walk tall like nothing is wrong.
*tries to think positive*
Of course, I have Colleen, Kristen, Michelle to just vent at and talk to (especially when Michelle starts showing up online at 2AM again, god how I missed that)
Thank goodness I can look at people like Mary, Adam, Kyle and Kerri who I know will never turn their back on me. They say all you need is a friend and I have just named four of the best people on the planet.
[note: the order of this post was changed around after an edit to skew my emotional thought process, and also, Mary sent me texts that made me smile mid-post so my mood was lifted halfway through]
12:49:54 AM Meghan: .... no more than i have. ive told you that too
12:50:10 AM Dave: Then do you think I just put way more stock into this friendship than you did?
12:50:34 AM Meghan: i dont know what you mean by stock
12:51:08 AM Dave: I just feel like I cared the world about you, I worried about you all the time because as far as I thought we were like best friends
12:51:22 AM Meghan: then yes.
12:51:28 AM Meghan: i do think you did.
What the FUCK does that mean? Is that really the story of my life? That I just care about people more than they care about me. Because that would explain a lot about how people have treated me.
Seriously, should I just stop caring about people if they aren't going to care back? Or should I just stop expecting people to care about me the way I care about them?
This is just like Julie back in High School. I looked up to her, she was my idol and she meant the world to me. But I swear to god if I asked her the time of fucking day she wouldn't give it to me.
*sigh*
Meghan, if you ever read this, I am very upset because I loved you a lot, but you never seemed to love me and I just feel like that's the story of my life. You were the girl who taught me that "Don't waste your time on people who won't care about you" was a motto to live by. I guess it's true.
I have come to the conclusion that the hardest thing in life is finding people who actually care about you.
I'm finding out that number seems to dwindle more than it increases.
and I have officially listened to the song "lullabye" on repeat constantly for the past 24+ hours and it still hurts
I wish I could believe everything will be all right, but I am just going to do the same thing I always do when I get upset, and put on a fake smile and walk tall like nothing is wrong.
*tries to think positive*
Of course, I have Colleen, Kristen, Michelle to just vent at and talk to (especially when Michelle starts showing up online at 2AM again, god how I missed that)
Thank goodness I can look at people like Mary, Adam, Kyle and Kerri who I know will never turn their back on me. They say all you need is a friend and I have just named four of the best people on the planet.
[note: the order of this post was changed around after an edit to skew my emotional thought process, and also, Mary sent me texts that made me smile mid-post so my mood was lifted halfway through]