Crime and Punishment in Suburbia (RP for starspangledcap)

[daughter_of_m]

Wanda hadn't been in the United States is some time. She'd lived in New York and California and traveled back and forth for all her years as an Avenger but she still felt like a small town European girl; and even the relatively suburban atmosphere of the mall in Minnesota made her feel jittery. Or maybe it was why she was here

Comments

[starspangledcap]

Steve left the Hot Topic without looking back, a raw feeling in his chest. He knew, if he did, that he would do something he would regret. Like telling Sally the truth, or breaking down completely. Neither would result in anything good, for either of them

[daughter_of_m]

Wanda followed Steve as he left the store and wandered seemingly aimlessly away. He was clearly upset and didn't notice her. She wasn't entirely sure what she'd say to him...wasn't entirely sure why she'd come. It just...needed to be done.

She walked carefully and quietly, but determinedly up to the bench. She stood silently behind him for a moment; took in his altered appearance and the sad slump of his shoulders. She reached tentatively out and placed a hand beside him, not quite touching.

"She looks well," she said, softly.

[starspangledcap]

Steve looked up at the sound of the familiar voice. "Wanda? How did you...?"

But, really, Steve knew the question was pointless. Powers or no powers, Wanda would always find a way to do what she wanted to do. It was simply her nature.

Steve stared hard at her, squaring his jaw, and revised his question. "What are you doing here?"

[daughter_of_m]

Wanda walked slowly around the bench and sat beside him.

"I'm not sure," she answered, truthfully. "I had to see you." She looked away, watched the people in the mall - normal people with normal lives and no inkling of who she or the man beside her were. "I think..." She looked down.

"I think I came to say goodbye."

[starspangledcap]

Steve didn't look at Wanda as he spoke, directing his gaze instead to the rust-colored linoleum of the mall floor.

"I already said goodbye to you, Wanda." It wasn't exactly the truth, of course. Steve had left the cottage that morning without waking her up. But what more could she possibly have to say to him? What could have brought her all the way across the world? Couldn't he get any peace?

"You still don't understand, do you? What you've done to us?"

[daughter_of_m]

Wanda sighed.

"You didn't. None of you did. You simply left." She raised her head to meet his eyes but he was looking determinedly away.

"No." She spoke in a different voice. "Why don't you explain it to me?"

[starspangledcap]

Explain?

"You were watching back there. I shouldn't have to explain. You let Sally live, and I'm thankful for that, but she's never going to be my child. She's never going to really know me. How do you think that makes me feel?" Steve clutched the t-shirt in two hands, nearly tearing the fabric with his short nails. He could feel his anger level rising, but he kept his voice low to avoid attracting attention from the mall crowd.

"Back in Wundagore, in your kitchen, you said you loved me. But I don't believe that you understand what that word means. Because you don't do this" - his voice breaks on the word - "to someone you love."

[daughter_of_m]

Wanda stared straight ahead, her eyes wide open, fixed on a point no one else could see.

"I know exactly how you feel." Her voice was quiet and low but fraught with pain and anger. Wanda was torn in two. Some part of her wanted to scream at him - to point out the hypocrisy inherent in his words and in fact in his reaction. She wanted to rip him to shreds right here in the mall.

And another part of her wanted to beg his forgiveness, to explain how desperate she'd been since he'd left her mountain, how confused and lost and lonely. To throw herself on his mercy, ask him to save her or kill her or just do something so she could feel again.

She sat, immobile, unable to decide who to be. "You're right. I don't understand. I don't understand at all."

[starspangledcap]

Steve looked over at Wanda for the first time since she'd sat down. She looked almost frozen, somehow. Frozen and wounded. She was still so thin, and pale. Steve had no idea what to do with her.

Of course she knew how he felt. This was a woman who had had her children taken away from her - erased from existence, at least for awhile. But if she knew how that felt, why would she bring that pain on her friends? Why would she do that to the people who had tried to help her, who had brought those children back to her?

"We were Avengers, Wanda," Steve said, trying to articulate his thoughts. "But we weren't revengers. I know you've been hurt before, and I'm sorry. But there's no excuse for what you've done. If you knew how this felt, why would you ever want to make anyone else feel it?"

[daughter_of_m]

"I didn't." Wanda was tired of explaining this. It never seemed to work. "I wanted you to feel happy, to have your daughter and your family and your perfect little life." She was starting to grow angry and in her present state of mind anger was very dangerous. She turned to Steve with wild eyes.

"No excuse? Well, you're full of excuses. 'We were Avengers' - what's that supposed to mean? Tony pulled that on me, too. At least you used the past tense." She threw back her hair, gaining confidence as she spoke. "Am I meant to feel loyalty? Or is it a signal that I can trust you? If so, it's not a very good one."

"Tony wants to know where I am so he can send Jan or Carol after me. I don't want to see them." She glanced away. "I was thinking of joining the Brotherhood, if they'll have me. I've no powers but I sort of have an in. But Pietro and Lorna are gaining up on me - they went so far as to go where Jean is. Trying to use her to reign me in." She turned back to Steve once more

[starspangledcap]

"Wanda..." Steve raised a hand to his forehead, rubbing his temples. What was he supposed to do, here? What was Wanda doing, following him like this. What did she want from him?

"I reminded you about the Avengers because that's the person I know you can be. It has nothing to do with loyalty or trust. It has to do with living up to your potential. You're better than the Brotherhood; you always have been. That's why you left to begin with. But you can't..."

Steve shook his head, looking down. "You can't seem to understand that..." But there was no use explaining. If Wanda didn't understand by now that changing the entire world on a whim was wrong, she wasn't ever going to.

He changed tactics, touching her arm. "Why don't you go to your brother and sister? They care about you. They can help you."

[daughter_of_m]

She looked down at his fingers touching her arm. Gentle. Hesitant. Bare.

"People keep telling me that. That I'm better. Better than who I've been." She took his hand in both her smaller ones. She looked up to meet his eyes.

"I meant to give you back your gloves but I've decided to keep them. To remind me." Tears welled but did not fall. "I came to say goodbye. When you next see me...I will understand. And I think that will make me...better."

"Goodbye...Steve." She leaned in quickly before he could move and kissed his cheek.

And she was gone, walking away, and not looking back.

[starspangledcap]

"Wanda!" Steve called, standing up, but she was already several feet away, and she didn't turn around. "Goodbye..." he whispered, watching her receding form.

He hoped she would follow his advice, hoped she would board a plane to Paris and find Lorna and Pietro. He hoped her siblings could help her like he and Jean and Tony had failed to do. He hoped, more than anything, that she would get better. As many mistakes as she'd made, she still deserved a second chance.

Just like he'd gotten. Just like Sally had gotten.

Steve put the t-shirt back into his pocket and headed for the mall's main entrance. He'd seen Sally; he'd seen Wanda. He had all the closure he was likely to get. And now, it was time to get back on a plane of his own and really start his new life.