To meet or not to meet?

[stolen_valkyrie]

So out of boredom, and just to see what was out there, I joined a free online dating site (okcupid.com) and started looking around. I found a guy who is 20 (I'm 19), and who lives not too far away. We've been sending a few messages, and hitting it off pretty well

Comments

[jennyelfenmass]

I like to suggest meeting within 2-3 weeks of starting to chat if they are local mostly because you might as well know sooner than spend lots of time and energy on someone you can't get along with in person.

Otherwise, same rules as with any off-line first meeting:
1) tell someone where you are going
2) meet in a public space (and stay in one for the duration of the meet-up)
3) have your own transportation there and back
4) carry a cell phone
5) wear clothing and shoes you can move easily in

[sidekicknomore]

I also second the cautionary rules. I'd even add bring a friend just in case.

[zinnea]

Totally agreed.

Also, I'd like to add that while you're smart to be cautious, being paranoid won't help you one bit. People you meet online aren't any more or less likely to be creeps or jerks than the people you meet anywhere else. Just use good common sense, don't take any risks you aren't comfortable with, and have a good time.

[jennyelfenmass]

Yeah, I forgot to add, trust your instincts. If things feel happy, yay, if things feel off, trust that instinct too.

[sidekicknomore]

First, Icon love.

I've never done the online thing so take my advice with a grain of salt.

I'd meet up with him. Sure getting to know someone and chatting and talking on the phone are great, especially if you two hit it off, but meeting a person face to face is a whole different ball game. There are guys I know online that a sweet, romantic, funny, awesome all around guys... but when we hang out at conventions or other places they are very.... not that way. LOL

I'd say meet up, if you don't like him in person at least you can become friends.

[inthealleyway]

i haven't been in that situation
but i'd bring up a meeting in a few days
if he's so nice and such
go for it

[bubblytoes28]

how long has it been?

[ifeelemo]

Play it by ear and see if the topic of meeting naturally comes up. If not, and you really want to meet, throw it out there. I agree with the poster above, it is useful to know earlier rather than later if this is someone that face to face you get along with as well as online. Be smart about things regarding your safety and where and when to meet and things of that nature.