non-canon ddd rl: tea time

[data_stabber]

Asakura had such little time to herself these days.  Being under the Data Entity's lock and key made it hard to enjoy yourself, but her master had convinced them of her good behavior.  She received her humble reward of twenty-four hours without their intrusion quite happily.  There were plenty of things she could think do, but one in particular...

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[stripping]

...This was not the place Issei had meant to go to. This was supposed to be his room. His room did not have tea in preparation, and his room did not have Asakura in it except in his worst nightmares.

"Whatisgoingon?!"

Pronouncing words clearly was for calm people.

[data_stabber]

It's a good thing he's so calm, then! Asakura clapped her hands in delight and squealed his name, rushing towards him to grab his wrists. "It's so good to see you again, Ryodo-san! Please come sit down; the tea's almost ready. I'm sorry it wasn't prepared when you arrived, but I hope it'll be worth the wait."

[stripping]

"...What..." Issei swallowed hard, trying to clear his throat or whatever meant that he couldn't breathe. No, it was probably just fear that was keeping him in total paralysis.

Meaning that he was just staring dumbly at her.

[data_stabber]

She cooed, "Human fear makes you all so inept. How can you ever expect to enjoy our visit if you can't even talk? Come on, come on." Directing him to his seat at the table was easier than she expected (screaming, shouting, fighting back, calling for help). How auspicious.

"Make yourself at home. And don't worry," Asakura assured, "no one even knows you're gone."

[stripping]

Finally he snapped back to his senses. "That is not even remotely assuring - woman! What is it that you're planning! I cannot believe that your goals are only tea!"

[data_stabber]

"What else would I have to gain? The Entity remains displeased with my actions regarding Suzumiya-san and I am stripped of a physical presence. You are not important in any way to gaining a second chance." She was often blunt to the point of cruel, but at least she was somewhat polite. Not that being cruel was bothersome. Humans needed to hear the absolute truth once in a while.

[stripping]

"Gah... Then why would you want to have tea with me at all?"

He wasn't exactly fond of her, and that meant that he would be remarkably unpleasant to spend time with.

[data_stabber]

"Because I want to spend time with you," she said, frowning. "We haven't seen each other for a quite a while, and I like to think we were once friends. Don't friends check up on one another?"

[stripping]

"Do you not remember killing me?!"

Don't snap. She could do it again. Don't scream at her.

[data_stabber]

Asakura seemed genuinely confused by his outburst. "Why wouldn't I? The funny thing is that you weren't even my target. How silly of you to get in the way." She giggled from the fond nostalgia of it all. "You wouldn't have died if you had just left well enough alone."

[stripping]

"But Karen still would have. Could you really think that I would allow that while I lived? How incredibly stupid must you be?"

[data_stabber]

"Stupid enough to believe you'd realize a fool's errand."

[stripping]

"She is my dear friend. I could not stand by and watch you kill her!"

[data_stabber]

"I see. Then your decision was based on attachment. Foolishness upon foolishness. Oh, well. What else can one expect from humans?" The tea kettle whistled, and Asakura hurried to grab it while other necessary objects needed for successful tea with a friend appeared on the table of their own accord. Being a data manipulator did come in handy most days. She returned with pot in hand.

"Would you like green tea or black tea, Ryudo-san?"

[stripping]

"Kelp."

Not that that would stop her.

[data_stabber]

Like anything but Yuki Nagato stopped her.

"Green it is." She prepares their cups and sits opposite Issei once she's finished. "Now. How are you doing? We've been so busy catching up that we haven't had time to discuss personal lives!"