Something bugging me...
There was this guy I met in Ragnarok Online many years ago. We played together, chatted, mailed, phoned and even met. Each of us mentally hurt and we could understand each other in every way... we've been soulmates. He was the only one that knew everything about me and was there for me in the darkest hours.
But then he started to take drugs and we always got into fight because of this. I hate drugs and told him to stop and everything... but he always brought the subject back. When the fight got really big we suddenly did not hear from each other again...
I was always so sad about this and it's still bugging me.
And then I saw this documentary about suicide and the boy that killed himself looked so dmn similar to him I nearly cried. Thankfully it wasn't him. But since I saw this documentary he's always in my mind and I'm so sad I don't have his phone number or eMail. Couldn't find him through his real name. I asked a acquaintance of us if she still has contact with him and she told me he's more or less fine. I asked her to tell him he may contact me if he will but nothing since then.
I feel so sorry for what happened... I should have helped him instead of this and I too would have needed him many times since then.
I'm writing this because I again dreamed of him this night and I just don't know what to do. All I want is to apologize...
Zelas
