Eight years later, I'm still wondering what I could do for nchanter

[darxus]

The last, best advice I got, years ago, was to never speak to her again. So I continue to do that

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Telling my tale

[sweetmmeblue]

DrWex and I met because of a, now, ex-bf. He behaved badly. Not physically abusive levels but emotionally. After we broke up I had nothing to do with him but still held really stressed feelings. Three years ago I saw him at a con and kinda freaked out he was there. I was still ANGRY! I ignored him. Made a point of getting eye contact and then walking away. Over the intervening year before the next con I decided I wanted to be the bigger person and deal with my stuff and decided that if there were interactions I'd work on being ok with them. The first couple of comments between us were tense. But Saturday night he asked if we could talk. He sat down and apologized. He showed me how he'd changed and what led him to understand how he treated me was wrong. Last year we got to talk more normally and I feel that things are resolved. Had this happened before I'd gone to grad school, or before I made the decision I wanted to resolve all my trauma stuff I would not have been receptive to him.

There may come a time when you can have this resolution. However, it means waiting. Thank you for sharing your document. That's a lot to think about.