(no subject)
wow this week has sucked mostly.
im leaving for New Jersey tomorrow. then New York on Sunday. ANd i'll be back Tuesday.
miss me?
Okay here's the deal: I"m not mad with your choices. Okay fine, you want to pick him over me. That's okay. But I dont like your assumption that everything's the same. Its not. And im not sad about it. I've learned to adapt and get closer to someone else. I just feel like you aren't aware of what's going on. Once you have time for me again, we'll get closer again im sure. But, for now, things ARE different.
dont worry. those ones aren't lyrics. lol.
I think I have an anxiety disorder. I get freaked out and sick to my stomach when people get too close to me. physically. and then anxious when things are put on hold. like stopping at a stop light, i flipped out. or when my mom didn't get off the phone so i could leave and not just stand around. and then having 8 different kids getting my attention all at once. I get sick to my stomach and feel like if i snapped...it'd be violently.
i dont want to snap.
but my parents aren't taking me seriously. I tell them i feel nervous. and anxious. and stressed. and violated when touched.
my dad replies by touching me. over and over again. asking if that makes me sick.
so i walked away.
what good is tomorrow without a garuntee?
im leaving for New Jersey tomorrow. then New York on Sunday. ANd i'll be back Tuesday.
miss me?
Okay here's the deal: I"m not mad with your choices. Okay fine, you want to pick him over me. That's okay. But I dont like your assumption that everything's the same. Its not. And im not sad about it. I've learned to adapt and get closer to someone else. I just feel like you aren't aware of what's going on. Once you have time for me again, we'll get closer again im sure. But, for now, things ARE different.
dont worry. those ones aren't lyrics. lol.
I think I have an anxiety disorder. I get freaked out and sick to my stomach when people get too close to me. physically. and then anxious when things are put on hold. like stopping at a stop light, i flipped out. or when my mom didn't get off the phone so i could leave and not just stand around. and then having 8 different kids getting my attention all at once. I get sick to my stomach and feel like if i snapped...it'd be violently.
i dont want to snap.
but my parents aren't taking me seriously. I tell them i feel nervous. and anxious. and stressed. and violated when touched.
my dad replies by touching me. over and over again. asking if that makes me sick.
so i walked away.
what good is tomorrow without a garuntee?