Henceforth, mostly friends-only posts here.

[darthmaus]

Henceforth, posts containing only memes, movie reviews, links, jokes, babbling about Magic cards etc will not be friends-locked, but everything that's even remotely personal will be.

I'm not taking anybody off my friends list or anything like that, no worries there. No need to do anything if you already read and post in my journal, and I in yours. However, if you aren't already on my friends list, but want to be:

• If I know you in meatspace, please post a comment telling me your real name and/or where I know you from (if it's not obvious from your journal) and I'll probably add you.
  
• If you stumbled across me online and we haven't met in real life, post here and tell me how you found me. I can't guarantee that I'll add you but I am open to making new friends, online and in the Big Blue Room!

I'm disturbed to hear through the grapevine that people who are NOT on my friends list are under the impression that everything they see on my heavily filtered journal is somehow a complete picture of what's on my mind and what I'm sharing with others. You know, even without filtering and friends-locking, my LJ is certainly not a complete picture of what's going on in my life and in my head, and if I don't post something, or don't post it publicly, it's because I don't think it's an appropriate forum for doing so. I'm well aware of the fact that some people use LJ as a completely public diary, and that's their prerogative (although I think it's pretty tacky and inconsiderate to violate the privacy of others in the process), but it's also my prerogative to not do so.

Deciding what to share on LJ and what to keep for more private discussions with friends (preferably somewhere comfortable and with a nice hot pot of tea) does not mean I am being inauthentic or deliberately presenting a polished view of myself for the world. Anyone who thinks they can really know someone just by reading their LJ is setting themselves up for disappointment, and honestly I do question the wisdom of sharing every little personal detail in an unprotected online forum as if this thing was a diary.

I'm a very open person, and if someone who cares about me and has my best interests at heart wants to discuss stuff that's going on in my personal life, I'm generally very willing to share. But I do have some people shut out on purpose, because they seem to only want to use my personal information, my crises and hardships (they don't seem to care too much about my happiness and achievements), for their own bizarre personal agendas. I don't make personal information about my life and my relationships available to such people because, frankly, it's none of their fucking business.

It saddens me that I have to do so. But there it is, and I feel a little safer now.