Passive Agressive Bullshit
Something that really pisses me off is passive aggressive bullshit. This is when someone won't come right out and tell you that they don't want hang out with you anymore or they don't really consider you a friend, but instead of just telling you this they do things like do stuff with the rest of your friends without telling you, or maybe they try to ignore you when you are there, stuff like that. Essentially even though they don't like you they don't want to upset you, so they tend to lead you on and just hope you "get the hint" on your own. For the past couple of years I have been feeling very down on myself. This is somethign I am trying to deal with, but I've realized alot of the people I thought were my "friends" weren't really helping and were even contributing to it. A few eyars ago when my so called "friends" were still in school they seemed to have some really good jobs working for the school. Well I would have liked a good job too but was always being told that they weren't hiring. Then my "friends" moved to another place or were looking. I tried to see if they would get a place that had another room that maybe I could get in on. "dude, you don't want to move out of college park, the traffic sucks, just stay there" whatever I was like it's expensive I don't care. Now I know I used to be a bit of a mooch but honestly I never fucking lived with any of these people before and it's been years and I've grown up a little. Anyway things like this made me feel like "gee there IS something wrong with me" and "These people don't want to live with me, so no one does, I am an awful person" Wouldn't I feel the same if they just came out and said it. Maybe, but at least I could move on and find some new friends and not think I'm paranoid for thinking no one likes me. Anyway some of these "friends" work at a company and make some good money. This company is hiring now. They have got to know I'm looking for a job as I am always telling these people that if they are hiring let me know. I guess they don't want to work with me either. Now that I'm feeling better I know it is their problem and not me. I don't need people who have such a low opinion of me. One of them said "I'm not sure it is a good place for you, we work all day and there are no breaks or [something else, I can't remeber the word she used]" And I was like "And... why would you you are working?" One of these people is even doing the interviews and he's like "well you can submit a resume but you will need to go through the formal process" That's all fine and good except low and behold, my old roomate works there, all his roomates work there, basically everyone who lived on my floor freshmen year works there( well just about) except for me. Which basically says to me they've vouched for everyone else they won't do it for me. Well fuck them. Also one of their roomated moved out, they NEED a new roomate or they will have to move. Of course no one messaged me to say this. I was just randomly reading AIM profiles and I come across the message. Of course I send some IMs saying that I'm still interested, but they all seem to be being ignored. And anytime I bring up that none of them have EVER lived with me I get, well he's heard rumors, whatever fuck them. Just come out and say No I don't want to live with you, not even to give you a chance, that way I know I should just stop associating with you and that you aren't a friend.