Helping a Friend Make a Huge Decision
My roommate E-- told me that she found out she's pregnant. I was shocked that she came to me but honored. She said she was excited and happy but at the same time scared to death because her boyfriend seemed really, not upset, but confused. He "needed time to think". Which we could both understand. It's a big deal but then he came back and said that she should get an abortion because he didn't want to have a kid. Can you believe that! He was basically telling her that no matter how she felt about it she should get an abortion or he wouldn't stick around. At first she was willing to go along with it saying that he thought she wasn't ready for it but she seemed so depressed. Like she thought it was the only option. I told her to stop and think a second. "What do you want?" I asked. "Don't think about what he wants, or what other people expect of you, think about how you feel about this and how you want to handle it." She looked at me and answered "I want to keep the baby I'm just scared of doing it alone, financially I'm not prepared." I explained to her that there were plenty of organizations that helped people in her same condition and that if she really wanted this child then she should at least look at all her options before making a decision. She's only about a month pregnant. I told her it was her decision though, that she could take my advice but in the end she had to choose what was best for her. I offered my help to find information about different programs that could help her so she didn't have to do it all on her own. She has enough on her mind already and she hasn't ever had to look for that kind of help so she's at a loss. Today she's going in for an ultra sound and she said she'll go from there. I think she's already decided though, I'm just not sure what that decision is. Do you think I gave her the right advice? I didn't want her to think that she should keep the baby just because I was telling her this stuff which I think I made clear. I just want her to be happy with the choice she makes and not regret it later.