Random questions
dorianegray has asked me seven random and somewhat interesting questions. If anyone would like me to give them some questions of their own, shout up.
1. Some weird power has picked you up and plunked you down in a book, in the world of which you will spend the rest of your life. What book is it, and what (if anything) will you do that changes its storyline?
Oh, excellent question. Tempting though it would be to say something historical, I suspect that if I were actually plonked down with Elizabeth Bennet or D'Artagnan I wouldn't survive long, considering the advances in health care and hygiene that have happened since those times. (Jane Austen herself only made it to my current age). So I shall say A Civil Campaign by Lois McMaster Bujold. While it isn't my favourite of the series it is one of the more fun ones, and the least life-threatening to the characters so I'd have a much better chance of surviving past the last chapter! On the whole I'd leave the storyline much as it is (though obviously being sufficiently instrumental in helping to bring about the general outcome that I end up friends with all the good characters and definitely in the aristocracy rather than one of the plebs) since on the whole the good end happily and the bad unhappily. The only major change would be ensnaring Ivan Vorpatril, who by this time has grown up sufficiently to be interesting partner material. (If I fail with him I'll make a pass at Byerly, who would also be rather interesting. Either that or I'll write out Olivia Koudelka and go off with Lord Dono).
2. When you were 15, what did you think you were going to be when you grew up? If this isn't what you are now, why not?
I genuinely never had an answer to what will you be when you grow up.* At 15 my plan was to do O Levels, stay on at school and do A Levels, then go to University and get a degree. I didn't have any plan past that. I probably thought I'd carry on working in whatever my degree was, maybe research in something sciency, but nothing more concrete than that. Since this isn't what I am now, I suspect the reason is largely that I didn't have the drive or will to actually do that.
Either that or I probably thought I might be a teacher. Since pretty much my entire family were teachers (as were most of their friends. Teachers are like that), I didn't really have any adult role models with any other jobs that I could aspire to, so it seemed like something normal to be. Reasons why not - I turned down a place on a PGCE course** because I decided I definitely didn't want to be a teacher, even though I had no idea what I did want to be. If I had become one, I'd have been about fifth-generation teacher.
*Still don't.
**Which I'd applied for in lieu of any other plan, partly in order to stay as a student and not have to think about it for another year
3. We have two mutual Facebook friends, neither of whom knows the other. How do you know them?
Helen and I met on a two-week-long residential arts summer school in Derbyshire, just after I took my O Levels. We got on well, and became pen pals for a while afterwards. We also shared the same surname, which we thought was highly risible. We lost touch after a few years, but then 'met' up again on the Girlsown mailing list. Then lost touch again, and 'met' again on LJ. We've now worked out that we're obviously destined to keep virtually bumping into each other, though actually we've never met in the flesh since that first two weeks.
Russ I know through the Hitch-Hiker's Guide To The Galaxy fan club, ZZ9 Plural Z Alpha. He was as a result another pen pal for a while (I tended to have about twenty pen pals at any one time back then. LiveJournal and FaceBook hadn't been invented). Haven't seen him for a good few years, which is a great shame.
4. What three things could you not live without?
Leaving aside physical necessities like food, sleep, air and so on, there's nothing I absolutely couldn't survive without. It's amazing what you can get used to if you have to, however awful. On the other hand that's a really boring answer to a good question, so I shall interpret it as three things that enrich my life and I would really really hate to have to do without.
BBC Radio. Specifically Radio 4, though if I absolutely couldn't have that then The World Service will do instead. (I can happily manage without all the music channels though)
Tea. OK, given the choice I'd give this up before I'd give up Radio 4, as there's plenty of alternatives, but I'd really prefer not to.
Written personal communication. As mentioned above, pre-internet I used to write letters to lots of people, even ones who I saw regularly (for a few weeks I and a classmate wrote to each other every day, hand-delivering the letters). Now I rarely write physical letters, but I still have one 'pen pal' by email, plus communicating with people on FB, LJ and the like.
5. What three things do you really wish no-one had ever invented?
The fashion industry. I just don't get fashion, and never have. Can't do it, can't get interested in it. I'm all for people looking nice and wearing beautiful things, but the fashion industry appears to be nothing to do with looking nice and all about trying to cram yourself into things that only look good on tall skinny adolescent boys. It's quite possible to have clothes that are unfashionable but beautiful, or unbeautiful but fashionable. Since my awareness of my own clothing or style rarely gets past "I'm not naked", I really can't do fashion, and I don't see why I should bother. However fashionable low-cut jeans are, I still want to have trousers that cover my underwear thankyouverymuch. And that have pockets, and just bloody fit. If you look good in a mini-skirt you should feel happy about wearing one, not be worrying whether actually A-line or ankle length is "in" this season and you'll look "so last year". If you like ruffles and look good in ruffles then wear ruffles; if ruffles make you look like a cheap box of chocolates then leave well alone, however fashionable they currently are.
The apostrophe. This may sound odd, since I happily I use apostrophes when appropriate (largely correctly, unless my typing's gone wrong or I'm having a very bad day) and am careful about their placement, but it DRIVES ME NUTS when they're used wrongly. I'd rather see one missed out when it should be there than put in unnecessarily. It appears that to most people apostrophes have ceased to mean contractions or possessives and now mean "holy shit here comes an S!" If they'd never existed I wouldn't be annoyed by idiots putting them in all over the place where they're simply wrong.
Celery. OK, it's not really an invention, so I shall amend that to the concept of putting celery in food. Or the idea of celery being food. Or any recipe that contains celery. Celery is evil. It lurks behind nice ingredients, ready to jump out and surprise you. There's nothing like chomping into a tasty sandwich, with salad bits and dressings and all good stuff, and suddenly encountering that crunch followed by the ghastly taste that infects all surrounding flavours with undeniable celeryness. My mum, who otherwise was a perfectly sane and reasonable woman, used to put celery in stews. When I complained about it she told me to pick the bits of celery out, which is like complaining about someone pissing in the swimming pool and being told to only swim in the non-pissy bits.
I may be overreacting here, and I'm sure celery has many nutritional benefits. I'm even - grudgingly - willing to admit that there might be some misguided folk who like the taste. But I'm happy to despotically deny them their celery fix if it would ensure that I never have to be ambushed by a bit of celery ever again.
6. You can have any vehicle you like, real or fictional. What do you choose and why?
Oh, that's an easy one. The Tardis! Do I need to explain?
Though I'd like it to come with The Doctor as a chauffeur and general tour guide please.
7. There is a major gig in Central Park. Dinosaurs appear and eat the headline act. Who has become dino-lunch?
I'm assuming this means which act would I like to see eaten by dinosaurs.
To please Number One Niece I shall say Justin Bieber, then she won't have to run out of the room to be sick whenever she hears him. If we're lucky they'll then go on the rampage and trample Coldplay as well.
1. Some weird power has picked you up and plunked you down in a book, in the world of which you will spend the rest of your life. What book is it, and what (if anything) will you do that changes its storyline?
Oh, excellent question. Tempting though it would be to say something historical, I suspect that if I were actually plonked down with Elizabeth Bennet or D'Artagnan I wouldn't survive long, considering the advances in health care and hygiene that have happened since those times. (Jane Austen herself only made it to my current age). So I shall say A Civil Campaign by Lois McMaster Bujold. While it isn't my favourite of the series it is one of the more fun ones, and the least life-threatening to the characters so I'd have a much better chance of surviving past the last chapter! On the whole I'd leave the storyline much as it is (though obviously being sufficiently instrumental in helping to bring about the general outcome that I end up friends with all the good characters and definitely in the aristocracy rather than one of the plebs) since on the whole the good end happily and the bad unhappily. The only major change would be ensnaring Ivan Vorpatril, who by this time has grown up sufficiently to be interesting partner material. (If I fail with him I'll make a pass at Byerly, who would also be rather interesting. Either that or I'll write out Olivia Koudelka and go off with Lord Dono).
2. When you were 15, what did you think you were going to be when you grew up? If this isn't what you are now, why not?
I genuinely never had an answer to what will you be when you grow up.* At 15 my plan was to do O Levels, stay on at school and do A Levels, then go to University and get a degree. I didn't have any plan past that. I probably thought I'd carry on working in whatever my degree was, maybe research in something sciency, but nothing more concrete than that. Since this isn't what I am now, I suspect the reason is largely that I didn't have the drive or will to actually do that.
Either that or I probably thought I might be a teacher. Since pretty much my entire family were teachers (as were most of their friends. Teachers are like that), I didn't really have any adult role models with any other jobs that I could aspire to, so it seemed like something normal to be. Reasons why not - I turned down a place on a PGCE course** because I decided I definitely didn't want to be a teacher, even though I had no idea what I did want to be. If I had become one, I'd have been about fifth-generation teacher.
*Still don't.
**Which I'd applied for in lieu of any other plan, partly in order to stay as a student and not have to think about it for another year
3. We have two mutual Facebook friends, neither of whom knows the other. How do you know them?
Helen and I met on a two-week-long residential arts summer school in Derbyshire, just after I took my O Levels. We got on well, and became pen pals for a while afterwards. We also shared the same surname, which we thought was highly risible. We lost touch after a few years, but then 'met' up again on the Girlsown mailing list. Then lost touch again, and 'met' again on LJ. We've now worked out that we're obviously destined to keep virtually bumping into each other, though actually we've never met in the flesh since that first two weeks.
Russ I know through the Hitch-Hiker's Guide To The Galaxy fan club, ZZ9 Plural Z Alpha. He was as a result another pen pal for a while (I tended to have about twenty pen pals at any one time back then. LiveJournal and FaceBook hadn't been invented). Haven't seen him for a good few years, which is a great shame.
4. What three things could you not live without?
Leaving aside physical necessities like food, sleep, air and so on, there's nothing I absolutely couldn't survive without. It's amazing what you can get used to if you have to, however awful. On the other hand that's a really boring answer to a good question, so I shall interpret it as three things that enrich my life and I would really really hate to have to do without.
BBC Radio. Specifically Radio 4, though if I absolutely couldn't have that then The World Service will do instead. (I can happily manage without all the music channels though)
Tea. OK, given the choice I'd give this up before I'd give up Radio 4, as there's plenty of alternatives, but I'd really prefer not to.
Written personal communication. As mentioned above, pre-internet I used to write letters to lots of people, even ones who I saw regularly (for a few weeks I and a classmate wrote to each other every day, hand-delivering the letters). Now I rarely write physical letters, but I still have one 'pen pal' by email, plus communicating with people on FB, LJ and the like.
5. What three things do you really wish no-one had ever invented?
The fashion industry. I just don't get fashion, and never have. Can't do it, can't get interested in it. I'm all for people looking nice and wearing beautiful things, but the fashion industry appears to be nothing to do with looking nice and all about trying to cram yourself into things that only look good on tall skinny adolescent boys. It's quite possible to have clothes that are unfashionable but beautiful, or unbeautiful but fashionable. Since my awareness of my own clothing or style rarely gets past "I'm not naked", I really can't do fashion, and I don't see why I should bother. However fashionable low-cut jeans are, I still want to have trousers that cover my underwear thankyouverymuch. And that have pockets, and just bloody fit. If you look good in a mini-skirt you should feel happy about wearing one, not be worrying whether actually A-line or ankle length is "in" this season and you'll look "so last year". If you like ruffles and look good in ruffles then wear ruffles; if ruffles make you look like a cheap box of chocolates then leave well alone, however fashionable they currently are.
The apostrophe. This may sound odd, since I happily I use apostrophes when appropriate (largely correctly, unless my typing's gone wrong or I'm having a very bad day) and am careful about their placement, but it DRIVES ME NUTS when they're used wrongly. I'd rather see one missed out when it should be there than put in unnecessarily. It appears that to most people apostrophes have ceased to mean contractions or possessives and now mean "holy shit here comes an S!" If they'd never existed I wouldn't be annoyed by idiots putting them in all over the place where they're simply wrong.
Celery. OK, it's not really an invention, so I shall amend that to the concept of putting celery in food. Or the idea of celery being food. Or any recipe that contains celery. Celery is evil. It lurks behind nice ingredients, ready to jump out and surprise you. There's nothing like chomping into a tasty sandwich, with salad bits and dressings and all good stuff, and suddenly encountering that crunch followed by the ghastly taste that infects all surrounding flavours with undeniable celeryness. My mum, who otherwise was a perfectly sane and reasonable woman, used to put celery in stews. When I complained about it she told me to pick the bits of celery out, which is like complaining about someone pissing in the swimming pool and being told to only swim in the non-pissy bits.
I may be overreacting here, and I'm sure celery has many nutritional benefits. I'm even - grudgingly - willing to admit that there might be some misguided folk who like the taste. But I'm happy to despotically deny them their celery fix if it would ensure that I never have to be ambushed by a bit of celery ever again.
6. You can have any vehicle you like, real or fictional. What do you choose and why?
Oh, that's an easy one. The Tardis! Do I need to explain?
Though I'd like it to come with The Doctor as a chauffeur and general tour guide please.
7. There is a major gig in Central Park. Dinosaurs appear and eat the headline act. Who has become dino-lunch?
I'm assuming this means which act would I like to see eaten by dinosaurs.
To please Number One Niece I shall say Justin Bieber, then she won't have to run out of the room to be sick whenever she hears him. If we're lucky they'll then go on the rampage and trample Coldplay as well.