(no subject)
just a few things...since i'm so easily distracted from writing my essay.
it's my final paper for my english class, and it's using coetzee's disgrace...however, i'm focusing on the chapter titled "desire" from my lit criticism & theory textbook (an excellent, excellent text!), and the fascination stems not only through application to coetzee's novel, but through many of the other works we've read this term, and through life in general. i wish i could pluck this essay straight from my head, because i have so many ideas floating around up there and i know i have a pretty profound understanding of the topic at hand, but i'm having a difficult time being articulate.
i've been listening to a cd of eric whitacre's choral works (the composer of water night, the piece i put in here a month or so ago), and this coupled with reading my textbook makes me feel so content. i am content, and i think the feeling isn't just the music and reading, but some other things in life right now. but i can stop typing for a second, close my eyes, breathe in....i am at peace. the ethereal harmonies and melodies from whitacre wrap me in a quixotic embrace; i am filled with the warmth of an elevated psyche, a comforting rhythm of my mind opening and receiving, an amazing flutter of senses and delicious discernment of the careful sentences and analyses in bennett & royle's chapter on desire, as a chord corresponds to the words to become minor, sustain, resolve, slowly decrescendo into nothing and then disappear like a sprightly wisp of enchantment that you can still feel, still long to reach out and grasp it is still so closely embedded in your soul.. like a ghost gently grazing the surface of your understanding.
twieuytosydtry lots of words, i know. i just needed to get some of it out there. i'm close to tears at being overcome with the untangible, and i have missed the freedom to feel this. i had denied myself it for awhile. i don't know why. but i am so ecstatic that something has allowed me to open these doors again.
it's my final paper for my english class, and it's using coetzee's disgrace...however, i'm focusing on the chapter titled "desire" from my lit criticism & theory textbook (an excellent, excellent text!), and the fascination stems not only through application to coetzee's novel, but through many of the other works we've read this term, and through life in general. i wish i could pluck this essay straight from my head, because i have so many ideas floating around up there and i know i have a pretty profound understanding of the topic at hand, but i'm having a difficult time being articulate.
i've been listening to a cd of eric whitacre's choral works (the composer of water night, the piece i put in here a month or so ago), and this coupled with reading my textbook makes me feel so content. i am content, and i think the feeling isn't just the music and reading, but some other things in life right now. but i can stop typing for a second, close my eyes, breathe in....i am at peace. the ethereal harmonies and melodies from whitacre wrap me in a quixotic embrace; i am filled with the warmth of an elevated psyche, a comforting rhythm of my mind opening and receiving, an amazing flutter of senses and delicious discernment of the careful sentences and analyses in bennett & royle's chapter on desire, as a chord corresponds to the words to become minor, sustain, resolve, slowly decrescendo into nothing and then disappear like a sprightly wisp of enchantment that you can still feel, still long to reach out and grasp it is still so closely embedded in your soul.. like a ghost gently grazing the surface of your understanding.
twieuytosydtry lots of words, i know. i just needed to get some of it out there. i'm close to tears at being overcome with the untangible, and i have missed the freedom to feel this. i had denied myself it for awhile. i don't know why. but i am so ecstatic that something has allowed me to open these doors again.