An Excerpt
I have a little over 22,000 words, and might reach the half way point before the weekend.
Here's a few short excerpts. Remember, this is raw and unedited.
“So, how did it go?” Mom asked as soon as she opened the door.
Yep, here we go, Zane thought. “Okay, I guess.”
“You guess?” She looked from him to the tall figure of Death. “What happened?”
“I had him sever the tie and he missed the first time.”
“Well that’s nothing.” She stepped aside to let them in. “Don’t worry about it, Zane.”
“I know. I’m trying.” He stepped past her and walked into the house.
She laughed lightly and held her hand out. “Here, let me hang up your cloak.”
As he was taking off the oversized gray cloak (his mom kept asking if he wanted her to tailor it, but he kept insisting that it was fine), his sister bounded down the stairs. “Hey, Zane! Did you have a good day?”
He shrugged. “Not too bad, I guess.”
She looked at his face and frowned. “Oh. Did something go wrong?”
Zane sighed and started to explain before his parents could. “I tried to sever the tie and missed the first time.”
“But you _did_ do it?”
“Yes.”
“Then what are you upset about? Dad let you use your scythe on the first day. That is sooo awesome!”
It was hard to stay sulky around his younger sister. A genuine smile touched his lips. “Yeah, it was pretty cool.” He hadn’t expected Dad to let him do anything on his first day, let alone something so important.
“I’ll have dinner out in about five minutes. Go wash up,” Mom said.
Ana followed him into the bathroom. “So what was it like?”
“A little privacy, please? I need to use the toilet.” He shooed his sister out and closed the door.
“Did any of the people want to know who you were?” Ana asked through the door.
“Shut up! It’s hard to pee with you talking to me.” He heard his sister’s exaggerated sigh and waited a few seconds to make sure she wasn’t going to keep talking. She started up again when he turned on the sink.
“Did Dad take you to any accidents? Did you see anything gross?”
“Don’t be morbid,” he said over the water. He finished washing his hands and opened the door.
“What? We’re Reapers. We sort of _have_ to be morbid.”
Zane rolled his eyes. “Have a little respect for the dead.”
(and a small scene with Tenai, the other main character)
The young man, not much more than a boy, walked down the main street of the village. Behind him, everything was in flames. Ahead of him, people fled, some of them screaming. At each house and building he came to, the young man raised his arms and shot flames out, standing in front of it until the structure was engulfed. Then he moved on to the next one. He gave almost no thought to the possibility of people still being inside the buildings. The smart ones had already fled. When he came across a man he recognized as one who had been at his house that night, he burned him as well.
Tenai hadn't come across any in the last several minutes. The men had run much faster than the women and children.
A stumbling, crying woman clutched her child's hand as she ran across Tenai's path. She tripped, over something in the street or over her own two feet. As she struggled to rise, she turned to shield her child from Tenai's approach. “Please ...” she begged when Tenai was only a few feet away. For a moment, the rage in his eyes faltered. He made a wide circle around the pair, leaving them clutching each other in the dusty road.
The rage rose back up in him, like fire caught on a fresh log. This village would burn. By tomorrow it would be nothing but charred timbers and ash. And the men that had fled wouldn't get far. Tenai would follow them, to the ends of the earth if he needed to. Every last one of them would die.
Here's a few short excerpts. Remember, this is raw and unedited.
“So, how did it go?” Mom asked as soon as she opened the door.
Yep, here we go, Zane thought. “Okay, I guess.”
“You guess?” She looked from him to the tall figure of Death. “What happened?”
“I had him sever the tie and he missed the first time.”
“Well that’s nothing.” She stepped aside to let them in. “Don’t worry about it, Zane.”
“I know. I’m trying.” He stepped past her and walked into the house.
She laughed lightly and held her hand out. “Here, let me hang up your cloak.”
As he was taking off the oversized gray cloak (his mom kept asking if he wanted her to tailor it, but he kept insisting that it was fine), his sister bounded down the stairs. “Hey, Zane! Did you have a good day?”
He shrugged. “Not too bad, I guess.”
She looked at his face and frowned. “Oh. Did something go wrong?”
Zane sighed and started to explain before his parents could. “I tried to sever the tie and missed the first time.”
“But you _did_ do it?”
“Yes.”
“Then what are you upset about? Dad let you use your scythe on the first day. That is sooo awesome!”
It was hard to stay sulky around his younger sister. A genuine smile touched his lips. “Yeah, it was pretty cool.” He hadn’t expected Dad to let him do anything on his first day, let alone something so important.
“I’ll have dinner out in about five minutes. Go wash up,” Mom said.
Ana followed him into the bathroom. “So what was it like?”
“A little privacy, please? I need to use the toilet.” He shooed his sister out and closed the door.
“Did any of the people want to know who you were?” Ana asked through the door.
“Shut up! It’s hard to pee with you talking to me.” He heard his sister’s exaggerated sigh and waited a few seconds to make sure she wasn’t going to keep talking. She started up again when he turned on the sink.
“Did Dad take you to any accidents? Did you see anything gross?”
“Don’t be morbid,” he said over the water. He finished washing his hands and opened the door.
“What? We’re Reapers. We sort of _have_ to be morbid.”
Zane rolled his eyes. “Have a little respect for the dead.”
(and a small scene with Tenai, the other main character)
The young man, not much more than a boy, walked down the main street of the village. Behind him, everything was in flames. Ahead of him, people fled, some of them screaming. At each house and building he came to, the young man raised his arms and shot flames out, standing in front of it until the structure was engulfed. Then he moved on to the next one. He gave almost no thought to the possibility of people still being inside the buildings. The smart ones had already fled. When he came across a man he recognized as one who had been at his house that night, he burned him as well.
Tenai hadn't come across any in the last several minutes. The men had run much faster than the women and children.
A stumbling, crying woman clutched her child's hand as she ran across Tenai's path. She tripped, over something in the street or over her own two feet. As she struggled to rise, she turned to shield her child from Tenai's approach. “Please ...” she begged when Tenai was only a few feet away. For a moment, the rage in his eyes faltered. He made a wide circle around the pair, leaving them clutching each other in the dusty road.
The rage rose back up in him, like fire caught on a fresh log. This village would burn. By tomorrow it would be nothing but charred timbers and ash. And the men that had fled wouldn't get far. Tenai would follow them, to the ends of the earth if he needed to. Every last one of them would die.