Not bad, not bad
Well, yeah. I had a couple moments today that were pretty bad - near panic attack conditions. Hyperventilating, shakes, nausea, all that fun stuff. Endorphin withdrawal is fun.
But more good realizations came out of today. I need to remember that it's her life, and I'm really not a part of it anymore. Things that I think I MUST know - well, I really don't in most of the cases. All insisting on an answer will do is cause stress that is unneeded. She says she's safe and doing okay, I need to leave it be.
I've also decided that for the time being, I'm going to let her pursue a possible friendship with me on her own terms. I'm feeling too much like I'm trying to force the friendship on her, and that has a predictable outcome.
Good conversations with people tonight also helped. Thank yous to Erik and Kim, Will and Laurel, Seth and xinfinitejestx, and Nyrie. Knowing my friends are here for me means so much. And especially the ones that aren't afraid to call me on my shit. You (quasi-Aquariuses) know who you are. ;)
I think that I'll be okay going forward. I may have a couple rough spots, but barring any unforseen kicks to the stomach, I think the worst is over. Moving on with my life is a good thing.
But more good realizations came out of today. I need to remember that it's her life, and I'm really not a part of it anymore. Things that I think I MUST know - well, I really don't in most of the cases. All insisting on an answer will do is cause stress that is unneeded. She says she's safe and doing okay, I need to leave it be.
I've also decided that for the time being, I'm going to let her pursue a possible friendship with me on her own terms. I'm feeling too much like I'm trying to force the friendship on her, and that has a predictable outcome.
Good conversations with people tonight also helped. Thank yous to Erik and Kim, Will and Laurel, Seth and xinfinitejestx, and Nyrie. Knowing my friends are here for me means so much. And especially the ones that aren't afraid to call me on my shit. You (quasi-Aquariuses) know who you are. ;)
I think that I'll be okay going forward. I may have a couple rough spots, but barring any unforseen kicks to the stomach, I think the worst is over. Moving on with my life is a good thing.