my horrible day..
my day was shot when i got called down to mr clarks office.i have never liked this man and i wish someoen else were my counsuler.besides that,i went to his office,the call slip said immedeately,so my teacher let me go.i left my book bag and things behind,not thinking that every 5 seconds the phone would ring in "doctor" clarks office.the man talks forever and then expected me to sit there through every phone call he got.i was there the entire period(3),sitting and waiting on what he wanted from me.then it hit me when he finally decided to hang up the phone,he told me that "we" had a problem when it was really my problem.he took out some papers and then i finally relized what it was.my fcat results were in.i have never wrote about this in my journal,i never really felt the need to talk about it.i know it is a seriuos matter,especally now me being a senior.in florida we have a standerized test called the fcat,the rule is,if you dont pass it,you dont graduate.pretty stupid huh? welli kow i felt stupid as i sat in that office and he gave me my results.good thing is,i passed the reading section,bad part i failed the math section.at that time when he told me that,everything i had prepared for myself,was torn into little bits of my memeory.i had so much planned and now i have to wait.i then walked out of his office,and began crying as i walked back to my classroom.i collected my things,and as i walked,and thought i cryed even more.i got to where i usally meet ebveryone for lunch,and tears just bursted for my eyes.i couldnt control it.i even started shaking,i rann right to teri,as i hugged her i said.."all i want is to graduate."she didnt say much,and i dont blame her.she then had to go to class,so she went.i cryed more as she left.i wanted to just collapse on the ground and sit there and think.but then jill and sara came up to me,jill hugged me but i just stood there,i couldnt move,i froze.i then collected myself and went inside the cafeteria,thought that maybe i should eat something and ate a salad.sitting with jill,sara and blair,i began crying just looking aorund,but then the mood lightend up,and they all kinda made me laugh.i needed that.then fourth period i just sat there thinking about it.i do that,i think to much. i went to 5th period and my friend heather asked what was worng,i told her and started crying again,cuase i thought about it.she talked to me about it,and then mrs walker asked what was wrong.i had to tell her,so i did.she said that she was very sorry and that i would get it,and hugged me.i was shocked,because at that monet she acted like she cared.i had to collect myslf again and i wne toutside,my friend cat was wlaking up,and she also asked what was worng.i told her and i sat down in between some stages and sat in the smallest thing i could.i told her that i wanted to see my mother smile when i walked up there and got my dipolma,i did this for her,but also myself.and now that wont happen.i blamed myself for this,because its just the way i am.but soon i relized that i can do it.in june i will take it again and have more courage and belief in myself then i did before.i will retake this stupid test and i will pass it.i will finish school and graduate.