(no subject)

[darkserena]

I cannot do anything right.

I just feel so completely lost and alone.

I miss what we had, but it's not fair to either of us that I want more.

Oh god I miss you. Your crazy hair, those random songs you sing me, that smirk I don't trust. I miss holding you. I miss leg snuggles at night. I miss being scolded when I'm being stubborn. I miss you.

I love you. A million times, I love you.

Maybe I AM giving up too quickly.

But maybe, on the other hand, you are trying too hard.

A day, a month, a year from now, maybe we'll see that what we had was exactly what we wanted all along. Maybe we'll have grown up by then, and we can make this work, both of us.

But right now, I need something more. I don't know what exactly, but I feel it. Maybe it's just some time to think. To miss you.

God knows I have that now.

I can't take anything back. But it doesn't change that I love you.

I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you I love you.

I just do. No matter what.

I hope that counts for something, in the end.

I've hurt someone I love more than anyone else in the world. And I feel horrible.

As well I should.

So completely, utterly, truly lost and alone.