heartbreak after heartbreak
hey.. well today was depression ttm.. lets see.. andy was bein a dick head.. he ignored me all day.. he said i look like a boy.. and he was all over some other chic after skewl.. so fuck that.. i didnt talk to him at all las night cuz i was depressed and i jus went to bed when me and my mom got home from Christiansburg...we ate dinner up there at this kick ass place we've been eatin at for ever, anyways.. thats besides the point of heartbreak... so yeah.. i dont know what the hell imma do..
andy.. ok.. he was so sweet to start out with .. stood up for me.. kissed me. hugged me.. told me i was beautifull .. took me out.. and now hes some complete jackass.. who makes fun of me.. ? where do u get that.. i knew i shoulda listened to kristin stafford.. she was talkin to him at the beginnin of the year.. same thing.. sweet then a total asshole..! god im so stupid..
Lane.. well he was never mean to me unless i broke up with him! who isnt mean when they get dumped? i am.. that boy loved me and cared so much about me?! and i gave him up for what? a dick head.. ! im so fuckin stupid.. now he wont even talk to me or call me.. i havent seen him for almost a month.. he took my virginity and he meant alot to me.. and now the one i gave it up to wont even talk to me.. isnt this glorious.! now ppl are gnnah think imma whore.. which i dont blame them..
ive tried so hard to get over her.. and i cant. she was my everything.. the only one who showed me what real love was.. it wasnt about looks... or even sexual things.. it was jus about bein happy and bein together.. i miss her so much... god! why did u have to take her away from me? i want her back so bad.. and no one will ever equal up to her.. i would do anything to gain my trust back with her and have her to hold in my arms.. i promised myself to never get my heartbroken again.. but i jus keep strivin to find someone to love me the way she did.. and no one ever will.. ive come to that conclusion.. LOVE SUCKS SO FUCKIN MUCH WHEN THE ONE YOU LOVE DOESNT WANT TO LOVE YOU BECUS YOURE A FUCK UP! god.. i hate knowin that im the reason for her pain and hurt.. im the reason why she feels so much hate for life.. why god? why?
omg! today couldnt get any worse.. i found out that jessies mom had to cut all of her hair out becuz it began to fall out over the weekend from her chemo.. i feel so bad for jess and the rest of her family.. they have been my second hand.. and they have always been here for me no matter what.. i dont wish cancer on no one.. not even the people i hate! i know what its like to go thru cancer witha family member and it aint easy.. its the hardest thing anyone can ever do or go thru.. i give jessies mom so much credit for bein as strong as she has.. shes a very strong woman and with the love she has for god and her will to get thru it.. i know she will.. i want jess to know that ill always be her best friend no matter the stress im goin thru.. or what we do.. i love her so much.. thru everything shes been by my side and right now i know this is her biggest struggle.......and i want to be right beside her thru it all.. ill always b here for her no matter what...
Jessie i love you gerl.. and if u need anything.. u know my number and u call me..!
rachel..thanks for bein here.. ur my niggy! LoL..good luck with niggy 3! and ur decision!
andy.. thanks for bein such a prick!
kenneth.. thanks for bein here for me..
cwissi.. glad we are friends again
michael Doyle.. love yew man.. too bad u love amber..
o.0 brandy
andy.. ok.. he was so sweet to start out with .. stood up for me.. kissed me. hugged me.. told me i was beautifull .. took me out.. and now hes some complete jackass.. who makes fun of me.. ? where do u get that.. i knew i shoulda listened to kristin stafford.. she was talkin to him at the beginnin of the year.. same thing.. sweet then a total asshole..! god im so stupid..
Lane.. well he was never mean to me unless i broke up with him! who isnt mean when they get dumped? i am.. that boy loved me and cared so much about me?! and i gave him up for what? a dick head.. ! im so fuckin stupid.. now he wont even talk to me or call me.. i havent seen him for almost a month.. he took my virginity and he meant alot to me.. and now the one i gave it up to wont even talk to me.. isnt this glorious.! now ppl are gnnah think imma whore.. which i dont blame them..
ive tried so hard to get over her.. and i cant. she was my everything.. the only one who showed me what real love was.. it wasnt about looks... or even sexual things.. it was jus about bein happy and bein together.. i miss her so much... god! why did u have to take her away from me? i want her back so bad.. and no one will ever equal up to her.. i would do anything to gain my trust back with her and have her to hold in my arms.. i promised myself to never get my heartbroken again.. but i jus keep strivin to find someone to love me the way she did.. and no one ever will.. ive come to that conclusion.. LOVE SUCKS SO FUCKIN MUCH WHEN THE ONE YOU LOVE DOESNT WANT TO LOVE YOU BECUS YOURE A FUCK UP! god.. i hate knowin that im the reason for her pain and hurt.. im the reason why she feels so much hate for life.. why god? why?
omg! today couldnt get any worse.. i found out that jessies mom had to cut all of her hair out becuz it began to fall out over the weekend from her chemo.. i feel so bad for jess and the rest of her family.. they have been my second hand.. and they have always been here for me no matter what.. i dont wish cancer on no one.. not even the people i hate! i know what its like to go thru cancer witha family member and it aint easy.. its the hardest thing anyone can ever do or go thru.. i give jessies mom so much credit for bein as strong as she has.. shes a very strong woman and with the love she has for god and her will to get thru it.. i know she will.. i want jess to know that ill always be her best friend no matter the stress im goin thru.. or what we do.. i love her so much.. thru everything shes been by my side and right now i know this is her biggest struggle.......and i want to be right beside her thru it all.. ill always b here for her no matter what...
Jessie i love you gerl.. and if u need anything.. u know my number and u call me..!
rachel..thanks for bein here.. ur my niggy! LoL..good luck with niggy 3! and ur decision!
andy.. thanks for bein such a prick!
kenneth.. thanks for bein here for me..
cwissi.. glad we are friends again
michael Doyle.. love yew man.. too bad u love amber..
o.0 brandy