(no subject)

[darkscythe616]

To believe I was once considered one of the elite teenagers in the world. Just kidding. I would not exactly say we were the elite group of teenagers, but definitely some of the most insightful, intelligent, diverse and [insert another ideal quality here] group of teenagers in the world. I read about all of the things they are doing and all the stuff they're involved in and a part of me gets jealous. A part of me feels like I'm not living up to the full potential that I could be. Then that voice which reminds me why I am who I am now and into the things I'm into now because I wanted to get away from who I use to be kicks in. My intent was not to get away from the former social pariah(or at least the positive apsects that came along with it for me), but the person who was basically molded by the expectations of family members, teachers and other school officials. I was always the responsible one from elementary school up to high school. Guess that's why I have let go so much in college to the point of doing things that got me into trouble or could get me into trouble. Still have not mustered up the courage to let go to the point where I can freely talk to any girl I am attracted to WITHOUT being intoxicated might I add. There is still time to work on that. I guess you can say I have been leading a double life at home and at school. The inner dork in me never goes away though and definitely rears his head when the opportunity arises. While this may be the case, I'm content with the fact that I'm a bit of a dork, a dysfunctional drunk, a former intellect and outcast with a medley of other words that can not be narrowed down to one particular subculture or noun.

On a side note, believe it or not, I did not throwdown on my 21st bday like most people probably thought I would have done. I just hung out with my friends and my little brothers(blood and fraternity).