That's a little harder for me to articulate because it varies so much. Let's just say that, while a lot of women do exhibit that obnoxious "I'm entitled to your smile" thing, it's honestly something I've noticed about almost every negative interaction I've had with men. That's a trend I notice among men.
This was true even when I was a kid. I was sent to a school psychologist once who insisted that there was no reason for me to be quiet because I was "smart and pretty". I wanted to say, "If you thought I was stupid and ugly, though, it would be okay? My being quiet would make sense then?"
It's harder for me to make generalizations about the way women react to my demeanor because it really varies. Some of them do encroach on my comfort zone, but not because they want to hit on me. I've had a lot of women ask me "why" I was so quiet, or else they'd speculate aloud in front of me, or behind my back.
"Is it because you're the youngest sister?" "Is it because of your parents' divorce?" "Is it because of your mother's difficulty with the English language?" "Is it because your parents hit you?" "Is it because you're a minority?"
You know what, maybe it has to do with all of those things. I'm not entirely sure. That's none of anybody's business, though there are tactful ways to ask those questions. Basically, I think, people want to be assured that it isn't them, it's me. That's fine and I'm willing to validate that concern. What pisses me off, though, is when people insist that, because I'm quiet, I'm unhappy. I HATE that. "Why are you so morose all the time?" "I'm not morose all the time." I HATE arguing with people that I feel one way when they think I don't. Then the argument makes me unhappy and I end up confirming their hunch. In that case, it ain't me, it's them.
What pisses me off, though, is when people insist that, because I'm quiet, I'm unhappy. I HATE that. "Why are you so morose all the time?" "I'm not morose all the time." I HATE arguing with people that I feel one way when they think I don't. Then the argument makes me unhappy and I end up confirming their hunch.
This was true even when I was a kid. I was sent to a school psychologist once who insisted that there was no reason for me to be quiet because I was "smart and pretty". I wanted to say, "If you thought I was stupid and ugly, though, it would be okay? My being quiet would make sense then?"
It's harder for me to make generalizations about the way women react to my demeanor because it really varies. Some of them do encroach on my comfort zone, but not because they want to hit on me. I've had a lot of women ask me "why" I was so quiet, or else they'd speculate aloud in front of me, or behind my back.
"Is it because you're the youngest sister?"
"Is it because of your parents' divorce?"
"Is it because of your mother's difficulty with the English language?"
"Is it because your parents hit you?"
"Is it because you're a minority?"
You know what, maybe it has to do with all of those things. I'm not entirely sure. That's none of anybody's business, though there are tactful ways to ask those questions. Basically, I think, people want to be assured that it isn't them, it's me. That's fine and I'm willing to validate that concern. What pisses me off, though, is when people insist that, because I'm quiet, I'm unhappy. I HATE that. "Why are you so morose all the time?" "I'm not morose all the time." I HATE arguing with people that I feel one way when they think I don't. Then the argument makes me unhappy and I end up confirming their hunch. In that case, it ain't me, it's them.
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Story of my life.
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