(no subject)
My first love was a tall boy with
glasses that made my heart melt when he laughed. Love when youre that
young doesnt mean what it does now. (I dont actually even know what
love means now, I dont think its something that needs verbalizing like
that, you can just know and that's ok.) He held my hand and made me
laugh, and when trouble hit was the sympathetic soul I needed.
Incredible listener. We were so idealistic, it was so fresh, I dont
really remember ever feeling so sick and angry as I sometimes do now.
That's either young love or old memories.
Now love involves fighting and working, and its great, because it also involves passion and strength. I like the way things have worked out, Im not a complacent person and could never survive in a merely convenient relationship, or one of those that's been going for so long its habit. They shouldnt be about habit, settling, or any of that garbage. Im a bit judgemental about that; if youre in one of those, Ive probably glared at you about it at some point, and Im sorry. Im just trying to stick my stubborn ideals of a naive, passionate love into the context of a working, lasting relationship.
I dont know where this is coming from, I just know things could suck right now and Im trying to over think bigger things so I dont have to see them in my own life, because Im scared of what it all might mean. I dont think you know at all what this is doing to me. I need to get out.
Now love involves fighting and working, and its great, because it also involves passion and strength. I like the way things have worked out, Im not a complacent person and could never survive in a merely convenient relationship, or one of those that's been going for so long its habit. They shouldnt be about habit, settling, or any of that garbage. Im a bit judgemental about that; if youre in one of those, Ive probably glared at you about it at some point, and Im sorry. Im just trying to stick my stubborn ideals of a naive, passionate love into the context of a working, lasting relationship.
I dont know where this is coming from, I just know things could suck right now and Im trying to over think bigger things so I dont have to see them in my own life, because Im scared of what it all might mean. I dont think you know at all what this is doing to me. I need to get out.