(no subject)
why am I the way I am.......
well my mother died last year very sadly which am still trying to come to terms with as I now fell very much alone even though I had friends I fell like none really understood and with no living family staying in Scotland apart form my daughter and how do you talk to a kid about what is going on in your head
and whilst crawling in to a bottle I found someone that was all ready there we had been friends for a very very long time and somewhere between the drinking and the hugs wee kisses and that let to sleeping together every moment we could get oh did I forget to say she was marred yeah I know I should know better but like most of my life things are never 100% right and then one day when am waiting for her to come over I get a call saying she's going to stay with her dad in England and she's left him and that she will be back in a wee bit
that was over a year a go still with no answer or good buy
and once more I crawled back in to the bottle as it felt and feels that everyone that I let get close to me just up and leaves but am battling back its been a long road but am getting there and while I am getting there it feels like am waking up from the drunken sleep since iv been in and I feel a need to change who and what I am
that is all for today
well my mother died last year very sadly which am still trying to come to terms with as I now fell very much alone even though I had friends I fell like none really understood and with no living family staying in Scotland apart form my daughter and how do you talk to a kid about what is going on in your head
and whilst crawling in to a bottle I found someone that was all ready there we had been friends for a very very long time and somewhere between the drinking and the hugs wee kisses and that let to sleeping together every moment we could get oh did I forget to say she was marred yeah I know I should know better but like most of my life things are never 100% right and then one day when am waiting for her to come over I get a call saying she's going to stay with her dad in England and she's left him and that she will be back in a wee bit
that was over a year a go still with no answer or good buy
and once more I crawled back in to the bottle as it felt and feels that everyone that I let get close to me just up and leaves but am battling back its been a long road but am getting there and while I am getting there it feels like am waking up from the drunken sleep since iv been in and I feel a need to change who and what I am
that is all for today