regaining my heart
so yeah, when i said i would keep some entries public if there was something i needed to say? well, this is one of those things...
i just finished reading an amazing book, Wild at Heart by John Eldredge and i might just be at some watershed in my life...
for the past forever i thought i wanted to be a doctor. it seemed god had blessed me with abilities that could be used in that field, and that i had a longing to help people and use technology. well, now i'm not quite so sure. i don't know exactly what it is i'm doing right now, but i want to take some time over this break to spend with god by myself. i need to find out what it is my heart is truly looking for. i need to find an adventure to live (and maybe someone to live it with)... basically what i'm asking for is support from my friends and whoever else reads this thing (since apparently people are reading this without my knowledge) (: ... be that by prayer or just helping me know that i have people to fall back on in the tough times ahead of me.
in wild at heart, the author notes that 3 things are constantly assaulting a man's heart - the self, satan, and the world. during this time, i know i will come over heavy assault to not do what i want to do and do what i do not want to do. i will need the help of my family and friends in the upcoming part of my life to battle those three things. for a while now i have been feeling restless and that there is another reason for living other than to just "get through it" as it seems that i have been doing as of late. i want to get my heart back before i lose anymore of it.
i still have three exams to struggle through, and yes, the result of these will most likely determine if i will be a doctor or not (because i am not taking biology or chemistry ever again!), and i do want to do well on them, so i will be studying these next few days for all i'm worth, but after these are over, and i have time to myself, i plan to go somewhere by myself for a few days and just be with god and figure out what it is my heart is longing for. i want something to live for, and i want to become close to god in the real way, to know him as a person and a friend, not just a theology...
thanks, i love y'all for being my friends...
-Keith
i just finished reading an amazing book, Wild at Heart by John Eldredge and i might just be at some watershed in my life...
for the past forever i thought i wanted to be a doctor. it seemed god had blessed me with abilities that could be used in that field, and that i had a longing to help people and use technology. well, now i'm not quite so sure. i don't know exactly what it is i'm doing right now, but i want to take some time over this break to spend with god by myself. i need to find out what it is my heart is truly looking for. i need to find an adventure to live (and maybe someone to live it with)... basically what i'm asking for is support from my friends and whoever else reads this thing (since apparently people are reading this without my knowledge) (: ... be that by prayer or just helping me know that i have people to fall back on in the tough times ahead of me.
in wild at heart, the author notes that 3 things are constantly assaulting a man's heart - the self, satan, and the world. during this time, i know i will come over heavy assault to not do what i want to do and do what i do not want to do. i will need the help of my family and friends in the upcoming part of my life to battle those three things. for a while now i have been feeling restless and that there is another reason for living other than to just "get through it" as it seems that i have been doing as of late. i want to get my heart back before i lose anymore of it.
i still have three exams to struggle through, and yes, the result of these will most likely determine if i will be a doctor or not (because i am not taking biology or chemistry ever again!), and i do want to do well on them, so i will be studying these next few days for all i'm worth, but after these are over, and i have time to myself, i plan to go somewhere by myself for a few days and just be with god and figure out what it is my heart is longing for. i want something to live for, and i want to become close to god in the real way, to know him as a person and a friend, not just a theology...
thanks, i love y'all for being my friends...
-Keith