spn - Some People Have Real Problems
Title: Some People Have Real Problems
Author: Liv
Characters: Bela Talbot, Dean Winchester
Rating: R
Summery: Bela was never the victim, but she wasn’t the bad guy either.
Disclaimer: I don’t own the character you see before you, however any and all original characters are mine, please ask before you use them.
Warnings: spoilers for season three.
The door nearly splintered as it slammed open, a couple tangled in each others arms stumbling inside the room. Dean was gripping Bela’s hair tightly at the scalp, his other hand shoved down her underwear, while Bela dug her nails into the back of his neck with one hand and cupped him through his jeans with the other. Her shirt was in pieces around her shoulder, and his had been lost somewhere in the Impala. Neither of them had shoes on. Dean pulled his hand out of her hair, tugging out a few strands wound around his fingers and moving to work on her pants, shoving them down her legs and gripping her thighs and sliding her up the wall.
“I fucking hate you,” growled Dean against her mouth, kissing her brutally until her lips bled. Bela responded in kind, moving her hand from in between his legs and sliding it into his hair, pulling his head back so she could look down at him.. She sneered at him.
“Ditto.”
Dean jerked his head out of her hand and lowered his mouth to her neck, biting the pressure point underneath her jaw. She hissed at him, wrapping her legs around his waist.
“Fuck, Dean.”
In the morning she woke up curled in his arms, her lips pressed against his neck, his arms wrapped around her and his cheek pressed against her forehead. He had nail marks down his back that were caked in blood, and she had bruises on her hips and arms and shoulders and probably a black eye from where he punched her. It was so intimate and comforting and safe that Bela hadn’t wanted to leave. She’d never stayed the night with a lover, and there she was in Dean’s arms, pressed against him, feeling safe, safer than she ever had in her life.
She left so she didn’t have to look at the disgust in his eyes when he woke up. She gathered her clothes with her back to him, if she had turned around she would have seen him watching her, wondering when they had started making love instead of fucking. He pretended he didn’t feel proud of himself when he watched her wince as she walked.
They both pretended it never happened.
.
The stupid pink line made her sick to her stomach. She wanted to cry. She was pregnant with Dean’s baby. It was enough to make her puke her lunch up right there. A baby, with Dean Winchester.
Bela felt her breath catch in her throat and she leaned back against the wall, sliding down until she was sitting down, her knees drawn up to her chest. It’d been years since she cried, but she welcomed the feeling and let her tears out. She cried for herself mostly, herself and the stupid things she did. Making a deal with the devil, getting angry enough to sleep with Dean in the back of his car, then again in his motel room, then twice again in the actual bed because who knew he had that kind of stamina? The first time he couldn’t look at her, had her face pressed into the seat cushion when he fucked her from behind, telling her how disgusted he was of himself. She pretended it hadn’t made her feel worthless, just a little, but she told him he could go to hell, and she knew how much that stung.
She was going to hell in five months, Dean was going in seven. Neither of them were going to take care of a baby, because neither of them were going to be alive to do it.
The bitter laughter that had been building inside her since she’d woken up in Dean’s arms the night after they’d slept together finally made it’s way to the surface and she laughed like a crazy person with tears running down her face, clutching the stupid plastic stick with the stupid pink line that told her she was going to be a mom.
“No,” ground out Bela bitterly. Deep down she was telling herself it might be okay to keep it, but the reality of it was she would be an awful mother, with the enemies she had, the things she‘d done. She‘d never be able to love anything, not a man and not a child. It hurt to admit it, but it was the truth, and that always did hurt.
.
Bela slid her hand across her stomach, feeling whoever was in there move. She swallowed the lump in her throat, cursing her fucking emotions with every fiber of her being. It was starting to piss her off that Dean continued to be the cause of her tears. She coughed back the tears in her eyes and settled her other hand against her swollen belly, wincing at the new feeling as another wave of emotions caught her by surprise.
She should have gotten rid of it.
.
She woke up to find her dark hair plastered against the side of her neck, her hands shaking slightly, stomach convulsing in waves. Bela groaned, catching her breath as she sat up in bed, her hand automatically finding it’s way to her belly. She choked back a curse as the contraction went as quickly as it came. Her body shivered from the strain and she inwardly cursed Lilith an her stupid, fucking dogs. That was the only reason labor was going to be difficult, she thought to herself. Lilith in her amusement, letting her dogs play with her for what seemed like hours, leaving her in the Winchester’s motel room, bleeding, screaming, and pregnant. Still pregnant. Lilith had gone ridged when she walked in with her dogs, almost as if she were listening to someone.
She practically spit acid when she told Bela that the colt would be fine, she could go on living her beautiful lie of a life. White eyes flickered to her abdomen and a ruthless smile touched the little girls lips.
“I’ll leave you with a souvenir.”
.
The little girl sleeping contently in her arms almost made her reconsider. Almost. She swallowed back whatever feelings she might have grown for Dean’s child over the past months and set her mind on what needed to be done. She had been calling the thing growing inside her Dean‘s child for months and she was, she was Dean‘s child. Not hers. Dean would be able to take care of her better than she ever would, it was a grim thought, but Bela really didn’t have a better option. Dean would hate her for it, but honestly if he didn’t hate her already…
Bela swallowed again and shifted the baby against her chest, ignoring the aching feeling in the pit of her stomach. Tears filled her eyes and in a moment of weakness, buried her face against her baby’s check, pressing a wet kiss to her forehead as hot tears slid down her cheeks.
Neutral colored eyes blinked up at her, an unsteady hand reaching up to touch her mother’s face, tugging on a lock of hair brushing against her face. Bela caught her breath, pulling away finally and slowly moving down to her knees, placing her daughter in the basket, arranging her among the blankets. The unnerving eyes slowly closed in sleep and Bela finally found the courage to just walk away.
And if they were both lucky, she would never come back.
Dear, Dean.
I’m sorry you had to find out this way, that I’m not dead. You were right to never trust a demon, but Lilith must have taken the order not to kill me from someone else, because I’m alive. Still.
A few months ago we had that moment. It was just sex, and that’s all it should have been, but I was pregnant. I hated you for it, I still hate you for it. It’s a girl, and she’s yours. I don’t care what you do with her, but I don’t want to know. You’ll hate me forever because I didn’t tell you I was carrying your child and then leaving her for you to deal with, but I honestly don’t care. I had to spend nine months thinking about you, because every time she moved all I could think about was you. It drove me mad, because I hate you so much for doing this to me. You probably haven’t thought about me in months, and honestly I don’t blame you. If it was up to me I would have done the same.
I should have gotten rid of her and saved us both the trouble, but I couldn’t. I don’t know why, because I’ve never had a problem with doing what needed to be done before, but I couldn’t get rid of her. She’ll have your eyes, I’m sure of it. Hopefully there wont be anything of me in her, and she’ll just be your daughter, so you never have to think of me again.
I wont seek you out, and I hope you do me the same courtesy and never look for me either. I never thought I’d write this, let alone say it, but I’m sorry. For everything I put you through, and I think if we had met in some alternate universe I could actually love you. I think I almost do.
It’s a shame, Dean, but you have to know that you’ll be a better parent than I could ever be. I’ve always been so callous and cold because I could never get too close to anyone, I can’t keep her because of what my parents did to me. What my own father did to me, and my mother just sat back and let it happen. I would never be able to keep her, not with thinking of what happened to me as a girl. You wanted to know why I killed my parents and sold my soul? Now you know. You wont think of me any less or more because you’re that kind of person, you’ll always treat me the same and I hope you do. Take care of our daughter, won’t you? Don’t ever let anything happen to her. I know you wont.
Tell Sam I said hi.
Goodbye, Dean.
Bela
Author: Liv
Characters: Bela Talbot, Dean Winchester
Rating: R
Summery: Bela was never the victim, but she wasn’t the bad guy either.
Disclaimer: I don’t own the character you see before you, however any and all original characters are mine, please ask before you use them.
Warnings: spoilers for season three.
The door nearly splintered as it slammed open, a couple tangled in each others arms stumbling inside the room. Dean was gripping Bela’s hair tightly at the scalp, his other hand shoved down her underwear, while Bela dug her nails into the back of his neck with one hand and cupped him through his jeans with the other. Her shirt was in pieces around her shoulder, and his had been lost somewhere in the Impala. Neither of them had shoes on. Dean pulled his hand out of her hair, tugging out a few strands wound around his fingers and moving to work on her pants, shoving them down her legs and gripping her thighs and sliding her up the wall.
“I fucking hate you,” growled Dean against her mouth, kissing her brutally until her lips bled. Bela responded in kind, moving her hand from in between his legs and sliding it into his hair, pulling his head back so she could look down at him.. She sneered at him.
“Ditto.”
Dean jerked his head out of her hand and lowered his mouth to her neck, biting the pressure point underneath her jaw. She hissed at him, wrapping her legs around his waist.
“Fuck, Dean.”
In the morning she woke up curled in his arms, her lips pressed against his neck, his arms wrapped around her and his cheek pressed against her forehead. He had nail marks down his back that were caked in blood, and she had bruises on her hips and arms and shoulders and probably a black eye from where he punched her. It was so intimate and comforting and safe that Bela hadn’t wanted to leave. She’d never stayed the night with a lover, and there she was in Dean’s arms, pressed against him, feeling safe, safer than she ever had in her life.
She left so she didn’t have to look at the disgust in his eyes when he woke up. She gathered her clothes with her back to him, if she had turned around she would have seen him watching her, wondering when they had started making love instead of fucking. He pretended he didn’t feel proud of himself when he watched her wince as she walked.
They both pretended it never happened.
.
The stupid pink line made her sick to her stomach. She wanted to cry. She was pregnant with Dean’s baby. It was enough to make her puke her lunch up right there. A baby, with Dean Winchester.
Bela felt her breath catch in her throat and she leaned back against the wall, sliding down until she was sitting down, her knees drawn up to her chest. It’d been years since she cried, but she welcomed the feeling and let her tears out. She cried for herself mostly, herself and the stupid things she did. Making a deal with the devil, getting angry enough to sleep with Dean in the back of his car, then again in his motel room, then twice again in the actual bed because who knew he had that kind of stamina? The first time he couldn’t look at her, had her face pressed into the seat cushion when he fucked her from behind, telling her how disgusted he was of himself. She pretended it hadn’t made her feel worthless, just a little, but she told him he could go to hell, and she knew how much that stung.
She was going to hell in five months, Dean was going in seven. Neither of them were going to take care of a baby, because neither of them were going to be alive to do it.
The bitter laughter that had been building inside her since she’d woken up in Dean’s arms the night after they’d slept together finally made it’s way to the surface and she laughed like a crazy person with tears running down her face, clutching the stupid plastic stick with the stupid pink line that told her she was going to be a mom.
“No,” ground out Bela bitterly. Deep down she was telling herself it might be okay to keep it, but the reality of it was she would be an awful mother, with the enemies she had, the things she‘d done. She‘d never be able to love anything, not a man and not a child. It hurt to admit it, but it was the truth, and that always did hurt.
.
Bela slid her hand across her stomach, feeling whoever was in there move. She swallowed the lump in her throat, cursing her fucking emotions with every fiber of her being. It was starting to piss her off that Dean continued to be the cause of her tears. She coughed back the tears in her eyes and settled her other hand against her swollen belly, wincing at the new feeling as another wave of emotions caught her by surprise.
She should have gotten rid of it.
.
She woke up to find her dark hair plastered against the side of her neck, her hands shaking slightly, stomach convulsing in waves. Bela groaned, catching her breath as she sat up in bed, her hand automatically finding it’s way to her belly. She choked back a curse as the contraction went as quickly as it came. Her body shivered from the strain and she inwardly cursed Lilith an her stupid, fucking dogs. That was the only reason labor was going to be difficult, she thought to herself. Lilith in her amusement, letting her dogs play with her for what seemed like hours, leaving her in the Winchester’s motel room, bleeding, screaming, and pregnant. Still pregnant. Lilith had gone ridged when she walked in with her dogs, almost as if she were listening to someone.
She practically spit acid when she told Bela that the colt would be fine, she could go on living her beautiful lie of a life. White eyes flickered to her abdomen and a ruthless smile touched the little girls lips.
“I’ll leave you with a souvenir.”
.
The little girl sleeping contently in her arms almost made her reconsider. Almost. She swallowed back whatever feelings she might have grown for Dean’s child over the past months and set her mind on what needed to be done. She had been calling the thing growing inside her Dean‘s child for months and she was, she was Dean‘s child. Not hers. Dean would be able to take care of her better than she ever would, it was a grim thought, but Bela really didn’t have a better option. Dean would hate her for it, but honestly if he didn’t hate her already…
Bela swallowed again and shifted the baby against her chest, ignoring the aching feeling in the pit of her stomach. Tears filled her eyes and in a moment of weakness, buried her face against her baby’s check, pressing a wet kiss to her forehead as hot tears slid down her cheeks.
Neutral colored eyes blinked up at her, an unsteady hand reaching up to touch her mother’s face, tugging on a lock of hair brushing against her face. Bela caught her breath, pulling away finally and slowly moving down to her knees, placing her daughter in the basket, arranging her among the blankets. The unnerving eyes slowly closed in sleep and Bela finally found the courage to just walk away.
And if they were both lucky, she would never come back.
Dear, Dean.
I’m sorry you had to find out this way, that I’m not dead. You were right to never trust a demon, but Lilith must have taken the order not to kill me from someone else, because I’m alive. Still.
A few months ago we had that moment. It was just sex, and that’s all it should have been, but I was pregnant. I hated you for it, I still hate you for it. It’s a girl, and she’s yours. I don’t care what you do with her, but I don’t want to know. You’ll hate me forever because I didn’t tell you I was carrying your child and then leaving her for you to deal with, but I honestly don’t care. I had to spend nine months thinking about you, because every time she moved all I could think about was you. It drove me mad, because I hate you so much for doing this to me. You probably haven’t thought about me in months, and honestly I don’t blame you. If it was up to me I would have done the same.
I should have gotten rid of her and saved us both the trouble, but I couldn’t. I don’t know why, because I’ve never had a problem with doing what needed to be done before, but I couldn’t get rid of her. She’ll have your eyes, I’m sure of it. Hopefully there wont be anything of me in her, and she’ll just be your daughter, so you never have to think of me again.
I wont seek you out, and I hope you do me the same courtesy and never look for me either. I never thought I’d write this, let alone say it, but I’m sorry. For everything I put you through, and I think if we had met in some alternate universe I could actually love you. I think I almost do.
It’s a shame, Dean, but you have to know that you’ll be a better parent than I could ever be. I’ve always been so callous and cold because I could never get too close to anyone, I can’t keep her because of what my parents did to me. What my own father did to me, and my mother just sat back and let it happen. I would never be able to keep her, not with thinking of what happened to me as a girl. You wanted to know why I killed my parents and sold my soul? Now you know. You wont think of me any less or more because you’re that kind of person, you’ll always treat me the same and I hope you do. Take care of our daughter, won’t you? Don’t ever let anything happen to her. I know you wont.
Tell Sam I said hi.
Goodbye, Dean.
Bela