Baseball Fever (78/?): Charlie and Don go to the doctor
Title: Baseball Fever (78/?)
Summary of the story (only updated through chap 42)
Full Chapter List (up to date)
Fandom: NUMB3RS
Pairing/characters: Don Eppes/Colby Granger, Don Eppes/Charlie Eppes, Don Eppes/OMCs
Rating: NC-17
Summary: Charlie discovers some unexpected things about his sexy older brother.
Part 78 - Charlie and Don go to the doctor
Charlie's doctor is not happy.
Word Count: 2461
Notes/Warnings: (Spoilers) Incest, abusive relationship, suicidal thoughts
Previously in "Baseball Fever": Still reeling from being dumped by his abusive boyfriend Colby, Don gets himself injured by a former sex partner. Charlie rescues Don and nurses him back to health. After Don is recovered, they allow their mutual attraction to flare again, an attraction that Charlie has struggled with all his life but that Don only recently discovered at a hotel getaway. They agree that there is no future in a romantic relationship between them. Charlie decides that he needs to find Don a boyfriend, and chooses a family friend, Alexei. Don and Alexei begin dating, though Don is still in the closet. They date for almost six months.
Don gets a jolt when he receives a letter from his landlord which reminds him that he used to pay for his rent with sex. Though Alexei is supportive of Don getting help, all of Don's deep hatred for himself comes roaring back and he is certain he can never have a healthy, normal relationship. He breaks up with Alexei and goes home to drown his sorrows. There he discovers that Charlie has had stomach problems ever since Don got together with Alexei. Don makes a deal with Charlie for him to eat, but Charlie ends up vomiting. Don takes care of Charlie and ends things on a better note with Alexei. Don vows to move back home and take care of Charlie until he's well. Don learns what a challenge that's going to be because Charlie's not only been not eating, but also walking to excess. Charlie gives Don a late-night blowjob.
On Monday morning, Don takes Charlie to work and sets him up in a private breakroom. He has an agent keep an eye on Charlie and tries to focus on his job. Don takes Charlie home and after another blowjob from Charlie, they have an argument about who's fault Charlie's condition is. Don cuts off the argument when Charlie's stomach pains return.
Part 78: Charlie and Don go to the doctor
Charlie sat and looked at the floor as Don and Dr. Ray talked over his head. Dr. Ramakrishnan, aka Dr. Ray, had been Charlie’s doctor on and off since he moved up from a pediatrician. Dr. Ray had been shocked by Charlie’s condition when Don had brought Charlie in this morning and now he and Don were discussing what to do about it. They’d tried to involve Charlie in the conversation but gave up when he just mumbled or shrugged. He didn’t want to be here, he wanted to be home with Don. He was embarrassed and uncomfortable and just the trip to the doctor’s office was exhausting.
The morning had started off well. Any morning that Charlie woke up in the same bed as Don was a good morning. Don had gotten Charlie dressed and fed him yogurt and oatmeal for breakfast. Don had held Charlie’s hand and the stomach pains had stayed away.
Don had then called into his office, having a long conversation with David about some ongoing investigation. Charlie had been happy to just sit and watch Don walk around and listen to his half of an animated conversation. Charlie knew that eventually he’d need his brain to start working again, and at some point he’d be panicked to realize just how bad his mental state had been, but he didn’t care yet. Not when Don was nearby.
Don had told his office he’d be in soon then driven them to Dr. Ray’s office. Now they were discussing diets and tests. Dr. Ray wanted to put Charlie in the hospital but Don was trying to head that off. Dr. Ray asked if Charlie had seen the therapist that he’d referred him to. Charlie shook his head no and looked at the floor some more.
Don put his hand on Charlie’s shoulder. Then Don started to spin out a long, complicated story about this coworker that Charlie was obsessed with that Charlie couldn’t have a relationship with. Charlie remembered vaguely telling Don about the lie about a coworker he’d told Dr. Ray, in order to explain his psychosomatic symptoms. Charlie couldn’t exactly admit he that the person he was obsessed with his brother. Don continued the story but saying that the coworker was moving out of the department after this semester, and since Charlie was on medical leave, Charlie wasn’t seeing “her” as often. Don said he had been removing any triggers for her out of Charlie’s life and Charlie was doing much better on that front. Don was being his most charming and persuasive that Charlie didn’t need further psychological treatment or a hospital, that Don’s care would be enough. Dr. Ray was skeptical, but he would give Don one week to show improvement in Charlie or else he would insist on hospitalization. As it was, he was going to require bloodwork and he saw problems, he’d put Charlie in the hospital anyway. Charlie managed a relieved smile at Dr. Ray and promised to follow the doctor’s - and Don’s -- instructions completely.
They left with half a dozen pages of printouts. Don and Charlie got in his car then Don drove around the corner and parked under a tree.
“Whew,” Don said, smiling crookedly at Charlie. “That was close.”
“Yeah,” Charlie said. “I do not want to go to a hospital.”
Don turned to face him. “You’ll do everything he said to do?”
“Yes.”
“Eat and tell me if you throw up?”
“Yes.”
“If you take off on a walk once, I will tell Dr. Ray to put you in that hospital.”
“I won’t.”
Don reached over and stroked Charlie’s cheek. “Dammit, Charlie,” he said huskily. “This scared me. I thought I knew how bad it was but I didn’t really know. Why on earth you would do that for me-” Don stopped himself and ruffled Charlie’s hair. “Let’s get you a snack then get that bloodwork done.”
Two hours after that they left a local laboratory where they’d gone to get Charlie’s blood drawn. It had been a struggle. After an hour, Charlie had managed to give up enough blood to satisfy the lab tech. The tech had told Charlie he was dehydrated and insisted on him drinking several juice cans before he was allowed to leave.
Looking grim, Don stopped at a grocery store. He left Charlie in the car and came back with more juice and items from the doctor’s food list. Charlie looked at all the food and groaned. He would have a hard time eating all this even if he ate all day. The expression on Don’s face made him swallow his complaints - and some pomegranate juice. Don didn’t have to remind him that they only had one week for him to show improvement or it was into the hospital. That’s if the bloodwork turned out okay.
Finally, they got to the FBI office. Charlie collapsed, exhausted, onto the couch in his break room, not even bothering to complain about being put back in jail. His jailor, Agent Tammy MacDonald, was still getting instructions from Don when Charlie drifted off.
Don paused at the doorway to the break room. Charlie didn’t look like he’d moved, even though it had been four and a half hours since Don had left him here. Tammy had checked in on Charlie, but said she’d never seen him awake. Don hadn’t wanted to be gone so long, but since he’d basically taken the morning off, he’d had a lot of work to make up. Don quietly shut the door behind him. Charlie looked so skinny. Don wanted to take food and put it straight into his body - which is what they would be doing in a hospital, he realized. Maybe he was being selfish, wanting to take care of Charlie himself instead of letting professionals do it. He just felt like it was his fault that Charlie had gotten into this state, so he had to do anything to get him out of it.
Grimacing, he looked at his watch. He had a conference call with the Las Vegas field office in 10 minutes so he couldn’t linger. He went and crouched down next to Charlie.
Touching his cheek, he said, “Hey, buddy.”
Charlie blinked and licked his lips. Those lips looked dry, but the lab tech had warned him that severe dehydration couldn’t be solved all at once. Don went to the little fridge and got out some mango juice and a turkey sandwich.
“I don’t have long,” Don said as he helped Charlie to sit up. “That gas station money laundering case is heating up.”
“Did they catch the guy?” Charlie asked.
“No and it’s starting to look bigger than we thought. We even-” Don paused. “I’ll talk while you drink that juice and eat that sandwich.”
Charlie grumbled but he began to chew and swallow the sandwich. Don continued his narrative, putting in as many math-related details that he could think of. It was hard to tell if Charlie was following what he was saying, or if Don could have been speaking French for all he understood. Don kept a smile on his face and talked until the clock told him he needed to leave. He kissed Charlie’s forehead and said he’d be back as soon as he could. He felt Charlie’s eyes on him as he left.
Two hours and 13 minutes later - Don had been counting - Don paused with his hand on the knob to the break room. Tammy, who was sitting in the office across the hall, smiled and nodded to him. When he paused further, she came out.
“He’s awake,” Tammy said. “This morning I made sure his tablet was filled with new content. He seemed to like the baseball the most, so I put more of that.”
Don chuckled wryly. “He does like baseball.”
“I checked on him at 5:17. Since your last visit, he’s had 12 ounces of orange juice and 10 ounces of miso soup. I warmed the soup for him.”
“Thanks,” Don nodded. He’d given Tammy the doctor’s printouts and asked her to make sure that Charlie kept pushing fluids. It was beyond the scope of her job to be asking her this, but Charlie was considered a member of the team here. Besides, she got a cushy private office for two weeks and time off the usual grunt work that the most junior agents had to do. Still, it galled Don that anyone had to take care of Charlie but him.
“He, uh…”
“Yes?”
She smiled sheepishly. “He had the strong request that we get softer toilet paper for the bathroom in there.”
“Ok,” Don said. “I’ll get some tonight. Did he ask for anything else?”
She shook her head and Don hid his disappointment. The Charlie he knew, a healthy Charlie, wouldn’t have been satisfied to stay in a room all day with just baseball videos and miso soup.
“A day at a time,” Don said, more for himself than her.
“Of course.”
Don opened the breakroom door and went in. Charlie was sitting up, watching a video. He looked up and smiled when he saw it was Don.
“How are you feeling?” Don asked.
“Like a camel.”
“You checking the color of your urine?”
“Yes, Nurse Eppes.”
“Almost clear yet?”
“…no.”
“Okay, more fluids.”
“Ugh…”
Don sat down on the couch near Charlie. He wanted to put his arm around Charlie but wasn’t sure he’d be able to keep it brotherly. “Dr. Ray called, the bloodwork came back. He says you’re only staying out of the hospital by the skin of your teeth. And he’s going to have you do it again in one week and if the tests don’t look better…”
“Into hospital,” Charlie said gloomily.
Don patted his knee. “What are you watching?”
“Recent game. Twins and Tigers, Oct 2009. The AL Central tiebreaker.”
“I remember that one.”
“Pretty good.” But he set the tablet aside. “How is the gas station case?”
“Eat something while I talk?”
Charlie sighed but didn’t protest when Don opened the fridge and got out a protein smoothie. He swallowed it down with a grimace. Don filled Charlie in on developments, but he had the feeling that Charlie wasn’t really interested, he just wanted Don nearby.
After a few minutes, Don said, “I’ve got maybe 45 minutes of work left to do today then I want to go downstairs and workout. That okay, buddy?”
Charlie dropped his eyes and nodded. Don resisted the urge to say anything further. On the off chance that Charlie wasn’t thinking about Alexei, Don didn’t want to bring him up. But Don needed to keep up with his hard-won physical fitness and he didn’t dare leave Charlie alone at home to go to a gym. Fortunately, the office building had a gym and Don always kept workout clothes here, just in case.
“After I’m done, I’ll come get you and we can go home. Think about what you want for supper, okay?”
Charlie nodded again but didn’t look up. At least he wasn’t grabbing his belly, like he did when the stomach pains got bad.
“See you soon,” Don said with forced cheerfulness and left.
Charlie was watching a baseball game but he was thinking about Don. Well, he was always thinking about Don, but this time he was remembering a moment from their mountain resort. It wasn’t one of the pleasant moments that Charlie usually replayed endlessly. It was the morning after the first time, the morning after Charlie had coaxed Don into letting Charlie suck his cock in the middle of the night then Don had demonstrated the hand-n-hump. Don had been horrified the next morning, panicked, and hid in the shower. Then he’d grabbed his running clothes and left, presumably to the resort exercise room. When he’d returned to the room, over an hour later, he had looked horrible. He was soaked with sweat, grey-faced and trembling. He’d obviously run himself into the ground to try to get away from the memory of what had happened between them.
Charlie pictured Don downstairs in the gym. Was he running away from Charlie still? Charlie knew that Don would never admit that he was, but Charlie and his problems would make anyone would want to run away. Charlie also knew how damaging to Don was Charlie’s inability to let Don have a good relationship without him. Charlie had tried so hard to let Don go, stepped aside for Alexei. His body had refused to do it. Now that Charlie knew that Don was the love of his life, Charlie literally couldn’t swallow losing him.
Charlie put down the tablet and picked up his coconut water. He knew Tammy would be in to check on him soon. He took a drink, set it down, picked it up again and took another drink.
Charlie felt like he was in a race.
Would his health improve enough fast enough or would he be put in the hospital?
But that wasn’t the race he was the most worried about.
Would Don be able to hold out until Charlie could have sex with him or would Don go back to Alexei first?
Don was working out downstairs. How long until Don missed his exercise partner, his sex partner? Charlie could be neither right now.
Dammit, why couldn’t he have let Don stay with Alexei…
Charlie sipped his coconut water and remembered another moment from the resort, right after Don had come back from running himself sick.
At that time, Don had pushed past Charlie and gone to stare out the picture window at the winter mountains. Charlie had stepped around Don and gotten a good look at his face.
What was on Don’s face had sent a cold stab of fear into Charlie’s chest. Charlie had seen this look before, though not from Don. It was the look of a suspect who had stopped caring about anything, who saw no escape, no hope, no future. It was the look of a suspect who was about to raise his gun, force the FBI’s hand. It was the look of a suspect who was about to deliberately walk into a bullet.
Charlie shuddered now, remembering it.
Was Charlie forcing Don to choose him, forcing him into a relationship that had no future?
Charlie set down the coconut water and laid down on the couch. The anger and self-hate that pulsed through him was like nothing he could ever remember. Was this how Don felt? How did he survive it? And why could Charlie not stop making it worse?
Charlie closed his eyes. The race he was running suddenly seemed pointless. The most he could help Don was to not be here at all.