Beggar of the Ivory Tower
t's pretty amazing how sometimes a lot of changes and developments in life can occur in a pretty short time, even though superficially, you could say I've really just spent a lot of time sitting home and playing Valkyria Chronicles. It's like water flowing under a frozen river? That seems like an appropriate simile somehow, possibly due to how frickin' cold it's been in Finland, these last couple of days.
Any rivers notwithstanding, I guess it's that Heraclitan thing - the difference is actually in my outlook and perspective, so, the one doing the changing is me.
In a more concrete sense, my life seems to have taken a curious turn lately in that I suddenly seem to be spending a lot effort telling various institutions that they should give me money to do research. Last week, in point of fact, I finished my second ever real, honest-to-God grant application. it was a actually lot less exciting than the first time, although there's definitely a degree of satisfaction in getting professors to write signed papers about how clever and diligent you are.
Unlike the first grant, which I got in December, this one isn't for my thesis, but for travel expenses for an archaeological project my advisor is planning that may or may not materialize next summer, depending on whether the Turkish government sees fit to grant me a research visa. I guess I'll find in a month or two. I think one of the things that makes me feel my age in university is that it doesn't seem to surprise me anymore how it's clearly impossible to plan a project in a way that wasn't rushed or confused.
Anyway, I do hope that one works out, since I actually do have only a very faint idea as to what else there might be in store for me next summer - even more so than usual, since against all odds, getting employed in archaeology is clearly getting even more difficult here. Among other things, the powers that be cut the budget for the National Board of Antiquities by something like 15% just now, and it's hard not to conclude that this means that we're screwed, basically.
(For some reason though, Helsinki still thinks that they can totally afford to build a Guggenheim Museum here. Yeah, that makes sense!)
Anyway. It may be a good thing now that I'm specializing in Near Eastern archaeology. I've appreciated that it's a privileged position, of sorts, for a while now - if only because the the field in Finland is so small that the teachers actually cares about what I'm doing - since that way, my immediate future may be less dependent on the whims of national financial policy and more on the whims and successes of my advisor.
Speaking of my advisor, it seems I'm settling into the role of the minion. Lackey? Henchman? Monkey boy? Unpaid help? I think I like "minion" best. That this situation is, all in all, desirable - and everyone agrees that it is - is really telling about what a strange and ultimately archaic society academia is. All these years of studying and taking exams and writing essays and ultimately it boils down to finding somebody to become a flunkey to, who will hopefully make some use out of your talents - in my case, a part of that seems to be drawing pretty pictures for my advisor's upcoming article.
A number of my close friends at university appear to have just reached the same stage, having found a master mad scientist evil genius dark overlord - you know what, let's go with master - to render their loyalty and servitude to, in an academic sense. Funny thing is, everybody seems much happier for it. There's a bizarre undercurrent of confidence, reassurance and *gasp* optimism from these people that I swear I haven't seen in years. It's a step up from wading through the darkness all on your own.
For my part, the whole notion that my thesis project is actually being funded - officially! - is actually pretty interesting feeling, one that I've had some time to digest now. I mean... it's money, and not even a huge amount of it in the end, but the psychological impact was actually a lot bigger than I expected. When it comes down to it, it's tangible proof that someone thinks what I'm doing is important enough that I ought to be given money for it. I feel... validated!
Of course, it's auspicious in a more general sense, too. For instance, now that I've gotten one, it's easier for me to apply for more grants and scholarships, since foundations and grant programs apparently operate under the somewhat lazy logic that if one of their esteemed ranks has seen fit to confer a grant upon me, obviously I must be worth supplying with more funding. It's kind of like having gotten a level at the Grad Student prestige class that comes with a "(Maybe) Get Funding!" class ability. I have passed a barrier that, as of now, is explicitely proven not to be impassable. That's actually... kinda cool!
And of course, it is money, which, in my case, is actually a really nice thing to have, since I really will be using said cash for research - specifically, a research trip to Turkey. I've seen enough angst from my peers who have had to fund some substantial part of their thesis from their own pockets that I can't even imagine how much more motivating it is to do something like this when you have funding for it.
And so. Next stop, the British Institute at Ankara, where, starting Wednesday, I'm going to spend two weeks hopefully reading lots and lots of books and writing my thesis. So yay for that, because the next deadline is finishing my thesis. Around April or so.
That will also be when I graduate. Heavens forbid.
Any rivers notwithstanding, I guess it's that Heraclitan thing - the difference is actually in my outlook and perspective, so, the one doing the changing is me.
In a more concrete sense, my life seems to have taken a curious turn lately in that I suddenly seem to be spending a lot effort telling various institutions that they should give me money to do research. Last week, in point of fact, I finished my second ever real, honest-to-God grant application. it was a actually lot less exciting than the first time, although there's definitely a degree of satisfaction in getting professors to write signed papers about how clever and diligent you are.
Unlike the first grant, which I got in December, this one isn't for my thesis, but for travel expenses for an archaeological project my advisor is planning that may or may not materialize next summer, depending on whether the Turkish government sees fit to grant me a research visa. I guess I'll find in a month or two. I think one of the things that makes me feel my age in university is that it doesn't seem to surprise me anymore how it's clearly impossible to plan a project in a way that wasn't rushed or confused.
Anyway, I do hope that one works out, since I actually do have only a very faint idea as to what else there might be in store for me next summer - even more so than usual, since against all odds, getting employed in archaeology is clearly getting even more difficult here. Among other things, the powers that be cut the budget for the National Board of Antiquities by something like 15% just now, and it's hard not to conclude that this means that we're screwed, basically.
(For some reason though, Helsinki still thinks that they can totally afford to build a Guggenheim Museum here. Yeah, that makes sense!)
Anyway. It may be a good thing now that I'm specializing in Near Eastern archaeology. I've appreciated that it's a privileged position, of sorts, for a while now - if only because the the field in Finland is so small that the teachers actually cares about what I'm doing - since that way, my immediate future may be less dependent on the whims of national financial policy and more on the whims and successes of my advisor.
Speaking of my advisor, it seems I'm settling into the role of the minion. Lackey? Henchman? Monkey boy? Unpaid help? I think I like "minion" best. That this situation is, all in all, desirable - and everyone agrees that it is - is really telling about what a strange and ultimately archaic society academia is. All these years of studying and taking exams and writing essays and ultimately it boils down to finding somebody to become a flunkey to, who will hopefully make some use out of your talents - in my case, a part of that seems to be drawing pretty pictures for my advisor's upcoming article.
A number of my close friends at university appear to have just reached the same stage, having found a master mad scientist evil genius dark overlord - you know what, let's go with master - to render their loyalty and servitude to, in an academic sense. Funny thing is, everybody seems much happier for it. There's a bizarre undercurrent of confidence, reassurance and *gasp* optimism from these people that I swear I haven't seen in years. It's a step up from wading through the darkness all on your own.
For my part, the whole notion that my thesis project is actually being funded - officially! - is actually pretty interesting feeling, one that I've had some time to digest now. I mean... it's money, and not even a huge amount of it in the end, but the psychological impact was actually a lot bigger than I expected. When it comes down to it, it's tangible proof that someone thinks what I'm doing is important enough that I ought to be given money for it. I feel... validated!
Of course, it's auspicious in a more general sense, too. For instance, now that I've gotten one, it's easier for me to apply for more grants and scholarships, since foundations and grant programs apparently operate under the somewhat lazy logic that if one of their esteemed ranks has seen fit to confer a grant upon me, obviously I must be worth supplying with more funding. It's kind of like having gotten a level at the Grad Student prestige class that comes with a "(Maybe) Get Funding!" class ability. I have passed a barrier that, as of now, is explicitely proven not to be impassable. That's actually... kinda cool!
And of course, it is money, which, in my case, is actually a really nice thing to have, since I really will be using said cash for research - specifically, a research trip to Turkey. I've seen enough angst from my peers who have had to fund some substantial part of their thesis from their own pockets that I can't even imagine how much more motivating it is to do something like this when you have funding for it.
And so. Next stop, the British Institute at Ankara, where, starting Wednesday, I'm going to spend two weeks hopefully reading lots and lots of books and writing my thesis. So yay for that, because the next deadline is finishing my thesis. Around April or so.
That will also be when I graduate. Heavens forbid.