Just because he can't hear what you say, doesn't mean that he's not listening...
We walked away from each other so long ago. I, because I couldn't bare to see your disappointnment in me during a time where I wasn't tall at the shoulder. You, I surmise because you outgrew needing me in your life.
I don't think you'll read this, or know this exists, or ever will. And even if you did, I fear you won't be in any position to read it for a long time.
Footsteps alogn fencetops, too many bandages, too many things bandages couldn't fix. We both battled in a vain atempt to keep the other in the realm of the okay, but I've found, especially recently... especially when reminded of you, that the realm of the okay is where pixies, unicorns and leprechauns live.
The thoughts of what you'd say to me when you see me make me want to claw at my skin. I know that you'd be concerned for me first, you picked up my ability to completely abandon my problems for that of another... you get that from my side of the family.
I barely recognized you. The girl I had protected from cougars and Americans and other savage wildlife, wasn't anywhere under the bruising, life support accessories, dried blood and other signs of being maimed. When I touched your hand you were cold. When I said your name... I'll admit I was expecting you to sit up like I had said a magic word. When I left... you couldn't ask me to stay. I couldn't have stayed if I was three times braver than who I actually am.
I may never get to see you again. My attempts this weekend were unsucessful, and anyone can tell you that I discourage easily.
I love you little sister.
I don't think you'll read this, or know this exists, or ever will. And even if you did, I fear you won't be in any position to read it for a long time.
Footsteps alogn fencetops, too many bandages, too many things bandages couldn't fix. We both battled in a vain atempt to keep the other in the realm of the okay, but I've found, especially recently... especially when reminded of you, that the realm of the okay is where pixies, unicorns and leprechauns live.
The thoughts of what you'd say to me when you see me make me want to claw at my skin. I know that you'd be concerned for me first, you picked up my ability to completely abandon my problems for that of another... you get that from my side of the family.
I barely recognized you. The girl I had protected from cougars and Americans and other savage wildlife, wasn't anywhere under the bruising, life support accessories, dried blood and other signs of being maimed. When I touched your hand you were cold. When I said your name... I'll admit I was expecting you to sit up like I had said a magic word. When I left... you couldn't ask me to stay. I couldn't have stayed if I was three times braver than who I actually am.
I may never get to see you again. My attempts this weekend were unsucessful, and anyone can tell you that I discourage easily.
I love you little sister.