[Fic] Time Passes But We're Still Strangers
The first few days he doesn't see the hand at all. This is all right, he expected as much.
--
The first few days, Theta wanders the TARDIS, loses himself in her and goes as deep as he can. Doing this, he can almost pretend he's home again.
--
The Doctor finds him in the console room, sitting on the floor and humming softly to himself. It's nothing he's familiar with and he asks him about it.
He says it's a song that the TARDIS sang him, he said it's a song that reminds him of home.
--
When he hears the song softly in his mind that night, Theta feels like he's going to be ill and even though he doesn't want to, he can't help but beg the Doctor's TARDIS to stop.
--
The Doctor makes him tea but the hand doesn't touch it. He says he doesn't remember if he likes tea or not but he's hiding his face as he does so.
Lying is simply something else the Doctor is better at.
--
He leaves after a while. The Doctor gets tired of sitting there watching him while Theta watches nothing at all. He says he'll be back later to check on him and just for a second, for a brief moment, Theta can't help but wish it was the Doctor with the memory problems.
He feels guilty afterwards, more guilty than he ever thought he could and goes to find the other, muttering softly about being so sorry.
The Doctor smiles.
--
He lives inside a fractured mind, inside of a place that's disheveled and unkempt. Thoughts are scattered, half-formed and flaring up at the most inconvenient of times. The Doctor tries to fix them, tries to fill in the pieces that are missing and mend the tears and jagged edges.
It doesn't work though, not in the slightest.
He doesn't stop trying, of course, but in the back of his mind, he comforts himself with the fact that the Master didn't manage to do anything for him either.
--
Everything goes askew when the Doctor is done in his mind. Everything's sliding, slipping out of his fingertips and he wonders if the Doctor just broke him more or if Koschei isn't there to make him better.
Either way, he stops coming out of the room he was given..
--
The Doctor finds him immobile and isn't quite sure what to do. He had gotten a somewhat incoherent babble on all of this at one point or another, ranting and raving about the black that comes, but he never quite understood. Now he stands at the foot of the bed and understands completely.
--
He doesn't remember ever getting pulled out of the blackness before but it feels like nothing else he's ever experienced.
Waking up, he sees the Doctor but the lights burn his eyes, even though he's not completely sure he has eye sat all. Sounds make him cringe and when the Doctor reaches out to touch him, try and offer something that was a comfort, Theta cries.
Nothing ever hurt this much, nothing ever felt so wrong and he doesn't know what o do o who he can ask to just make this stop.
When the words slip out from his lips and the Doctor pushes him back down, back into the darkness again, he's still crying but i's out of relief.
--
Well, he won't be trying that again, at least not in that particular fashion anyway.
--
The first few days, Theta wanders the TARDIS, loses himself in her and goes as deep as he can. Doing this, he can almost pretend he's home again.
--
The Doctor finds him in the console room, sitting on the floor and humming softly to himself. It's nothing he's familiar with and he asks him about it.
He says it's a song that the TARDIS sang him, he said it's a song that reminds him of home.
--
When he hears the song softly in his mind that night, Theta feels like he's going to be ill and even though he doesn't want to, he can't help but beg the Doctor's TARDIS to stop.
--
The Doctor makes him tea but the hand doesn't touch it. He says he doesn't remember if he likes tea or not but he's hiding his face as he does so.
Lying is simply something else the Doctor is better at.
--
He leaves after a while. The Doctor gets tired of sitting there watching him while Theta watches nothing at all. He says he'll be back later to check on him and just for a second, for a brief moment, Theta can't help but wish it was the Doctor with the memory problems.
He feels guilty afterwards, more guilty than he ever thought he could and goes to find the other, muttering softly about being so sorry.
The Doctor smiles.
--
He lives inside a fractured mind, inside of a place that's disheveled and unkempt. Thoughts are scattered, half-formed and flaring up at the most inconvenient of times. The Doctor tries to fix them, tries to fill in the pieces that are missing and mend the tears and jagged edges.
It doesn't work though, not in the slightest.
He doesn't stop trying, of course, but in the back of his mind, he comforts himself with the fact that the Master didn't manage to do anything for him either.
--
Everything goes askew when the Doctor is done in his mind. Everything's sliding, slipping out of his fingertips and he wonders if the Doctor just broke him more or if Koschei isn't there to make him better.
Either way, he stops coming out of the room he was given..
--
The Doctor finds him immobile and isn't quite sure what to do. He had gotten a somewhat incoherent babble on all of this at one point or another, ranting and raving about the black that comes, but he never quite understood. Now he stands at the foot of the bed and understands completely.
--
He doesn't remember ever getting pulled out of the blackness before but it feels like nothing else he's ever experienced.
Waking up, he sees the Doctor but the lights burn his eyes, even though he's not completely sure he has eye sat all. Sounds make him cringe and when the Doctor reaches out to touch him, try and offer something that was a comfort, Theta cries.
Nothing ever hurt this much, nothing ever felt so wrong and he doesn't know what o do o who he can ask to just make this stop.
When the words slip out from his lips and the Doctor pushes him back down, back into the darkness again, he's still crying but i's out of relief.
--
Well, he won't be trying that again, at least not in that particular fashion anyway.