(no subject)
I hope to god this works out.. it just has to. I wish I hadn't been such a whiney jerk. I guess all I can do now is wait and hope for another chance to prove I can be good. I'll do anything for her and to make this work out. She wants me to leave her alone so I've gotta try my hardest to not talk to her until she wants to talk to me again. I'm trying to stay optimistic and I keep telling myself it'll work out, my friend told me he's sure it'll work out too. It's just too perfect to not work. Everyone seems to be against us but I don't care I know we can be great I love her too much to accept that it can end. I shaved the mustache part of my goatee.. she complained about hair going up her nose when we kissed, so it's gone now. I know I'll get to kiss her again, it just HAS to work out I believe too strongly in us for it to end. I can't talk to her for awhile so i'll be talking to you for a few days at least journal. I actually asked god to grant me this one favor.. go figure.. I gave up on him long ago but damn I'm that desperate. Maybe if I shave my entire face? Or perhaps if I work on my typing skills, grammar and spelling.. I don't know but I'm gonna do all I can. Tch! Man! If I hadn't been so damn overwhelming and clingy and so caught up in all the things that I wanted we probly wouldn't have ever argued at all! It makes me kind of angry with myself for it but I suppose there's nothing I can do about that now. But if she lets me have another chance :) it'll be different. I just have to stay optimistic and believe in myself and in her. Things keep rolling over in my head and I want to talk to her so badly and just will everything better again. We both said before we wanted to stay together forever, so I'm gonna hold on to that thought.. and the blanket she let me take to my parents house.. until she lets me come back. I know I can make things right, I just know it.. I can't sleep at all, but the power keeps going out here so I can't even stay online any longer, I guess I'll go watch T.V. until we head out to go get my computer in the morning.. I hope I can have a hug at least..