I DONT KNOW
ok so i move to bfe, fall in luv with sleep, decide to start making up for lost time with my dad, and realize that my mom
never loved me anyway
what kind of person can excuse the decisions she has made
over the last 17 years of her life???
raped her??? he raped her??? bull shit.
killed my sisters dog?? killed her dog?? more bull shit.
when i went to stay with andrew last weekend to go to military ball, i didnt tell her i was gonna be in town
i figured it was better that she didnt know.
so, sunday rolls around, and i decide, hey? what the heck? lets go and get the rest of MY crap, lets go get MY JOURNALS MY CDS MY JEWELRY MY INSENCE ALL MY SHIT. THAT SHE feels like she can just go through like its no big fin deal. ok.
so i go to moms house, go in the living room, and she just starin at me like im crazy, after all she did try to have me committed so i guess the stare suited her approach to me. but anyhow, so im in the living room, and i just say, "hey, getting the rest of my stuff.." and i start packing. so dad waits outside with bobby while i bring stuff to the car in pillowcases that i already had, cuz she claims not to have any trash bags.. ofcourse. she comes in my old room and throws papers in my face and says, "HERE! SINCE YOU THINK IM JUST A LIAR!" AND WALKS OUT. SO i said, "OH, OK, SO THIS MUST BE FROM WHEN DAD SUPPOSEDLY RAPED YOU RIGHT??" SHE says nothing back.. only waddles to her recliner to watch more reality tv and to continue sulking in her loss of motherhood. i feel no guilt.
she has denied any understanding.
she says ive broken her heart.
she broke mine first.
she has never loved me.
she has lied to me for 17 years.
she has robbed me of my father.
she has forced me into fear of my brother, trey. and now.
now she wants remors4e?????
she will probably get online tonigt, read all of this, print it off and send it to a shrink who she will pay to tell her im fucked up and neeed pills.
and she will prbably call my dad tomorrow and tell him that i need therepy.
and i will probably hate her for the rest of eternity
and she will probably never know how much id rather not
but that's how it is, isn't it?
thats how she wants it, is it?
thats the beauty of life, right?
cheerio..
never loved me anyway
what kind of person can excuse the decisions she has made
over the last 17 years of her life???
raped her??? he raped her??? bull shit.
killed my sisters dog?? killed her dog?? more bull shit.
when i went to stay with andrew last weekend to go to military ball, i didnt tell her i was gonna be in town
i figured it was better that she didnt know.
so, sunday rolls around, and i decide, hey? what the heck? lets go and get the rest of MY crap, lets go get MY JOURNALS MY CDS MY JEWELRY MY INSENCE ALL MY SHIT. THAT SHE feels like she can just go through like its no big fin deal. ok.
so i go to moms house, go in the living room, and she just starin at me like im crazy, after all she did try to have me committed so i guess the stare suited her approach to me. but anyhow, so im in the living room, and i just say, "hey, getting the rest of my stuff.." and i start packing. so dad waits outside with bobby while i bring stuff to the car in pillowcases that i already had, cuz she claims not to have any trash bags.. ofcourse. she comes in my old room and throws papers in my face and says, "HERE! SINCE YOU THINK IM JUST A LIAR!" AND WALKS OUT. SO i said, "OH, OK, SO THIS MUST BE FROM WHEN DAD SUPPOSEDLY RAPED YOU RIGHT??" SHE says nothing back.. only waddles to her recliner to watch more reality tv and to continue sulking in her loss of motherhood. i feel no guilt.
she has denied any understanding.
she says ive broken her heart.
she broke mine first.
she has never loved me.
she has lied to me for 17 years.
she has robbed me of my father.
she has forced me into fear of my brother, trey. and now.
now she wants remors4e?????
she will probably get online tonigt, read all of this, print it off and send it to a shrink who she will pay to tell her im fucked up and neeed pills.
and she will prbably call my dad tomorrow and tell him that i need therepy.
and i will probably hate her for the rest of eternity
and she will probably never know how much id rather not
but that's how it is, isn't it?
thats how she wants it, is it?
thats the beauty of life, right?
cheerio..