train songs [05]

[tictoctictoc]

At length, the stairwell Addy, Brandon, and Russel are on bottoms out onto a dimly lit hall, more of a landing than a room, full of refuse and dust. There is a man there, sleeping, dressed in several layers of clothing and dirty through and through. A battered radio sits next to his feet. Brandon is forcibly reminded of the homeless man they

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[call_me_rat]

The song doesn't strike any chord, but Russel stands watching the homeless man. It's better to sleep in a well-lit place like this because nobody will mess with you except the cops, but then that also means sooner or later you get woken up by being prodded by a nightstick and some annoyed voice telling you to move along. And in winter, when the layers aren't enough, newspaper makes a good insulation...

He shakes his head. How does he know all this? Why does it feel like firsthand experience? He and Brandon have been through some pretty tight times, but never like that. It takes an effort to pull out of his thoughts and look to his brother. "Yeah... yeah, it might be good to get above ground again, see what the damage is."

[victormakesart]

"Yeah. Ah.` Above ground, or... I'm not claustrophobic, but this doesn't sit right with me." She's listing the things that could go wrong in an enclosed space like this. Her list starts with Asphyxiation by Carbon Monoxide and ends with Zapped by Tracks. There's a Cave In near the front of her list. She covers her mouth, coughs, squinting against the less-than-properly-bright light.

[tictoctictoc]

"It looks like a place They'd be, doesn't it?" Brandon agrees softly, moving out onto the platform. He looks around, then pauses in dismay. "There aren't any steps to the outside. We're going to have to take a train. Or walk in the tunnels."

He doesn't fancy the idea of walking along the tracks. Zapped by Tracks is a prevalent worry in his mind, too.

[call_me_rat]

"Just... take it and see where it goes?" They don't have tokens or anything, but since they're already inside the station and on the platform that shouldn't matter. Russel shrugs and nods, but he has to force himself to turn away from the homeless man. He's tempted to tuck some money into his coat or something, and it's not fear of reprisal from Brandon that stops him. He's not sure he trusts anything or anyone but them right now, and he half expects the homeless man to stand up and attack them with a syringe or something. He follows Brandon and Addy, and waits watching the dark tunnel for the next train.

[victormakesart]

"Yeah. It feels weird, not to have a destination, but... maybe it'll do that thing where we transition to another place without melting our surroundings." She follows Brandon, one hand quite carefully at his elbow, like she's scared that she'll lose him. Which she is. This is not her usual haunting ground, and she feels like she doesn't belong here. Which she doesn't. In a world of birds and moles, Addy is a bird, and she likes to see and know what everything around her is doing.

[tictoctictoc]

Brandon flashes Addy a weak smile. "That would be nice, wouldn't it? It doesn't sound like too much to ask."

He places his hand over hers gently to reassure her. He doesn't have any real fear of the subway or the underground, but something about the surroundings seems ominous all the same, and he'll be glad when they're back on street level. Or so he thinks.

A rumble and a flash of lights indicates a train approaching. Brandon glances back to make sure Russ is with them, nodding. "It almost doesn't matter where it goes. Any place is better than the place we just nearly got killed."

This is probably untrue if he thinks about it, but he doesn't want to think about it in detail right now.

[call_me_rat]

"Um..." Russel can think of about twenty places that are worse right off the top of his head, but he's not about to say so. There's no point in being alarmist. He comes closer to them both as the train pulls in, half protective, half afraid of getting left behind

[victormakesart]

Addy can think of a lot, too, and Brandon's words make her hand tighten on his elbow. Actually, it's the tendons and ligaments and muscles in her hand that make her hand tighten, but it's prompted by his words. She has the same problem with this place that she has with the elevator, and she's very frightened that the entire train will just ram into a wall.

All the same, it's this, or wander around aimlessly where there are people, and we all know that people are either zombies, bald men, or Brandon and Russel. Grimy or not, Addy has to sit. Addy feels like death on legs, which is quite a feat.

Most of her makeup has been worn off, and the scarring across her collarbone and neck and arms stand out in stark relief in the unflattering lighting. She stifles a yawn. "The thing is... I can't think of a single place that can't get turned into something scary. Not a single place."

[tictoctictoc]

Brandon looks a little better than Russel, who has been knocked around, but he certainly feels like hell. He sinks heavily into a seat after noticing how Russel's checking the place out for them. No bald men with knives waiting to slash hamstrings? Good. His head rests against the window with a soft thunk.

"I know," he says to Addy. "And what's worse, I'm not sure what we can do about it, except keep moving. If I'm really Cornelius Gibbs, and you're really Victor Allen, and Russ is really Markus 'Rat' Rathbone...how do we get back to who and where we were? Or do we want to?"

[call_me_rat]

Russel's older, too, by more then ten years. As brothers they think the gap is less, but right now he's feeling a lot older. He sinks down in the closest seat with a sigh, now that he's checked the place out and they're on the move. Now that there's time to sit and rest, he realizes he's aching from the fight with the Stranger. He slouches in the seat, across from Brandon and Addy, the brim of his cap shading his face.

"Without knowing who those other versions of us really are, how can we make a decision like that? I'm not sure we get a choice, anyway." He rubs his eyes.

[victormakesart]

"Don't think we do, yeah. I mean, I still have the book," she says, tightening her fingers around the cover. She has this bizarre image of story time to help the train ride pass. And that reminds her, for the briefest blink (quick as the flickering of that light, right there) of reading stories to children in bright, candy-colored rooms. "It feels like an inevitability."

[tictoctictoc]

Brandon nods at Addy, watching her hands tighten around the book she's kept. He wishes now he still had his. He never even saw the title.

"What do you really remember?" he asks his companions. "Not what you've read about, but what's in your head that you know is true? I've got...images, but they're like pieces of a puzzle that don't link together."

[call_me_rat]

Shaking his head, Russel leans forward to rest his forearms across his knees. He's a little too tall to fit comfortably in the seats, and if he leans back it puts his head uncomfortable against the raised metal frame at the top of the car window. "I... don't know. Just bits and pieces. I know music, I guess... and I knew Willie." Just after he says it, he wonders why that's in past tense. He rubs his face again. He needs a shave, and he feels ragged and grimy and old. He feels like a bum. He doesn't voice that part, though, not yet.

[victormakesart]

"I don't know for sure. My pictures don't make sense either. I remember long pants, shapeless shirts. A great big bird face. I, I... sort of remember the little person. I think I was an artist? The chapter titles say I was, anyway, but I can't draw. At least, this me can't draw." She rests her head gently back against the glass, and it's cold, and she appreciates this. She silently thanks whoever came up with thermal reactions. "What do you remember?"

[tictoctictoc]

"I remember a girl dressed up like a doll," he says, glancing over at Russel. "And I remember watches and clocks. All the little bits and pieces and gears and how they go together. I...I used to talk to them," he says, recalling. "Like they were people."

Hm. Maybe his other self is a little crazy.

"And I remember the Strangers. I remember them coming after me in a dark place, and I tried to fight them. But they picked me up and threw me and...I think I died." His voice fades to a whisper.

[call_me_rat]

"Have you tried drawing?" Russel eyes her briefly, but Brandon's comment makes him wince. Strangers, and the city falling apart, it all feels familiar. He remembers... death, yes, lots of death.

Rat shakes his head and pushes the memories away. "Can't have. You're still here."