If you love me, or REALLY care about me, u wont mind reading this long entry
ok, its like this... yesterday i ended up going to the fireworks w/Susan after all, (at 1st i wasnt going to) but darrick said he'd bring me back if my uncle took me. Darrick picked me up at 10mile at a gas station. when we got there, i saw Jessie and scared him and Susan came up to me and we hugged 4 like about 3mins straight w/o letting each other go, we made jokes, and alot of stuff and yadda yadda. so then we went to Susans house and then to Krystals house, Kaitlyn and Sam kept doin that "lesbian marshmellow" stuff ^^; and Sam 4 some reason kept licking ppls faces and all that crazy stuff. And like always, Jessie and Kaitlyn had problems w/ each other. During the fireworks, Susan wanted to sit on the grass, i didnt get it at first, but i did it anyway cuz she asked me to. Then when we got on the ground she sits right infront of me and leans back. (of course at that moment i felt just as stupid as the next person, so i opened my legs and let her lean back again) so me and susan are sitting there cuddling and watchin the fireworks, kissin,sayin "i love u", u know all that stuff ^_^. Then Kaitlyn comes to me and tells me that her and Jessie are havin problems, and i wasnt gonna say ok and leave it to her, so i got up from cuddlin w/susan......ROAR!..... AND I SAID... "Give me one second" i went to Jessie... talked, and then its all yet another missunderstanding between those two. Theyre both mad about stuff that the other 1 doesnt understand, so i took thenm in a room and told them how the other 1 felt Jessie kept tryin to walk away and in the end i grabbed him and said, "No, you stay in here, you two just stare at each other for 20 sec. if u two dont do anything within that time, you can both leave, and i went back to susan and this took until the fireworks was OVER ! ......ROAR!!!!!...... so then i sit outside the house w/ susan, and i'll be damn! Jessie's ass walks out after the 20 sec.!!!! so i was pissed off after i completely wasted my time on those 2 when i coulda been w/ susan. so eventually Jessie walks to the back of the house and calls Susans cell and tlks to Kaitlyn from the back of the house, and he tells her to come to the back. THEN THEY RESOLVED IT. I know Susan was kinda upset that i kept leavin her 4 them but if i didnt help, they'd give me shit. So we get ready to go back to Susans house and we ride in her moms car, Darrick stays to clean up, we get back to her house after it all and me and her lay on her bed and Darrick comes back at 12:00 midnight and says come on, i get up and leave susan on her bed, i eet in the kitchen and he says hes taking me home and to call my uncle. I go back to her bed room and get my book, and i say "Im gone Kitten" she says "aawww" and i kiss her while shes laying down, since she was tired, i didnt really think she had it in her to get up. i go outside and darrick says "i'll meet u in the car" and goes into the garage after like 1 min of staring at it, i remember he told me to call my uncle. and i wanted another excuse to see susan so i went to ask if i could use her phone. OK PEOPLE, THIS IS THE PART THAT FUCKS ME ALL UP. I went to her room door and its locked and i say, "hey dont lock me out" I didnt think she heard me, so i knock on her door and wait 4 about 5 sec, and she opens the door, Im smiling and i get ready to say something but then I look at her face and i see two tears, one from each eye on her face, and i pause and say "Hey, why are u crying?".. and it took about 5 sec. for her to answer cuz she was just staring at me and finally she says "I..... I just dont want you to leave"...... so i hug her and she hugs me tight not wanting to let me go and still sniffling a little bit... i try to cheer her up by sayin "come on, i'll... i'll see you later".... We both know my mom and we both know its gonna be LATER alright, I started to let go, but she just held me tighter when i started to, so I held her back. i asked can i use her phone and she says "its over there" and points to her table. so i get her phone and i dial the number and hold her at the same time, cuz i knew she wanted to keep me to her as long as possible. i held her until Steven knocks on the window, then i tell her " I have to go" so i slowly back away and she looks at me as if she was gonna die if i wasnt there w/her all night. I kissed her and told her i loved her, and I tried to get her to smile, it wouldnt work, and her face got longer and longer evry second i stepped from the door, I could feel her tears coming back, but i figured if i prolonged it any more, it would make her even more sad that i was leaving, plus Darrick would come in there mad and we'd both be in trouble so i got out of there and Steve said "come on fucker" and i said "i had to call my Uncle" he says "oh" and i go to the car, and i get home at exactly 1:00am