And we're back...
After, I'd say about a 3-4 year hiatus of regular updating on Livejournal... WE'RE BACK!
My last exam is tomorrow, so we're changing this layout to something less dark and brooding, and it'll be back to regular broadcasts of the life at age almost 20.
There's a couple of reasons why I'm choosing to come back is that for a long while:
- I unhealthily stopped expression of a lot of emotions, speech, reflections and opinions, which didn't help me as a person, and probably contributed to many a night spent wondering what the hell was wrong with me. Mix that with being brickwalled and the 'It's going to be ok, will you shut up if I change the subject?' attitude, it's not the sort of thing I was made for.
- As a social person, I'm open, which in turn makes me vulnerable. And people have taken advantage of me like through that means. But that's me. I'm that sort of person who will go up to someone, introduce myself, shake their hand and invite them to chat about whatever is on their mind. But the world is a big place, and I believe the good in people, no matter who they are or where they're from. This is my life. I'll do whatever the hell I feel like and I'm gonna share it!.
- Along the way I thought I 'grew up' and I didn't need to keep some petty journal. It seemed such a pre-teen thing to do, since I technically have been blogging since I was about 12 (I was on another blog site previous to LJ). Unfortunately, that forced block contributed to the more bitter, cynical and anti-social path of evolution I took. I've had some very dark moments in my life and I've kept them to myself. It's only recently I've rediscovered how good it actually is to write things down.
- I need to get back to my roots. Remember the person I actually was all those years ago. I wasn't entirely happy, but I had the right mind set more often than not. I complained a lot, but that is basically what teenage angst is.
I should be studying right now considering I have the Medical Bacteriology/Molecular Pathogenesis exam tomorrow. It seems like everyone is shitting themselves about this one, and in particular Naomi Bishop's section. Though, straight after we're all hitting the Eagle Bar for Cassie's birthday.
On a personal note, coming out of 2 relationship while on hiatus from Livejournal, has changed me as a person. It's made my skin a bit more thicker, made me a bit more stronger and hasn't changed my resolve that there are good people still in this world. Where actions speak louder than worlds and that after being turned into a doormat and having shit smeared in my face by the unstable, I still have plenty of reason to love another... and work on loving myself.
Thank God. I'm still me. I'm still breathing and alive, as opposed to the many times and opportunities I could have taken my own life, or worse, become the 'living dead' in where I would be just existing.
Welcome back, me.
- Kalika
My last exam is tomorrow, so we're changing this layout to something less dark and brooding, and it'll be back to regular broadcasts of the life at age almost 20.
There's a couple of reasons why I'm choosing to come back is that for a long while:
- I unhealthily stopped expression of a lot of emotions, speech, reflections and opinions, which didn't help me as a person, and probably contributed to many a night spent wondering what the hell was wrong with me. Mix that with being brickwalled and the 'It's going to be ok, will you shut up if I change the subject?' attitude, it's not the sort of thing I was made for.
- As a social person, I'm open, which in turn makes me vulnerable. And people have taken advantage of me like through that means. But that's me. I'm that sort of person who will go up to someone, introduce myself, shake their hand and invite them to chat about whatever is on their mind. But the world is a big place, and I believe the good in people, no matter who they are or where they're from. This is my life. I'll do whatever the hell I feel like and I'm gonna share it!.
- Along the way I thought I 'grew up' and I didn't need to keep some petty journal. It seemed such a pre-teen thing to do, since I technically have been blogging since I was about 12 (I was on another blog site previous to LJ). Unfortunately, that forced block contributed to the more bitter, cynical and anti-social path of evolution I took. I've had some very dark moments in my life and I've kept them to myself. It's only recently I've rediscovered how good it actually is to write things down.
- I need to get back to my roots. Remember the person I actually was all those years ago. I wasn't entirely happy, but I had the right mind set more often than not. I complained a lot, but that is basically what teenage angst is.
I should be studying right now considering I have the Medical Bacteriology/Molecular Pathogenesis exam tomorrow. It seems like everyone is shitting themselves about this one, and in particular Naomi Bishop's section. Though, straight after we're all hitting the Eagle Bar for Cassie's birthday.
On a personal note, coming out of 2 relationship while on hiatus from Livejournal, has changed me as a person. It's made my skin a bit more thicker, made me a bit more stronger and hasn't changed my resolve that there are good people still in this world. Where actions speak louder than worlds and that after being turned into a doormat and having shit smeared in my face by the unstable, I still have plenty of reason to love another... and work on loving myself.
Thank God. I'm still me. I'm still breathing and alive, as opposed to the many times and opportunities I could have taken my own life, or worse, become the 'living dead' in where I would be just existing.
Welcome back, me.
- Kalika