(no subject)
i need sleep but i cant. I havent had a panic attack in years, why fucking now. i need every facility to pull myself out of the negative. its not fair that it abadones me now, i need to keepp controll. i miss her so much i cant think straight. ive been too close to losing her, and i keep snapping. i just need a job. everything wi be ok then... even if its too late... i will have still become better. i dont care what she said, shes the only reason i have for being a better person. im not good enough now, but i will be. i dont even know why im typing on Lj, i fucking hate pitty. i need to do something to keep controll. i love her. ive said a thousand times. shes so worth it. focus. sleep. monday. i dont care if i work for mcdonalds with their poisonous fries. i have to do more.
from trainspotting:
The truth is that I'm a bad person. But, that's gonna change -- I'm going to chage. This is the last of that sort of thing. Now I'm cleaning up and I'm moving on, going straight and choosing life. I'm looking forward to it already. I'm gonna be just like you.The job, the family, the fucking big television. The washing machine, the car, the compact disc and electric tin opener, good health, low cholesterol, dental insurance, mortgage, starter home, leisure wear, luggage, three piece suite, DIY, game shows, junk food, children, walks in the park, nine to five, good at golf, washing the car, choice of sweaters, family Christmas, indexed pension, tax exemption clearing gutters, getting by, looking ahead, the day you die.
from trainspotting:
The truth is that I'm a bad person. But, that's gonna change -- I'm going to chage. This is the last of that sort of thing. Now I'm cleaning up and I'm moving on, going straight and choosing life. I'm looking forward to it already. I'm gonna be just like you.The job, the family, the fucking big television. The washing machine, the car, the compact disc and electric tin opener, good health, low cholesterol, dental insurance, mortgage, starter home, leisure wear, luggage, three piece suite, DIY, game shows, junk food, children, walks in the park, nine to five, good at golf, washing the car, choice of sweaters, family Christmas, indexed pension, tax exemption clearing gutters, getting by, looking ahead, the day you die.