new fic
Story Title: When You're Dating A Vulcan
Story Type: Slash, Humor
Characters: Jim Kirk, Spock, mentions of Uhura, Scotty
Pairings: Kirk/Spock
Rating: PG-13/NC-17
Fandom: Star Trek:2009
Series: None
Disclaimer: These guys are definitely not mine. It doesn't take a genius to figure that out, does it?
Warnings: Slash, language, humor
A/N: So, this is for energy_purple; it's part of a fic trade and I absolutely can't wait to get my dirty little hands on the Guns fic I'm getting in return for this. Since she loves Captain Sexy Pants and First Officer Sexy Ears as much as I do, I thought I'd venture into this fandom for her. Hope you like it, sweetie.
If there was anything Jim Kirk was an expert on -besides the Enterprise, of course- it was Vulcans. Or, more accurately, half-Vulcans. Especially half-Vulcans named Spock.
From the first time he had met those dark brown eyes across the room at his Kobayashi Maru hearing, Jim had been done for. He had wanted to hate the stuck up Vulcan with the attitude problem, but he hadn't been able to. Not even when he had brought up George Kirk -which always pissed Jim off; he never knew the guy, but he still managed to lurk over Jim's whole fucken life- and Jim had scrambled to keep up with the logic the Vulcan was throwing at him.
He hadn't been able to believe that no one else had seen the anger those eyes, the distaste in his voice as he pretty much cursed Jim the fuck out -without using a single curse word, in any language. Why said cursing out had the effect of making him hard, Jim didn't know; but as he met Spock's eyes, he knew he wasn't the only one effected.
Almost two years later, and after lots of opportunities -both on and off duty- to study it, Jim realized that Spock's voice could get him aroused by talking about paint drying if he wasn't careful.
(Let's just say there was one incident at a planet where they were securing a treaty and Jim had let his control slip for a minute while he was listening to Spock explain what the Prime Directive was and the Angorlians had been perfectly understanding about the whole thing, so there was no need to ever bring it up again.)
By the time the time they started dating -which was 6 months, 2 weeks and 4 days since they first met at the trial; Spock had told him when he asked earlier, completely bemused when Jim had burst into laughter- Jim had slipped over into Obsessed-ville and he had eagerly watched everything his First Officer did.
Jim wasn't surprised that his command crew -except for Spock- had picked up on his observations and started gambling on them down in Engineering with Scotty in charge of keeping track of the bets. He was surprised, however, when Uhura stopped him in the corridor and told him that she had a hundred credits on him and Spock getting together by the end of the year and urged him to get on with it already; none of his exes had ever been that nice, that was for sure.
Because of his prolonged study of Spock -before and after they started dating- Jim knew his half-Vulcans and he could give a damn lecture about them if he had to.
Jim knew, for instance, that dating was ridiculously easy with Vulcans (once they got past that whole “I-need-a-logical-reason-to-want-you” thing); if they wanted to date you, they simply showed up at your quarters -or house, wherever you happened to live- and told you they wanted to date. If you said “no' -which, in Jim's opinion, you'd have to be completely fucken retarded to do- they simply nodded, and everything went back to the status quo.
Once you agreed, any time you were in each others company, even if it was work related, it was considered a date. If both parties were agreeable to it continuing after the first month or so, they became exclusive and after that -well, he doesn't have to spell it out, does he? Oh, and for the record, holding hands, in public (read: in front of other Vulcans), is the same as making out and is considered a tacit agreement to get married as soon as possible.
Jim also knew that while Vulcans claimed to have no emotions, it was bullshit; although, anyone on the Enterprise's command crew could call bullshit on that one -they were there when Spock choked him in a non-fun way (it's really part of the irony of Jim's life that he discovered a hitherto unknown choking kink in the middle of a crisis and in front of his future friends).
Even if they didn't show it, Vulcan emotions ran deep; after seeing Spock's eyes burning with both rage and passion, and felt that superior strength used against him -in a myriad of different ways, only one of them in the non-fun way- and that one time where those weird flower things made Spock completely lose his shit and destroy the immediate vicinity; after seeing all that, Jim could understand the idea behind trying to control themselves. He just thought they went a little too extreme with it -but that was a debate for another time; mainly for when he wants to get his Vulcan riled up and attack him in a very fun way.
And Jim knew that Spock would never be one to declare his emotions -in public or private. In fact, his usual response to Jim's semi-regular “I love you” was, “It is logical that you feel this emotion for me considering that we are bonded.” Which was Spock-speak for, “I love you more then anything else in this entire universe, t'hy'la.” Not everyone could deal with that, Jim knew that, but he could feel everything Spock couldn't say to him through their bond and he couldn't understand why people would still need words on top of that.
Jim knew all that -and a lot more things that would blow people's minds; Pon Farr, anyone?- but, what he knows the most, is that Spock will always be by his side. Maybe not the way that most humans would want or need, but, then, James T, Kirk has never been like most humans.