Story Title: Just Admit It
Story Type: Slash
Characters: Chris Sabin, Alex Shelley, AJ Styles, Samoa Joe, Jay Lethal
Pairings: MMG
Rating: PG-13/NC-17
Series: None
Disclaimer: They're still not my property; damn that no slavery law. They belong only to themselves and TNA.
Warnings: Slash, language
A/N: So, I got this idea from an unwritten fic meme that
candy_belle did; check it out
here. No real timeline for this one, just that it's before the boys got injured. Enjoy, peeps.
“I don't know why you guys bother to deny it,” Jay said, tying the laces on his boots and standing up.
“And I don't know what the fuck you're talking about, jack off,” Alex commented, arranging himself so he was leaning against Chris while he was trying to get his kick pads on. At Chris's exasperated look, he snickered and let more of his weight rest against Chris's side.
“Look, we all know it,” he went on, waving a hand around to include the whole room. “You guys should just sleep together and get that shit over with. It's obvious that you guys have the hots for each other.”
Chris just rolled his eyes; it wasn't the first time he'd heard that, and he intended to do the same thing he always did when someone said something about it: completely ignore it. And if he felt a flicker of something at Jay's words, he ignored that, too. It wasn't too hard -he'd had a lot of practice at it.
“Fuck off, Lethal,” Chris told him, shoving Alex off the bench and onto the floor. “Yeah, it's not our fault no one can stand to be around you for longer then three seconds and you don't recognize friendly affection when it's in front of your face,” Alex added, picking himself up off the floor and kicking Chris as he walked past him to go to his own bag.
“For fuck's sake, Sabin, I'm fine!” Alex yelled at his partner as he stormed into the bathroom.
He knew Chris was just trying to be a good friend, he knew that; but that had been the fifth time Chris had asked him how he was. Normally, he would have milked Chris's sympathy for everything it was worth, but every time Chris asked him if he was alright, Alex got a weird feeling in the pit of his stomach at the anguished look in Chris's eyes.
Alex didn't know what that feeling was -and he didn't want to find out, either. He was happy with the status quo, thank you very much. You know exactly what that feeling is, a tiny part of his brain told him gleefully. Alex sneered and told that part of him to go fuck off.
“Excuse me for fucken caring about whether you got hurt,” Chris told him, a trace of bitterness in his voice.
That's always been the problem, hasn't it? I've always cared more then you have.
Chris shook his head, trying to clear the thought from his mind; it refused to fade, though, and lingered, forcing Chris to face it.
“Jesus Christ, Sabin, it was accident,” Alex told him, going back over to his bed. “You've kicked me before and you've never been this worked up about it. What the fuck is wrong with you tonight?”
“Trust me, you don't want to know,” Chris muttered, his voice raw. The knowledge of the realization that just hit him was bouncing around his brain and he just wanted it to go away. He wanted it to disappear because he couldn't deal with this now -or ever, for that matter.
How the fuck could he have been in love with his best friend and not know it?
“No, tell me, Chris,” Alex spit out, his own control in shreds from the feelings battering at him. They scared the shit out of him, and he did what he always did when he was afraid -he lashed out at the people who meant the most to him. “I'm curious to know why you're acting like such a little bitch tonight.”
By this time, they were inches away from each other, both of them furious and ready to come to blows.
“You really want to know, 'Lex?” Chris snarled and before Alex could answer, Chris had grabbed the front of his shirt and pulled him against his body and kissed him.
After a startled second, Alex moaned and started kissing Chris back. It was rough and violent, their teeth clashing together and their tongues battling for dominance. Despite the violence of it, it was the best kiss of Alex's life. It was that thought that had him pulling back.
He licked his lips, tasting Chris on them and bit back a moan. He could feel his dick pushing against his jeans and he looked helplessly at his best friend. Ale saw the same things in Chris's eyes that he was feeling; fear, lust, desperation, and underneath it, a love that had been there for years.
Alex opened his mouth and closed it again, not sure what he was going to say. He could feel the fear that was pounding at him again, and for the first time since Chris had known him, he turned and ran away from him, slamming the door behind him and leaving Chris staring at it.
It took Chris ten minutes to decide to go after him; he had hesitated only that long because he couldn't find his sneakers right away.
Once he was downstairs, he went into the bar to see if Alex had been there. When he spotted AJ and Joe he headed straight for them.
“Have you guys seen Shelley?” Chris asked.
“Yeah, he left with some rat a few minutes ago,” Joe answered, exchanging a look with AJ.
“Did he?” Chris snarled, turning and stalking over to the bar.
After grabbing the hand of the first girl to meet his eyes, Chris dragged her out of the hotel bar and upstairs; we can both play this game, he thought with venom.
“God, I wish they'd stop dancing around it,” AJ muttered, sipping his beer.
Joe nodded and sighed a little; he only hoped they'd be able to work it out.
Alex stopped in the hall as he heard voices coming from his and Chris's hotel room.
“Who's Alex?” A girl's voice asked.
There was a pause, then, “Get out.”
Alex raised an eyebrow at Chris's tone, surprised at how harsh it was. Apparently, so was the rat.
“What?”
“You got what you wanted,” Chris told her, his voice hard. “Now get the fuck out.”
“I deserve to know why you called me someone else's name during sex.”
Chris laughed but there was no joy in it, only a bitter kind of resignation. “Deserve? What you deserve is exactly what you got: a quick fuck, followed by me telling you to get the fuck out.
“I suggest you do it fast; I'm not in the mood for this fucken bullshit, and trust me when I tell you that you weren't nearly good enough for me to even contemplate listening to you whine for the rest of the night. Hell, you're lucky I haven't thrown you out yet.”
The door slammed shut, and she came down the hall toward Alex. She glanced at him but didn't say anything. Either she didn't recognize him, or was too embarrassed, because she hurried up past him. Alex barely noticed; he was semi shocked by the fact that she had the same eyes as he did -well, the color and shape were right anyway.
Alex couldn't believe it -except that he could. The chick he had fucked had blue eyes -not exactly the same shade as Chris's, but close enough that he could pretend it was Chris looking back at him.
Fuck. When had it happened? When had he fallen in love with his best friend?
He dragged his feet on the short trip down the rest of the hall to their room. Alex couldn't find an answer, couldn't bring himself to ignore it or to wish it away. He was suddenly, inexplicably, tired of hiding from himself.
He didn't know what he expected when he opened the door and stepped inside, but it definitely wasn't Chris leaning back against the headboard, in only his boxers, looking both desperate and sad, his eyes closed and his hands fisted in the sheet on the bed.
“Hey, man,” Alex said as he let the door close behind him. “What's up?”
At the sound of Alex's voice, Chris had started and looked over at him, but in seconds his face was blank, his expression serene. Alex had always known Chris had had excellent control of himself, and he had always admired it, but he had never known it was this good. If he hadn't seen Chris's expression a minute ago himself, he would never have believed it. It made Alex wonder what else Chris had been hiding.
“Hey,” Chris echoed, his voice bland. “I was just getting ready to crash.”
Alex nodded, hating how uncomfortable he was. This was his best friend, for fuck's sake. Even if he was in love with him -and part of Alex cringed at even the thought of it but the rest of him was resigned to it; had, in fact, known it for years- he should be able to talk to Chris. No matter how pissed they were at each other, and after almost ten years, there had been a couple times when they'd come to blows over things, they'd always been able to talk once they'd calmed down.
He took a step closer to Chris's bed, pausing when Chris turned to face him. There was a flicker in Chris's eyes, a brief second of sadness, before everything was as smooth as glass. And Alex knew if he didn't say anything, if he kept walking straight past Chris into the bathroom, and didn't bring earlier up, didn't mention that kiss that had completely turned him inside out, that had completely stripped away all his shields away; he knew if he didn't say anything, Chris would let it go. It would never come up again and everything would go back to normal.
Except that he would know he was in love with Chris and, unless he'd misread Chris completely, Chris was in love with him. And he wasn't sure if he could ignore that again.
And, even if he could, did he want to? Did he want to spend the next god knew how many years longing for someone he could have now? Could he handle seeing Chris with someone else; someone like Jamie, who had set Alex's teeth on edge from the moment she had started dating Chris until they had broken up earlier this year.
Could he handle all that? And could he really handle the fact that it would all be because he was too much of a pussy to take those last couple steps to Chris and admit how he felt?
Suddenly desperate, Alex went to the edge of Chris's bed and stared down at him. “Chris, I can't - I -” Alex stammered before closing his eyes and whispering, “I love you.”
There was a pause and then Alex was being pressed against the mattress, Chris's body on top of his. Chris looked down at him, his expression fierce and Alex was stunned by the depth of feeling that was in his gaze. He had known Chris was in love with him, but he hadn't expected it to be this strong, this deep. He wondered briefly what Chris could see in his eyes and hoped it would be enough for him.
Chris searched his eyes and then grinned, dipping his head down for a quick kiss before he pulled back and started nuzzling Alex's neck.
“I love you, too, fucktard,” Chris murmured, kissing him again. Alex moaned, fisting his hands in Chris's hair and kissing him back.
This time when Chris stopped, Alex groaned in disappointment, trying to tug him back down.
“I need to take a shower,” Chris told him, placing biting kisses along his jaw. “When we finally have sex, I don't want to do it smelling like a whore house.”
He got off of Alex, ignoring Alex's pained whimper with a smirk and started toward the bathroom.
Alex snorted; now that Chris mentioned it, Alex could smell the sickly sweet scent of perfume on him and he realized he didn't like it.
“We'll do it in my bed,” he blurted out, staring at Chris when he turned to him and raised an eyebrow.
“Possessive much, 'Lex?” Chris asked, amused. He gave him a lazy smile that didn't match the gleam in his eyes. “That's fine, but it goes both ways.”
As soon as he heard the shower go on, Alex got up off of the bed, stripping out of his clothes as he walked over to his bed. He pulled the covers back before he cautiously sniffed his own arm and winced; Chris wasn't the only one who needed a shower.
With an evil grin on his face, Alex went into the bathroom, briefly scowling at the huge amount of steam. Chris liked his showers scalding hot, something he wasn't looking forward to. Alex chuckled and crept toward the shower; he'd just have to make sure he did something to keep his mind off of the water temperature.
When he pulled back the shower curtain, Chris looked over at him, surprise on his face before he noticed Alex was naked.
“Want to take a picture, 'Lex?” Chris smirked, turning around so he could face him, the hot water beating down on his shoulders and back.
“I would, but my camera's at my house,” Alex told him, real regret in his voice. Christ, how the fuck had he never noticed just how hot his partner was? A picture would definitely be worth a thousand words in Chris's case.
Without any hesitation, Alex got in the shower and dropped to his knees, leaning forward to lick and bite at the defined hip bones of his best friend.
Chris moaned, threading his hands through Alex's hair. Alex took his time; placing kisses along Chris's waistline and pausing to lick the water from his skin.
He nuzzled the base of Chris's dick, closing his eyes briefly as he inhaled Chris's musky scent. Pulling back, he looked up at Chris and drew his tongue up the of Chris's cock, loving the choked whimper that left Chris when he started playing with the head.
“'Lex,” Chris rasped out, his hands tightening in Alex's hair. “Fuck. I can't...”
Alex smirked and without any warning, took Chris's dick into his mouth and didn't stop until he felt Chris hit the back of his throat.
“Holy fuck,” Chris barely managed to choke out.
He could feel the familiar tightening in his groin that told him he was close to getting off. But he was damned if he got there before Alex did.
Chris moaned as Alex drew back up his cock, using his tongue to trace patterns on the head.
“Motherfucker,” Chris cursed, before he pulled Alex by his hair and shoved him against the tiles and ravaging his mouth.
Stopping for a minute to turn off the water, Chris pushed his hair off of his forehead and raked his eyes down his best friends body. He bit his lip when he saw Alex's dick, hard and ready. He tore his eyes off of it and took in the rest of Alex's body.
“Jesus, 'Lex,” Chris breathed, his eyes slowly drifting down the defined chest, to the sculpted abs and the strong, muscled thighs. “You're fucken gorgeous.”
Alex shook his head but before he could say anything Chris covered his mouth, cutting off any reply he might have made.
Chris pulled away from him and stepped out of the shower. He grabbed Alex's wrist and pulled, making him trip over the bathtub as he was yanked along behind Chris.
He stopped in front of Alex's bed and shoved him, crawling on top of Alex once his back hit the mattress.
Alex shuddered, the feel of Chris on top of him almost too much for him to process; being with a guy wasn't a new thing for Alex -he might prefer girls but he had been attracted to a few guys in the past. This wasn't just some guy, it was Chris and he had never thought of Chris like that,
For a brief second Alex wondered if that hadn't been a deliberate over sight on his part. After all, if he ignored how attractive Chris was he wouldn't have to admit that he wanted him as more then a friend.
Chris bit his shoulder and Alex moaned, completely losing track of everything except the man on top of him.
Later on, Chris curled up behind Alex and threw his arm around Alex's waist possessively.
“So, are we going out or whatever?” Alex asked, wincing a little at how awkward the words sounded when he felt anything but.
Chris just chuckled and dropped a kiss on his shoulder. “We're us, 'Lex.”
Alex smiled and closed his eyes. That sounded good to him.