MEIN EYES! THEY BURNSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS! THEY BURNSSSS THE PRECIOUS!
Two weeks ago, man-tiara started falling apart. This shouldn't have surprised anyone, since I've had those glasses (well, that frame, anyway) since I was fifteen. While they've served me well in the last nine or so years, I think that even the best frames can only last for so long before they start to fall apart. My poor glasses unfortunately, were no exception. Being reasonably broke (like a good grad student should be) I went to my parents for help. The conversation that followed led me down and winding road that ultimately resulted in a masked man taking a scalpel to my eye. I'll get to that part later, though. First, the conversation:
'Blash: Uh, Mom? Dad? The temple on my glasses fell off. Do you know where I could get these repaired?
Dad: Give it up, son. Nobody will replace those. Get yourself a new pair of glasses.
'Blash: New glasses cost moneys, though! Moneys that I don't have! ;.;
Mom: Wow. Sucks to be you.
'Blash: Well, could I have some help with replacing these, then?
Mom: Nope.
Dad: Nope. It's gonna cost us a few hundred dollars. You should have signed up for optical insurance.
'Blash: So, I'm on my own then?
Mom: Yep. Unless...
'Blash: Unless...?
Dad: UNLESS YOU LET PEOPLE SHOOT LASERS IN YOUR EYE! BOOYAH!
'Blash: You mean, like LASIK?
Mom: Exactly.
'Blash: ...And, um...how much is that going to cost me, again?
Dad: Somewhere in the neighborhood of ~$3,000.
'Blash: WHAT?!? I CAN'T AFFORD THAT!
Mom: We can!
'Blash: So, um, couldn't you just get me a new pair of glasses, then?
Dad: No, they're too expensive. It's lasers or nothing, son.
'Blash: ...
'Blash: o.O;
'Blash: -_-;
'Blash: *sigh* Fine. Thanks, I guess.
Now, you've got to understand something about me. I hate putting things in my eyes. I get fidgety with eyedrops, and given how light sensitive my eyes are, I'm weird about anything shining into them. Needless to say, the consult was not a happy experience for me. Between the blinding lights, the people holding my eyes open, multitudes of eye drops, and my own heightened sense of anxiety, I was freaking out. In retrospect, the entire experience wasn't too bad. At that moment in time though, I was in agony.
...Despite the harrowing consult though, I decided to go through the procedure anyway. The doctors had prescribed some Valium for me to use on the day of the surgery, so I hoped that it would eliminate most of the anxiety I felt going in. Besides, it was free, and I had nothing to lose, right? RIGHT?!? Well, I hoped not. The waiver I signed prior to the procedure did nothing to ease my discomfort, though.
I showed up at the LASIK center at about 2:00 yesterday. After about two hours of waiting and prepping (mostly waiting), they finally ushered me in, put a shower cap on my head, handed me a teddy bear to hold on to, and and directed me to a chair, all the while reassuring me everything was going to be okay.
I mustn't have believed them, because I was trembling the entire time. I was beyond anxious now. I was scared out of my wits. The Valium substitute they'd given me had failed epically. I don't think that teddy bear had been squeezed so hard in its life.
They started out by putting eyelid speculum on each of my eyes to hold them open. That was uncomfortable. Next they turned a vacuum on to stop the flow of blood to my eye. That was scary. Finally, they scraped a thin layer off the top of my cornea with a specialized scalpel. That was mortifying.
...By the time they'd repeated the procedure on both eyes though, I'd calmed down significantly. While it was somewhat uncomfortable (AND BLINDING! OH, I HATES THE LIGHTS!), it was nowhere near as bad as I thought it was going to be. The rest of the procedure involved me starting into a bright light while the surgeons shot lasers into my cornea and fiddled with who-knows-what.
...All in all it took about fifteen minutes, and the difference was noticeable immediately afterwards. While things were still a little blurry afterward, I didn't need glasses afterwards. That, admittedly, was kinda nifty.
I came home as soon as the procedure was over and slept for a couple of hours. When I woke up, my eyes were on FIRE. My eyes were even more light sensitive after I woke up than they'd been previously. It sucked, but it wasn't anything that a few eyedrops couldn't fix. My eyes are fine now, except for a few blotches of blood in each eye from the suction yesterday. I've included a picture below for the morbidly curious.
After inquiring about it at my follow-up today though, I've heard that it's perfectly natural, and better yet, my eyes are healing wonderfully. Yay for that much, I guess! I'm still adjusting to the four different types of eye-drops that I need to routinely put in my eyes for the next week, but other than that, I think I'm just happy I can see again. Yay!
♥
'Blash: Uh, Mom? Dad? The temple on my glasses fell off. Do you know where I could get these repaired?
Dad: Give it up, son. Nobody will replace those. Get yourself a new pair of glasses.
'Blash: New glasses cost moneys, though! Moneys that I don't have! ;.;
Mom: Wow. Sucks to be you.
'Blash: Well, could I have some help with replacing these, then?
Mom: Nope.
Dad: Nope. It's gonna cost us a few hundred dollars. You should have signed up for optical insurance.
'Blash: So, I'm on my own then?
Mom: Yep. Unless...
'Blash: Unless...?
Dad: UNLESS YOU LET PEOPLE SHOOT LASERS IN YOUR EYE! BOOYAH!
'Blash: You mean, like LASIK?
Mom: Exactly.
'Blash: ...And, um...how much is that going to cost me, again?
Dad: Somewhere in the neighborhood of ~$3,000.
'Blash: WHAT?!? I CAN'T AFFORD THAT!
Mom: We can!
'Blash: So, um, couldn't you just get me a new pair of glasses, then?
Dad: No, they're too expensive. It's lasers or nothing, son.
'Blash: ...
'Blash: o.O;
'Blash: -_-;
'Blash: *sigh* Fine. Thanks, I guess.
Now, you've got to understand something about me. I hate putting things in my eyes. I get fidgety with eyedrops, and given how light sensitive my eyes are, I'm weird about anything shining into them. Needless to say, the consult was not a happy experience for me. Between the blinding lights, the people holding my eyes open, multitudes of eye drops, and my own heightened sense of anxiety, I was freaking out. In retrospect, the entire experience wasn't too bad. At that moment in time though, I was in agony.
...Despite the harrowing consult though, I decided to go through the procedure anyway. The doctors had prescribed some Valium for me to use on the day of the surgery, so I hoped that it would eliminate most of the anxiety I felt going in. Besides, it was free, and I had nothing to lose, right? RIGHT?!? Well, I hoped not. The waiver I signed prior to the procedure did nothing to ease my discomfort, though.
I showed up at the LASIK center at about 2:00 yesterday. After about two hours of waiting and prepping (mostly waiting), they finally ushered me in, put a shower cap on my head, handed me a teddy bear to hold on to, and and directed me to a chair, all the while reassuring me everything was going to be okay.
I mustn't have believed them, because I was trembling the entire time. I was beyond anxious now. I was scared out of my wits. The Valium substitute they'd given me had failed epically. I don't think that teddy bear had been squeezed so hard in its life.
They started out by putting eyelid speculum on each of my eyes to hold them open. That was uncomfortable. Next they turned a vacuum on to stop the flow of blood to my eye. That was scary. Finally, they scraped a thin layer off the top of my cornea with a specialized scalpel. That was mortifying.
...By the time they'd repeated the procedure on both eyes though, I'd calmed down significantly. While it was somewhat uncomfortable (AND BLINDING! OH, I HATES THE LIGHTS!), it was nowhere near as bad as I thought it was going to be. The rest of the procedure involved me starting into a bright light while the surgeons shot lasers into my cornea and fiddled with who-knows-what.
...All in all it took about fifteen minutes, and the difference was noticeable immediately afterwards. While things were still a little blurry afterward, I didn't need glasses afterwards. That, admittedly, was kinda nifty.
I came home as soon as the procedure was over and slept for a couple of hours. When I woke up, my eyes were on FIRE. My eyes were even more light sensitive after I woke up than they'd been previously. It sucked, but it wasn't anything that a few eyedrops couldn't fix. My eyes are fine now, except for a few blotches of blood in each eye from the suction yesterday. I've included a picture below for the morbidly curious.
After inquiring about it at my follow-up today though, I've heard that it's perfectly natural, and better yet, my eyes are healing wonderfully. Yay for that much, I guess! I'm still adjusting to the four different types of eye-drops that I need to routinely put in my eyes for the next week, but other than that, I think I'm just happy I can see again. Yay!
♥