feel free to ignore
me babbling about boys. or boy. and a poem.
i haven't been crazy about a boy in a long time. like not since middle school. this is sort of a crazy revelation for me, because "relationship" standards are definitely different then they were when i was 12.
that being said...
i'm a mess. completely. but in a good way. i'm going around listening to happy bouncy peppy music--much more then usual--and nothing has even happened. i talked to betsy--because who knows boy obsession better then betsy?--and she was like "it doesn't matter if nothing ever happens--it's still exciting!"
which is true. but i have to say...it's been so long. I'm 17. People in fifth grade have gotten more action then me. I was *lapped* in ten fingers. Yeah. I had one down, my roomate had 12. And the one I had down was that I had eaten a hamburger. I can go on and on about "oh something must be wrong with me". but now that I look at it, I mean, i've had the opportunity. To kiss guys, I mean. It's just that...the romantic sucker that I am...i still want it to be "special". And maybe, because it's 21st century North Shore, that doesn't happen anymore. Which would suck. Cuz then I guess I'll be waiting forever.
Sigh.
Anyway, I can't stop thinking about him. A guy left a post in my facebook honesty box that says "You're an amazing person who deserves something special." And just the possibility that it could be him was exciting.
Also: the mark of when I like a guy. Ha, I wrote the first love poem--sort of--since eighth grade. And okay, even if it sucks, it can't be as bad as the old ones.-shudder-
For You
I haven’t written a love poem
Since I was thirteen
And that’s not what I’m trying to do now
I don’t want to talk about all the ways
You’ve enhanced my life
I’m not writing a love poem
Because in order to do that
I’d have to know what love is
Or at least what it feels like
I’m not writing a love poem
I’ve never written a love poem
When I was thirteen, I wrote about what I thought was heartbreak
But it was just obsession
Really, I won’t write you a love poem
Because love poems are about anguish
And the pain of love and love lost
And the only thing I want to tell you
Is just how underrated
I think joy is
i haven't been crazy about a boy in a long time. like not since middle school. this is sort of a crazy revelation for me, because "relationship" standards are definitely different then they were when i was 12.
that being said...
i'm a mess. completely. but in a good way. i'm going around listening to happy bouncy peppy music--much more then usual--and nothing has even happened. i talked to betsy--because who knows boy obsession better then betsy?--and she was like "it doesn't matter if nothing ever happens--it's still exciting!"
which is true. but i have to say...it's been so long. I'm 17. People in fifth grade have gotten more action then me. I was *lapped* in ten fingers. Yeah. I had one down, my roomate had 12. And the one I had down was that I had eaten a hamburger. I can go on and on about "oh something must be wrong with me". but now that I look at it, I mean, i've had the opportunity. To kiss guys, I mean. It's just that...the romantic sucker that I am...i still want it to be "special". And maybe, because it's 21st century North Shore, that doesn't happen anymore. Which would suck. Cuz then I guess I'll be waiting forever.
Sigh.
Anyway, I can't stop thinking about him. A guy left a post in my facebook honesty box that says "You're an amazing person who deserves something special." And just the possibility that it could be him was exciting.
Also: the mark of when I like a guy. Ha, I wrote the first love poem--sort of--since eighth grade. And okay, even if it sucks, it can't be as bad as the old ones.-shudder-
For You
I haven’t written a love poem
Since I was thirteen
And that’s not what I’m trying to do now
I don’t want to talk about all the ways
You’ve enhanced my life
I’m not writing a love poem
Because in order to do that
I’d have to know what love is
Or at least what it feels like
I’m not writing a love poem
I’ve never written a love poem
When I was thirteen, I wrote about what I thought was heartbreak
But it was just obsession
Really, I won’t write you a love poem
Because love poems are about anguish
And the pain of love and love lost
And the only thing I want to tell you
Is just how underrated
I think joy is