(no subject)
Finally I'm back from Arizona. Actually I've been back in Washington for a week and at my house since Wednesday but i'm finally getting around to posting. I took god amounts of pictures and will post some of them when i figure out how to do so, haha. I've ended my friendship with Twitch since last time i posted. He's come to my school a few times and after he seemingly ended out friendship and showed up i broke down a bit and skipped the rest of my classes.... after that he tried to be all buddie buddie and it's not going to work. I find him disgusting now, i actually don't feel much else for him. I wrote him a poem a couple of nights ago i don't know if i'll give it to him but it felt good to get the words out. I wrote about 4 poems the other night, it felt really good to write again, i'll post 2 of the poems in a bit.
Blaine and i are doing great, i talked to him about taking a break and then decided against it. I don't want a break from him i want a change in my daily life. Everything is getting so repetative. I had a great time at his house though, finally got new pictures of him and i together ^.^
For the most part i'm doing pretty well. I don't know what else to say, haha.
I guess now i'll post the poems and pictures and then stop, haha.
I wrote this poem/song thing to people i used to call friends, the ones i used to turn to for support that did nothing but destroy me bit by bit.
Untitled
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I used to be addicted to your words,
I needed you to inject them into me nonstop,
Finally i went cold turkey now your poison makes me sick,
What i took for rainbows was only light reflecting off of the syringe,
What i though was euphoria was your poison flooding my veins,
Finally i kicked the habit,
I was able to throw you away,
Those words i thought were full of wisdom was only the smoke invading my brain,
I don't need you any more,
Your lies will feul me no longer,
I can make it without you,
I'll drink down the light instead of your cyanide,
I wish i could destroy you like you tried to do to me,
I want to force feed you what i once begged for,
My body hurts without you,
But my soul thrives,
Someday you will dissapate,
Evaporate,
Someday you will forever die and be forgoten,
Just like the poison laced lies you fed me have,
Just like my memories of you have.
This poem is for Twitch... You'll catch the drift
Purge
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I used to call you bro,
Used to hold you close to my heart,
What happened to the good times?
Where did the love go?
You threw my trust a way a few more times then once,
I won't let it happen again,
I trusted you to get better far more then a few times,
Instead you smoked it up and fucked that little whore,
You should have known what my reaction would be,
I'm simply not that forgiving,
I'm a vindictive little bitch with a male trust issue,
You can't make it better,
I can't trust the words that pour from your lips not to be poisoned,
I know i'm your little sister,
But the picture of you with the word brother has been purged from my eyes,
You hurt me deep,
Lost my trust,
I'm not that forgiving a person,
This will be the only way I speak to you now,
Through my personal words,
You will never see this,
Never know it exists,
Just like i sometimes wish our friendship never did,
You decided to binge on your sin and i have finally purged you from my system,
This is my final good bye,
You knew that i'm a vindictive little bitch with a male trust issue,
As these words flow from my pencil your image dies inside my mind,
This is my last good bye,
now i can flush you away.