[ALC]: Confessions of A Mr. Nice Guy
This entry was supposed to be before the "Hello, Mr. Nice Guy", but I decided to write the other one first. This is just an entry relating to the other parts, and asking questions..
Why is it that I am so sweet? All the guys whom I encounter sometimes just take advantage. It is like how i mentioned (or will mention in the other entries) about appearances being the main part. I'm not perfect, so do not judge me.
Why am I so nice? Is it because I would like to be treated the way I treat others? Why is it when you meet someone online, you automatically assume you like them right away? I do meet people online (especially on myspace), but My intentions are indeed to meet them in person so I may get to know them. I will admit that I have opened myself up to many on here, but I am not sure if they feel the same. I am a sweet heart, I will give you that much. I like helping people and people come to me for advice. I will admit I am a Jealous person, but not to the extent where it gets deadly. Yes, if someone I admired does not feel the same way, I do get hurt. I laugh, I cry, I breathe, I hurt. What else is there to do? A couple of people whom I guess I could say they are "electronic Penpals" because I haven't met them in person, I've developed a liking towards them. Not just because they are attractive, but they seem sweet. I've talked to them on the phone, and I do like them. I'm not trying to be a "player" here, but sometimes it is hard to choose. They tell me I am sweet, and sometimes that is the most I hear. It doesn't feel fair when you reveal your feelings to someone you admire when all they can say is that you are a good friend. In a way it is fair because they do care, just not the way you do. It just isn't fair when you would like them to be with you, when you have grown tired of dwelling on the past. The past that would seem to haunt you for the rest of your life. The past which hurts. The past 8 men who you considered your significant others. The past where you dwell on ones whom you crushed on during high school. Some aged higher than you, some below you..
You open your heart to others in need, but is it truly that you care? I do care. You open your heart to new somebodies who become your friends. Am I going to be just a friend? With this being said, Throughout a couple of years, I have found myself becoming shallow. The ones who were shallow with me, created me to become shallow myself. It isn't a pretty thing because a little thing called KARMA comes right back. The shallow me, casted away something I craved, when I knew I wasn't going to be happy. Need to say twice. Once, was over an act of Lust, the other, due to too many things happening that I did not know what I wanted. Why is it that I can be the kindest guy to prove to other guys that I can be a great boyfriend, but yet I do not get noticed because I lack a so called "hot body"? It's just the surroundings around us that have got us so messed up. Something i believe. Why is it that many people believe that they cannot live with out love? That love is something that runs their lives? I too had thought about that once. I myself do not want to end up alone. Yes, I do not want to end up alone, I want a family in my future. Even if I am gay, I would like a happy family of my own. A life partner, and perhaps some children. Being alone is ONE of my greatest fears. Not just that I won't have a partner, but my family or friends...
How would it feel if you were treated badly (emotionally i mean)? No body is perfect. This is not the world of Stepford or the world of "Utopia". If it were, I believe everyone would be happy, but it is not. This quote below is something I highly believe in, "The Perfect Couple stands on top of a Wedding Cake. For one, they don't have to look at eachother." [- Mary Alice Young, Desperate Houswives] Indeed it is true. But this isn't a perfect world. We're all Human beings and we make mistakes. We also learn from them as well. So if we think our love lives are a total mess, we have many to go until that holy union. In my case, I think I've ran into too many guys that has made me think of "giving up on love", but I have decided to take a break and focus on other things. Slowly but surely I am starting to bloom, because Yes I am meeting new people. Time will tell what happens to me and to others as well. I would just like to know why am I known to being such a nice guy?...
-[ALC]
Why is it that I am so sweet? All the guys whom I encounter sometimes just take advantage. It is like how i mentioned (or will mention in the other entries) about appearances being the main part. I'm not perfect, so do not judge me.
Why am I so nice? Is it because I would like to be treated the way I treat others? Why is it when you meet someone online, you automatically assume you like them right away? I do meet people online (especially on myspace), but My intentions are indeed to meet them in person so I may get to know them. I will admit that I have opened myself up to many on here, but I am not sure if they feel the same. I am a sweet heart, I will give you that much. I like helping people and people come to me for advice. I will admit I am a Jealous person, but not to the extent where it gets deadly. Yes, if someone I admired does not feel the same way, I do get hurt. I laugh, I cry, I breathe, I hurt. What else is there to do? A couple of people whom I guess I could say they are "electronic Penpals" because I haven't met them in person, I've developed a liking towards them. Not just because they are attractive, but they seem sweet. I've talked to them on the phone, and I do like them. I'm not trying to be a "player" here, but sometimes it is hard to choose. They tell me I am sweet, and sometimes that is the most I hear. It doesn't feel fair when you reveal your feelings to someone you admire when all they can say is that you are a good friend. In a way it is fair because they do care, just not the way you do. It just isn't fair when you would like them to be with you, when you have grown tired of dwelling on the past. The past that would seem to haunt you for the rest of your life. The past which hurts. The past 8 men who you considered your significant others. The past where you dwell on ones whom you crushed on during high school. Some aged higher than you, some below you..
You open your heart to others in need, but is it truly that you care? I do care. You open your heart to new somebodies who become your friends. Am I going to be just a friend? With this being said, Throughout a couple of years, I have found myself becoming shallow. The ones who were shallow with me, created me to become shallow myself. It isn't a pretty thing because a little thing called KARMA comes right back. The shallow me, casted away something I craved, when I knew I wasn't going to be happy. Need to say twice. Once, was over an act of Lust, the other, due to too many things happening that I did not know what I wanted. Why is it that I can be the kindest guy to prove to other guys that I can be a great boyfriend, but yet I do not get noticed because I lack a so called "hot body"? It's just the surroundings around us that have got us so messed up. Something i believe. Why is it that many people believe that they cannot live with out love? That love is something that runs their lives? I too had thought about that once. I myself do not want to end up alone. Yes, I do not want to end up alone, I want a family in my future. Even if I am gay, I would like a happy family of my own. A life partner, and perhaps some children. Being alone is ONE of my greatest fears. Not just that I won't have a partner, but my family or friends...
How would it feel if you were treated badly (emotionally i mean)? No body is perfect. This is not the world of Stepford or the world of "Utopia". If it were, I believe everyone would be happy, but it is not. This quote below is something I highly believe in, "The Perfect Couple stands on top of a Wedding Cake. For one, they don't have to look at eachother." [- Mary Alice Young, Desperate Houswives] Indeed it is true. But this isn't a perfect world. We're all Human beings and we make mistakes. We also learn from them as well. So if we think our love lives are a total mess, we have many to go until that holy union. In my case, I think I've ran into too many guys that has made me think of "giving up on love", but I have decided to take a break and focus on other things. Slowly but surely I am starting to bloom, because Yes I am meeting new people. Time will tell what happens to me and to others as well. I would just like to know why am I known to being such a nice guy?...
-[ALC]