Sep 12, 2004 18:24
i'm tired.
got back about an hour ago from our 150 mile bike ride.
my ass hurts.
i had my second near-death experience.
my knee is killing me.
i miss jess.
i want to hug and kiss her.
i miss amelia.
she needs a hug too.
i really really really miss my jess.
i have to continue doing out-patient.
for i don't know how long.
dr. snow thinx that telling me how long will
"negatively affect my recovery"
whatever. that's bull-shit.
not knowing is only making me angry and helpless.
i miss jess.
thanx to her lecture i HAVE been doing better
both at holly hill AND at home.
i haven't drinken in 3 weeks
even though there's a 3/4 full bottle of vodka
hiding in the freezer behind some frozen peas
and two beer bottles in fridge.
i'm all proud of myself.
i haven't raised my voice to my parents
(or anyone else for that matter)
in...lets say about a week.
i'm all proud of myself.
i'm kinda nervouse about what'll happen
when i DO get out of holly hill.
my grades are already poor
and plus i'll have like,
over 2 weeks of make-up work to do.
this is kinda freaking me out.
i really really really don't want to
repeat 10th grade.
and it seems that that is a real possibility as of now.
-shivers-
FUCK.
i'm gonna go eat goldfish for dinner.
i love you jess!!!!
WHOEVER HASN'T HEARD OF EMERY SHOULD GO OUT AND BUY THE CD. DO IT NOW, DO IT NOW!!!!! (your lord and master, foamy)