(no subject)
I have made three very important discoveries over the last evening; one such discovery being Doctor Hoffman knows who and what I am. This creates a series of unfortunate questions I wish could be answered, but I know will not be. In of itself, this was a discovery of some import, yet the trail leading to this will no doubt remain a mystery so long as I wish to continue receiving Doctor Hoffman's help.
This brings me to my second discovery. As I said earlier, she knows what I am, and knows who I am. I mistakenly went to her room late last evening with the intention of ending her life in an effort to protect my secret. It was my belief she intended to either reveal what I was to the family, or use the knowledge as leverage in an effort to gain vast portions of the ancestral family fortune from me.
This was both a justified, and yet incorrect assumption either way. As it happens, Doctor Hoffman is a true scientist. She has curiosities regarding my nature, and would like the opportunity to learn as much as possible about it. For scientists of her caliber, the supernatural does not exist. There are only sciences we can explain, and sciences we have not yet discovered. To her, I understandably fall within the latter.
I normally wouldn't have expressed an interest in helping her, and such a point would have been made by biting into her jugular, or perhaps by breaking her neck with my bare hands. However, a proposal put forth by the woman stayed my hand at the crucial moment. Not only does she believe in her abilities to investigate what I have become, but she also believes herself capable of finding a cure for my condition.
I try to imagine such a thing, and it is difficult. Could it be possible? As far fetched as the possibility might seem, I have been forced to live out my existence in a prescribed manner; I grow tired of it. I grow tired of the killing, the secrets, and the perpetual darkness.
Perhaps she is the key to my salvation.
The third and final discovery is one of self-reflection. I have learned quite by accident how fearful I have become in my old-age. Had I killed Doctor Hoffman without giving her a moment to speak her mind, I would not have stumbled on this wondrous possibility. I have learned the importance of patience from this recent interaction, and I value this lesson enough to learn from it. Let us hope I do not learn at a later time that it is perhaps best to rely on our first instincts after all.
This brings me to my second discovery. As I said earlier, she knows what I am, and knows who I am. I mistakenly went to her room late last evening with the intention of ending her life in an effort to protect my secret. It was my belief she intended to either reveal what I was to the family, or use the knowledge as leverage in an effort to gain vast portions of the ancestral family fortune from me.
This was both a justified, and yet incorrect assumption either way. As it happens, Doctor Hoffman is a true scientist. She has curiosities regarding my nature, and would like the opportunity to learn as much as possible about it. For scientists of her caliber, the supernatural does not exist. There are only sciences we can explain, and sciences we have not yet discovered. To her, I understandably fall within the latter.
I normally wouldn't have expressed an interest in helping her, and such a point would have been made by biting into her jugular, or perhaps by breaking her neck with my bare hands. However, a proposal put forth by the woman stayed my hand at the crucial moment. Not only does she believe in her abilities to investigate what I have become, but she also believes herself capable of finding a cure for my condition.
I try to imagine such a thing, and it is difficult. Could it be possible? As far fetched as the possibility might seem, I have been forced to live out my existence in a prescribed manner; I grow tired of it. I grow tired of the killing, the secrets, and the perpetual darkness.
Perhaps she is the key to my salvation.
The third and final discovery is one of self-reflection. I have learned quite by accident how fearful I have become in my old-age. Had I killed Doctor Hoffman without giving her a moment to speak her mind, I would not have stumbled on this wondrous possibility. I have learned the importance of patience from this recent interaction, and I value this lesson enough to learn from it. Let us hope I do not learn at a later time that it is perhaps best to rely on our first instincts after all.